Self help thread. I am a widow coping getting on with it

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  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 12,492
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    ooh Elona, it is lovely shopping for your first grandchild

    LL yes I agree with Elona, you are a city gal. I must say that I loved my townhouse a lot, I loved going upstairs to my living room and further upstairs to my bedroom. Going upstairs was like burying myself in a nest, away from the world and even now, as an older single, I could easily relish living in a townhouse.

    Your practice room would likely be on that different level to your living space, so you would separate that energy which people bring and is often often needy energy, from your living space, compartments. One day when you feel that you want to retire, then you do a space clearing to remove those lurking energies. I could see this type of house being a permanent home for you, you may never feel the need to downsize if you love it
  • lessonlearned
    lessonlearned Posts: 13,337
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    Kittie...thanks for your input on this. You have just crystallised what I was thinking.

    The town house has an integral garage.....on the ground floor of course.....:rotfl: Just spoken to my builder and he tells me converting it would be "a doddle". The only thing we have to do is leave the garage door in situ because it is in a conservation area.

    So we could have the first few feet of the garage as storage and the back section as my treatment room. There is a downstairs cloakroom as well a separate utility room where I could slot in a separate fridge and tea making facilities. CLients would then not have to encroach on my living space. It would be far more professional than having them in my personal space and I think clients would prefer it that way too. .

    The house was built in the 1990s so the garage is too small for most modern cars, even new minis are too wide these days for older garages. There is still a covered porch area as well as a drive, so still room for off street parking. Most garages end up as junk rooms don't they.

    The more I think about it....this might be the one. I viewed one in the same street a couple of years ago and like it very much. It's a bit more than I want to pay......aren't they always :rotfl: so as I say I'll speak to my broker tomorrow. I will have to dip into my savings but hopefully not too much.

    I know I can add value to the house just by freshening it up......its been let out and is loooking very shabby. A complete redec from top to bottom. Just been looking at carpet shampooers as a quick fix, although I would probably redo the floors eventually. .If I do convert the garage to add an additional reception room or 4th bedroom, that alone will add a lot of value.

    Yep think this might be the one. .........
  • Elona_2
    Elona_2 Posts: 361
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    LL

    Your plans for a treatment room sound lovely and I like the sound of the plans for the cloakroom.

    I have just ordered the baby travel system which will arrive in a month and have found someone to do some handyman jobs (I hope) as I want a set of garage storage putting up and a china cabinet needs a little assembly as well as hoping to have curtain poles put up in the integral garage. I left a message and am waiting for a return call. Middle dds bf seems keen on the idea of practising laying floor tiles or lino for me in the garage.

    LL
    In the old house I had a pale carpet dd had trekked muddy boots all over and despaired of sorting it out. I dissolved a little original Stardrops in a basin of warmish water and whisked it into a foam then used a clean long handled brush to work the foam into the carpet and left it for about a day before hoovering the carpet. It made a fantastic job of getting rid of the stains and brought up the carpet like new.

    Your plans for the garage sound so good I am now thinking of getting the storage and fridge freezer removed to the outside garage and then having the old kitchen table and chairs near the french windows for barbecues etc. The old sofa moved in there with decent flooring and curtains would make it more like a room and be a good space for a toddler to play in with push along toys, space for painting etc.
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 12,492
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    elona, several of the properties I looked at had their freezer and general storage in the garage, no-one had a car in there. I have soft flooring in my garage, which actually makes it quite a comfortable area, so yes a garage can make a very useful add-on for a house. I bought my dd a travel system when she was pregnant, it was a joy looking at baby clothes and toys

    I am so tired today, really cream crackered and I think it is down to the house hunting, which has also been mentally draining. I nodded off twice today and hardly done any jobs, just given in to it today, knowing that I will likely have my energy back tomorrow. I cannot even think straight at the moment and reading is pointless

  • The town house has an integral garage.....on the ground floor of course.....:rotfl: Just spoken to my builder and he tells me converting it would be "a doddle". The only thing we have to do is leave the garage door in situ because it is in a conservation area.

    So we could have the first few feet of the garage as storage and the back section as my treatment room. There is a downstairs cloakroom as well a separate utility room where I could slot in a separate fridge and tea making facilities. CLients would then not have to encroach on my living space. It would be far more professional than having them in my personal space and I think clients would prefer it that way too. .

