Money Moral Dilemma: Is it OK to spend my baby's vouchers on myself?
Comments
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Pyjamas??! Don’t be so boring! Flog the gift vouchers, then use the proceeds to buy some Diamond White cider and 20 Bensons.0
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Are the vouchers time limited? If not, keep them for any new items baby will need.
If they have an expiry date and baby really does have everything needed for the foreseeable future, buy the pyjamas as no doubt you will be wearing them when you get up at night to cope with teething pain, and to be warm when you change the wet nappies until she is toilet trained.
I don't think I would tell the donors though.
Best wishes for you and family in the future.0 -
Polycat I can't believe people like you are real life.... stealing from her baby ... really? People like you who obviously only join these sites to give out your two pennies worth of degrading opinions should be ashamed. The very fact this mum is questioning this shows shes a good enough mother. That's all we are required to be ' good enough ' theres no such thing as perfect which why moral questions are not black and white or right and wrong! Who are you to have the moral high ground on any topic.
Quite frankly social media is vile enough without you degrading people. Unless your feedback is constructive or helpful then take yourself off. I only joined this to reply to this post as I hope that mum does not take on your crap words and go feel guilty about something she shouldn't.
From one mum to another you are doing the best you can and the fact the baby has all it needs speaks volumes. You will get ppl such as the above everywhere you go unfortunately but try drown out their attention seeking self validating pleas and you do you.
Treat yourself!!!! :money:theoretica wrote: »If the baby doesn't need anything now I agree it is more sensible to spend the vouchers than leave them sitting to expire/be forgotten or buy things the baby doesn't need. I am confident the parents will buy clothes for the child at some time during its life, when it needs them, and spend more than the value of the voucher!
M&S vouchers seem to me the sort of present intended to be useful.
While I personally agree with theoretica, and think the baby's going to sick up on the mum's pyjamas at some point so she might as well have the new pair now as the baby's got all it needs at the moment, I think there's no need for LouAnne's personal attack on Pollycat, above. She should note Pollycat is a respected poster with 23,828 posts which have received 64,170 thanks against her own 1 post and 1 thanks, and respect the right of everyone to hold their own opinion. It's what this forum is intended for. 'Nuff said.0 -
Pause a moment. It is good that the righteous should have an outlet, however don't try to outrighteous them. Leave it to Mum to make the decisi!n. Good luck with your baby, Mum.0
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Liquidate the vouchers at the wobbleade emporium, you deserve a glass!0
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unholyangel wrote: »Personally I would be perfectly fine with it. After all, most likely I'm only gifting to baby because of my relationship with mum and/or dad - and friends I'd gift for are the type of people who would ensure their babies needs are met first.
Might feel different if it was something luxurious & extravagant, but a pair of PJs? Wouldn't even cross my mind.
Actually, I think if mum called me and explained that baby has everything but she’s not spent on herself since it was born and her pjs are all falling apart, and asked how I felt about spending the vouchers on that, i’d definitely tell her to go ahead. I don’t think i’d be impressed if she just did it though. At what age would you think it stops being acceptable for parents to pocket their kids’ gift money?0 -
onwards&upwards wrote: »But it was a birthday present to somebody else, if you give a gift to a child would you genuinely be perfectly fine with the parent taking it from them and using it themselves?
I agree with this.onwards&upwards wrote: »Actually, I think if mum called me and explained that baby has everything but she’s not spent on herself since it was born and her pjs are all falling apart, and asked how I felt about spending the vouchers on that, i’d definitely tell her to go ahead. I don’t think i’d be impressed if she just did it though. At what age would you think it stops being acceptable for parents to pocket their kids’ gift money?
The original post says:
I'm assuming by 'vouchers' the author of this 'dilemma' means gift cards.We were given loads of M&S vouchers for my baby's first birthday. She genuinely has everything she needs, so I'm thinking of buying myself new pyjamas. Would that be wrong?
M&S gift cards are valid for 24 months.
https://www.marksandspencer.com/c/help/gift-cards-and-egift-cards/is-there-an-expiry-date-for-my-gift-card-e-gift-cardGift cards & e-gift cards
M&S gift cards and e-gift cards are valid for 24 months and can be loaded with up to £1,000 and used to pay for most things online and in store in the UK, Eire and the Channel Islands. When you’ve finished shopping, select ‘Pay by gift card/reward voucher’ at the checkout.
So does the baby have everything it needs for the next 2 years?
If someone bought my husband a gift voucher/card, I would not dream of using it for myself 'because he has everything he needs' without recompensating him for that gift.
I'm shocked that people are serious here in thinking that it's OK to do that.
Does anyone else think the author of this 'dilemma' really - deep down - knows that it would be wrong but is hoping someone will say 'go for it'?0 -
How about a middle ground?
Say there is £200 of M&S vouchers, all from friends and family members.
They have an expiry date of 24months.
Go out and buy fifty quids worth of lovely things for your household, that you need, including pyjamas. I'd certainly add good freezer food, a nice box of chocs and some exciting nibbles for the middle of the night whilst feeding the baby.
Then allocate the rest towards any other shopping you're likely to do in the next year, including baby stuff. Anything that you buy for yourself/gifts/food put that amount into a savings account, or premium bonds for your baby.
As you near the 18mth time check over what you need for your toddler that can be bought from M&S, and use the vouchers.
Any amount outstanding can then be allocated to other things which may well include food that also feeds the child.
And, please, enjoy the fact you have interested and generous people who like you and your family and clearly think you are worth gifting to.0 -
I am going to be controversial here and say: it's entirely up to you. You don't need to justify your spending to anyone, even the people who gifted the voucher. They trusted you to use it wisely and it's not like you are getting crack cocaine with it.
Personally, I would not even bother asking anyone's opinion. Go ahead and do what you feel is right.0 -
Literally just joined the forum to says YES GIRL. You birthed that baby and are literally going to sacrifice the rest of your life and income for that kid...of course you should buy yourself some PJ’s...and a bottle of fizz and nice cake from the food hall while you’re at it! Also when I give my friends who have babies money/vouchers I usually assume they’ll just use it to help out the household. Don’t guilt trip yourself!0
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