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Lodger wanting to cook

1246720

Comments

  • FreeBear
    FreeBear Posts: 14,420
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    Not angry. Concerned for my personal safety.

    The threat of "forcible" removal is implied by the presence of the police - If I feel their presence is needed, a quick call is all that is needed. Can also call on a neighbour who works for the local prison service. Hopefully, it won't get to that stage.
    Her courage will change the world.

    Treasure the moments that you have. Savour them for as long as you can for they will never come back again.
  • sevenhills
    sevenhills Posts: 5,838
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    FreeBear wrote: »
    Not angry. Concerned for my personal safety.
    The threat of "forcible" removal is implied by the presence of the police - If I feel their presence is needed, a quick call is all that is needed. Can also call on a neighbour who works for the local prison service. Hopefully, it won't get to that stage.


    I understand you must give reasonable notice, if you are in fear, immediate removal is needed.
  • Red-Squirrel_2
    Red-Squirrel_2 Posts: 4,341 Forumite
    FreeBear wrote: »
    Not angry. Concerned for my personal safety.

    The threat of "forcible" removal is implied by the presence of the police - If I feel their presence is needed, a quick call is all that is needed. Can also call on a neighbour who works for the local prison service. Hopefully, it won't get to that stage.

    Your neighbour should have more sense than to get physical with someone outside of work where he has no authority to.

    I’d go with Margot123’s advice if I were you.
  • FreeBear
    FreeBear Posts: 14,420
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    Have the local police crisis intervention team on board, and they will provide as much assistance as possible. It shouldn't get "physical", and "forcible" should only extend to supervision and a guiding hand.
    Her courage will change the world.

    Treasure the moments that you have. Savour them for as long as you can for they will never come back again.
  • melanzana
    melanzana Posts: 3,953
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    Sorry to hear this OP, and I hope you are safe and well.

    In a lodger situation, the default position should be single occupancy and no overnights for their guests. Cook their own food and be respectful of the house owner.

    There are plenty of people who will abide by those house rules.
  • need_an_answer
    need_an_answer Posts: 2,812
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    As this was your first experience of lodgers OP,will you go down that route again?

    just curious to know really.

    Has it been worth it both in terms of the personal and financial learning curve?

    I have rental properties and have no issues with renting but I really value my own space and would never have lodgers,I struggle sometimes with overnight and weekend guests!
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  • elsien
    elsien Posts: 32,521
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    From another thread the issues appear to have been resolved and the lodger is still in situ.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
  • Red-Squirrel_2
    Red-Squirrel_2 Posts: 4,341 Forumite
    elsien wrote: »
    From another thread the issues appear to have been resolved and the lodger is still in situ.

    Yes, and apparently domestic violence has become completely forgiveable and understandable! :eek:
  • FreeBear
    FreeBear Posts: 14,420
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    edited 3 July 2018 at 12:49AM
    Yes, and apparently domestic violence has become completely forgiveable and understandable! :eek:

    Violence, domestic, or any other form is not acceptable. However, I have a front seat with this particular pair, and can see some of the background issues. Trust me, it is not the bloke who is always the guilty party. Sometimes, it is the woman stoking the fire and trying to get a reaction.

    Would I have another lodger ?
    Sure, but I would have to be selective. No more couples, and someone who is quiet, clean & tidy, sociable, and that I can trust. The extra money is a major help, and having someone around to talk to is good. An extra pair of hands on call when doing DIY is a godsend.

    And before you ask, yes I'm up late. Mediating another argument and attempting to prevent it turning in to a bloodbath. Sharp knives are locked away, and a police car is sitting outside.
    Her courage will change the world.

    Treasure the moments that you have. Savour them for as long as you can for they will never come back again.
  • nimbo
    nimbo Posts: 3,698
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    Get them out.

    There!!!8217;s already been more than one argument. Their relationship may be volatile - but there is never an excuse to get physical with someone - unless self defence. This sounds physical on more than one occasion. Neither will charge their behaviours. Both need professional support.

    You will not change them. Also he sounds as though he!!!8217;s started to smarm his way under your skin too. Perpetrators are very often smooth and good at portraying themselves as a victim of unreasonable behaviour. Sometimes they!!!8217;ve even are the victim of unreasonable behaviours - this still does not excuse a physical response.

    It is not normal to have police cars outside your home as you are concerned for your welfare and the welfare of your lodgers.

    If you need excitement there are much safer ways to find it. Wanna be celebrity sex island for example is on. I!!!8217;m sure the jungle will be back soon enough...

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