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  • phunkles
    Im more possessive over my phone than he is - not sure why ~I have nothing to hide
    although I did once find some texts on his that I wish I hadnt when I was flicking through trying to find a text with some info in id sent him
    But hes free to look at mine anytime he wants?
    *dont know icon*
    We do answer each others phones anyway if the other one isnt near (his rings more than mine to be fair and i love talking to his boss lol)
    Love is the answer. At least for most of the questions in my heart,
    Like why are we here? And where do we go?And how come it's so hard?
    It's not always easy,And sometimes life can be deceiving,
    I'll tell you one thing, its always better when we're together
    • jackieb
    • By jackieb 15th Feb 10, 10:56 AM
    • 26,981 Posts
    • 78,788 Thanks
    jackieb
    I have nothing to hide. My phone's ancient but the battery in it is brilliant and outlasts everyone elses phones. I often offer it to my sons to take to college, or to my husband if he's going out and their batteries aren't charged, or if their credit is low. My offer is there. The phone is left lying about - anyone can have a gander and see what's on it. More often than not they refuse my offer because my phone is 6 years old and a bit of a brick.
    • lostinrates
    • By lostinrates 15th Feb 10, 11:09 AM
    • 53,939 Posts
    • 342,716 Thanks
    lostinrates
    Not only are neither of us secretive about phones, but we have the same model of mobile. Its not uncommon for us to take the ''wrong''phone. Annoying when he grabs mine on a Monday morning, as he's away till Friday, but not the end of the world. also our hotmail accounts are linked and he frequently asks me to deal with his ''social'' email when he's snowed under at work...just going through diaries to accept or turn down invitations, pay memberships to things etc.
    • hayley11
    • By hayley11 15th Feb 10, 11:17 AM
    • 7,367 Posts
    • 14,864 Thanks
    hayley11
    I have nothing to hide so i'm completely open with my phone. My OH is always nicking mine to play on while he goes to the loo! (sorry is that TMI??)

    My OH on the other hand has, in the past, been very naughty with his phone, texting people behind my back, being so secretive, deleting messages etc. We almost broke up over it to be honest but we're okay now and he's not secretive at all.
    Think happy & you'll be happy
    I my doggies
    • red devil
    • By red devil 15th Feb 10, 11:20 AM
    • 10,414 Posts
    • 7,761 Thanks
    red devil
    oh dosent have a phone dosent need one or really want one!

    I have a phone its more for emergencies and the odd text i dont use it much. I use mainly the house phone and email.
  • archived user
    I have no problems with calls/texts in front of bf. To be honest those who tend to be secretive usually have something to hide.
  • Proc
    Nah my personal phone is clean so I don't hide anything.

    When I'm having my fun and games, I generally use my work phone...which is switched off at night and has a full password protection to turn it on.

    So no, I'm not possessive.
    • realised
    • By realised 15th Feb 10, 11:51 AM
    • 463 Posts
    • 247 Thanks
    realised
    I'm not really possesive with my phone either. Like everyone else says, I have nothing to hide

    Although, I am a terrible lier and when I do have something to hide in my text messages (E.g Texts from friends regarding presents I'm purchasing for my OH) he always seems to know and it's at that moment when he wants to look at my messages! Then I get all defensive because I don't want to ruin the surprise. (but by that time he already knows im planning something!)

    I think I set off some sort of radar lol
    • bestpud
    • By bestpud 15th Feb 10, 11:52 AM
    • 10,491 Posts
    • 21,313 Thanks
    bestpud
    I'm only possessive of my right to basic privacy. The method of contacting me doesn't come into it. It's the intrusion that would be the problem. It's only in my lifetime that women have had property and divorce rights in law so yes, I'm quite fierce about it.

    I'd be furious if my hubby had a little nosey round my phone without my express permission. Saying to him that Aunty Edna sent a picture postcard from Skegness and it's there on the coffee table if you want to look is a long way from him daring to pick up and read my letters. I'd be astounded and very angry if he mentioned to me later something that he had picked up from my emails.

    I have nothing to hide but if there is something he ought to know about (hospital appointment, the next vet appointment) I'll tell him myself. The state of Aunty Edna's piles is not a vital thing for him to know. I consider myself adult enough to be trusted to behave responsibly so there is no reason for anyone to be checking up on my doings.

    My handbag is also sacrosanct and heaven help the husband or child who goes rooting in there - they're liable to find said handbag smacking them around the ear!
    Originally posted by paddy's mum
    Ooh, yes, I would never go in a handbag!!

    In fact I hate looking through someone's bag with their permission and will usually pass them the bag if they ask me to grab something from it as I'm closer.

    I feel the same about pockets; I will empty them if putting clothes in the wash, but the stuff is just placed on the side as it is - I would never rifle through it.

    It's quite sad how suspicious people are tbh.