    The house opposite has done this to make a dining room, it is very effective and the small area of garage that is left is useful for the usual storage things but I was surprised when I first saw the garage doors open as I thought you will never fit a car in there :rotfl:
  • lessonlearned
    lessonlearned Posts: 13,337
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    edited 30 April 2018 at 6:40PM
    A child's pedal car maybe.....:rotfl:

    Thanks for all your ideas and feedback. It's really helped me think things through.

    Well now had my first offer on this house. It was a bit cheeky so I've declined it. There are more viewings booked this week so still plenty of interest. As I said before I think it will find it's level and I think I will get pretty near to my asking price. I just need to hold my nerve and not grab the first offer.

    Rang the broker, sees no problem with how much I want to borrow. So I'm going to do a telephone application on Wednesday for an Advance In Principle, so I can be ready to go.

    Booked to view the townhouse on Thursday. At this stage it is now very much the front runner so I don't think I'll bother viewing anything else.

    I've viewed one of these houses before, know the layout and I know the street. I know it's shabby inside because it has been a rental. But, then again, if it were in tip top condition it would be another £20k, so I'm happy to get the carpet shampooer and the paint rollers out. So ......unless there are any really nasty shocks I think this is the one. I can be cracking on with the decorating upstairs whilst my builder converts the garage.

    Then in a couple of years time I can think about a new kitchen but for now it's fine. I can do an interim cheap and cheerful fix, paint the tiles and maybe the kitchen units just to freshen it all up. It's amazing what you can do with a few gallons of Paint. :rotfl:

    Feeling much more positive now.

    Elona.......In our old house we used the integral garage as a gym plus had the freezer and storage units at the top end. I painted the breeze blocks white and the floor with garage floor paint (the red one) to seal it and cut down the concrete dust. I had two unwanted matching large carpets (fake oriental only cheap man made ones) so I put those down. Worked a treat against the dark red painted floor.

    Depending on what you want you can get special rubber mats which interlock together. Costco do them but I'm sure you could get them online from eBay or Amazon. They would be nice and cushioney for a playroom and You could always put a rug or some really cheap foam backed carpeting on top if you wanted to make it look less "industrial" and a bit more homely.

    Kittie I have been absolutley shattered today. I agree it's all this house business, my brain has been whirling. I'm going to have m supper now and just watch a film to wind down.....maybe a g&t. I think I've earned it. .......
  • [Deleted User]
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    I feel progress is happening for you LL :)

    I woke up back to normal today, I remember thinking last night, what if I won a million £? I would still have the same dilemma ie what area would I like to live in, I might do the MoSCoW list today but I do think I am clarifying my thoughts. Must have, Should have, Could have

    I saw ugly house to lovely house last night, pretty inspirational, lots of ideas but must remember that it isn`t good to be the most expensive in a set location

    I also did the inflation thing and now know my limit better

    So it feels as though my energy is back, I will know when I cycle to the allotment. I don`t feel achey but I did take some drops of cbd yesterday evening. It helps a lot, it is very expensive so I don`t use it often and only twice this week, it has taken me out of the inflammation/ache cycle
  • poppy811
    poppy811 Posts: 540
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    I did post the other day but it appears to have disappeared into the ether!Anyway basically the bungalow was not for me. The builder was concerned about the gable end and recommended a structural engineer's report before proceeding. This would cost in the region of £400. Rough costs to do the work I would like would be between £15000 and £20000 pounds so I am going to keep looking. Photo's have been taken of my house and energy report is booked for Friday so hopefully should be on the market next week. Still freezing here but at least the sun is out. Hosting Book club this morning
  • lessonlearned
    lessonlearned Posts: 13,337
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    Hi Poppy. ...yes sounds like you are best to keep looking. I am certainly not going to be rushed into anything. We will all find "THe One" in the end.

    I was due to do my mortgage application this I morning but as I haven't yet had an acceptable offer on this house I have decided to postpone it. No point in shelling out fees until I know for sure I'm going ahead.

    I will still view the townhouse tomorrow. If it sells before I am in a position to proceed then so be it. I'm certainly not going to take out a bridging loan.

    Ke sera and all that.

    Shocking day here, absolutley tipping it down. College tonight so I will
    Take it fairy easy today....

    Not sleeping terribly well. There's a surprise. :rotfl: just too much brain whir going on.
  • Elona_2
    Elona_2 Posts: 361
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    LL

    It is chucking it down here as well so having a quiet morning before washing hair and getting ready for library volunteering in the afternoon.

    Yesterday was a bit wobbly as it was the third anniversary of losing DH and it just suddenly hit me. Today seems to be better and dd popped in early to drop off her cat here as wet paint and a black fluffy cat does not bode well.

    Hugs to all
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