Real life MMD: My hubby earns more. Should he pay more of joint bills?

Former_MSE_Debs
Former_MSE_Debs Posts: 890 Forumite
edited 28 February 2012 at 4:07PM in MoneySaving polls
Money Moral Dilemma: My hubby earns more. Should he pay more of joint bills?


When I moved in with my husband two years ago, we agreed to each pay half of all bills. He now earns twice as much as I do, so is it now a little unfair? I can afford to pay my half of the bills and still have money to buy clothes, go out, etc, but I struggle to save. My husband isn't mean, and happily pays for meals out more often than I do. But it's unfair I need to pay as much when he has more disposable income than I do. Should I ask him to contribute a greater share of the bills?


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  • jamespir
    jamespir Posts: 21,456 Forumite
    i think when you are married you should split things 50/50 so i dont think he should pay more
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  • Evilm
    Evilm Posts: 1,950 Forumite
    Umm.. why aren't you discussing this with him and feel the need to ask here first? You shouldn't feel this is an awkward conversation with someone you are married to.

    To be honest Me and My hubby now have a joint account and freedom to spend what we like so it doesn't come up. We respect each other and discuss adhoc items over £100 between us before spending the money though.

    When we weren't married and had only just moved in together hubby did pay about 1/3rd more into the joint account for bills. He was earning about 1/3rd more than me at the time.
  • Um hang on a minute, a marriage is a partnership, all money is joint money so whyare you both paying an amount?. Both of our wages go into a joint account and bills are paid from it. There is No you pay half and so will i! what happens if u have children and you.stop working how will you pay your share? I never have to justify what I have spent money on as I pay my share into the *pot*. My husband earns 4x my salary, but that is not an issue to us. :mad:
  • I really feel this shouldnt be an issue. My husband an I have all our money paid into 1 account and then put money aside for bills savings etc and spend the rest between us. He earns far more than I do and is happy with this. We opened a joint account a few months before we were married and it has always been like this. I am the one in charge of moving all of the money around to make sure the bills etc are paid.
    It honestly would never even occur to me to say 'well this is my half of the bills'. We're married, we share everything.
  • tescobabe69
    tescobabe69 Posts: 7,504 Forumite
    OP are you sure you're married ?
    My wife has never paid a household bill in her life, she wouldnt know how.
  • qetu1357
    qetu1357 Posts: 1,013
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker
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    Husband earns £2000, wife earns £1000, bills are £1000.

    Husband pays bills so both husband and wife are left with £1000.

    This is the fairest way.
  • Techno
    Techno Posts: 1,169
    First Post First Anniversary Combo Breaker
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    If neither of you want a joint account then work out all of your outgoings including food, car, utilities, mortgage; holidays, pressies, joint savings etc and split it in the ratio of 2:1 (if he earns double) you are then sharing the expenses in proportion to what you earn. Whatever is left over is your 'pocket money' to do with as you wish.
    ;) If you think you are too small to make a difference, try getting in bed with a mosquito!
  • pogie2
    pogie2 Posts: 92 Forumite
    Im lucky not to be in this situation. I am a stay at home mum si earn £0. My hubby and I believe we are a single entity and therefore everything is ours not his or mine. I think it is terrible to do it any other way. Doesn't sound like a marriage to me. More like housemates!!!
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  • gloriouslyhappy
    gloriouslyhappy Posts: 595
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    edited 29 February 2012 at 12:58AM
    My husband and I put all our money in a joint account then each gets a personal allowance from the left overs after the bills are paid and the savings accounts are fed. The personal allowance is the same amount for both of us regardless of whose income was bigger that month and varies depending on how the bills work out that month (one bad patch it was £25 each!). We think that's fair, and that way it's our money to do with as we like no questions asked, but you should work out what feels fair to you. Never mind people saying "but you're married, you're one unit now", everyone needs their own personal spending money if only to buy the other one birthday presents!
  • jax1305
    jax1305 Posts: 47 Forumite
    before I left the rat race for the delights of full time parenting, we used to put all our money together to pay for everything, on the basis that joint living required joint paying and joint saving required whatever else was left.
    in order to overcome any squabbles about spending joint money on personal spending, we took an amount out each month for our individual use, to spend on what we wanted, thus avoiding any resentment about either of us spending more than the other, regardless of earnings. he spent his (pretty much in full) every month, I didn't - hence I've now got a nest egg to spend on whatever I feel like, when I like, even though I'm not earning a wage now.
    So, it's worked for us - maybe it would work for the OP.
    Just realised gloriouslyhappy does the same :) so that's two of us - the campaign begins!
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