    When did people stop trusting their loved ones, or has it always been that way? It's not hard to see why the divorce rate is so high when there is all this mistrust in relationships.
    • SugarSpun
    • By SugarSpun 15th Feb 10, 12:24 PM
    • 8,504 Posts
    • 44,693 Thanks
    SugarSpun
    I'm incredibly possessive about my Facebook, but that's because we have an ongoing "change the FB status" war and not because I'm hiding something.

    My phone, I'm not at all possessive, and my email is strictly off limits only in the couple of months before Christmas and his birthday.

    He's similarly open with his stuff, although he has this absolute terror of going into my bag even when I ask him to pass me something out of it.

    I'd be furious if I knew he was looking through my phone/email without me knowing because snooping is something completely different from looking for something or checking to see who's calling and would signify that he doesn't trust me - and since I'm not doing anything untoward that would really hurt me. But everyday reasons for checking my phone/email - not a problem at all.
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    • DeeDee74
    • By DeeDee74 15th Feb 10, 3:57 PM
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    DeeDee74
    ohh anyone can look though my phone im not bothered there's nowt intresting or anything that shouldn't be on there.
    my ex oh used to be glued to his phone, there again when i did get sneek peek at it he had naked pic's on there so im not suprised it was with him 24 7....
    Ignore reality.There's nothing you can do about it.
    I have done reading too!
    personally test's all her own finds
    • Glad
    • By Glad 15th Feb 10, 7:49 PM
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    Glad
    Hi, Martinís asked me to post this in these circumstances: Iíve asked Board Guides to move discussions from the MoneySaving boards if theyíre not related to MoneySaving to help everyone find the MoneySaving tips and discussion quicker (please see this rule) so this post/thread has been moved to Discussion Time/The Arms. If you have any questions about this policy please email abuse@moneysavingexpert.com.
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  • Bonnie2009
    I'm only possessive of my right to basic privacy. The method of contacting me doesn't come into it. It's the intrusion that would be the problem. It's only in my lifetime that women have had property and divorce rights in law so yes, I'm quite fierce about it.

    Originally posted by paddy's mum
    Paddy's mum, you're wearing very well!

    1882 Married Women's Property Act.
    1857 Women had the right to divorce in the UK
  • Bonnie2009
    Dammit, double post!
    • christmas carole
    • By christmas carole 17th Feb 10, 11:27 AM
    • 115 Posts
    • 84 Thanks
    christmas carole
    My OH keeps his phone in his pocket at all times, and on the bedside cabinet when he's asleep, It makes me feel very uneasy..... Mine is left lying aroung for anyone to have a look through, nothing to hide.
    Maybe because once when we were having a difficult period he left it behind and went out, by accident obviously, I did have a look and there was a text to his ex wife they arent divorced btw and it had a x at the end, I was furious and It caused a huge row as I know when he puts a x at the end it does mean something!!!!!
  • jyericho
    No I do not get possessive but is more about privacy as highlighted by most of the people.
  • dunclane
    I let my wife read out my texts to me if she is nearer, having said that they do pop up on the screen to be read by everyone! (iphone). I have nothing to hide.
    I also have conversations in front of her much to her annoyance as I have a loud voice! lol
  • LucyTheDwarf
    I have nothing to hide, but I'd feel really uncomfortable with him reading my texts. He can answer my calls any day though. He once made a play of reading through my texts, joking about finding out about my "other men" and I went loopy... makes me look suspicious but I can't help it! I kind of don't want him to see how I am with others... I've long put on an act with others to mask shyness, and he'll see through my false confidence too easily.

    We both leave our phones out and about though - he hasn't a problem with me reading his texts or answering his calls, if I'm closer.
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  • katyboo123
    Im not bothered about other half reading texts or emails, but sometimes there has been instances where she's mistaken the content to be something else. Like the time I text a friend, she'd said something horrid but jokingly and I replied with 'oh, love you too! ha'... unfortunately, I didn't keep the original message off the friend and fur flew!

    I always just think / say, don't look and you wont see something you take the wrong way or which offends you. I would never look at my OH phone / email, etc, and we don't have facebook as we have too much on with the rest of life to be bothered with status updates and stuff, though I do miss it!

    I reckon if you check you are doing so because you suspect something and don't respect your OHs privacy, which I don't think is very good basis for a relationship xx
  • LilacPixie
    doesn't bother me if he reads my txts or answers calls but what does bother me is him actually touching my phone. Its a touch screen but quite narrow and small, perfect for my narrow girl fingers but his big fat man fingers hits about 4 things at once, switches on the internet, calls my boss and plays music similtaniously. One time he changed my ring tone and i missed a few calls because I genuinly didn't realise my phone was ringing.
    MF aim 10th December 2020
    MFW 2012 no86 OP 0/2000
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