Butti's Journey: A matter of loaf and death

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  • ZTD
    ZTD Posts: 24,327 Forumite
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    Butti wrote: »
    Just contemplating a change of job - closing date is in 10 days time.
    Same job, in an office:j:j:j with people :j:j:j:j about 15 miles away rather than 45:j:j:j for about £1.5k less if they appoint me at the bottom of the scale :(

    So, £1.5K per annum which is about £28.85 per week, which is (armwaving) about £20 after tax, NI, etc etc.

    Working 5 days a week, you will do approx 30x5=150 miles pw as opposed to 90x5=450 miles pw - or approx 300 miles less.

    Assuming 30 mpg, that's 10 gallons saved pw. Ten gallons vs £20...

    Why are you just contemplating this?
    Butti wrote: »
    But with real people :j:j:j


    Do it!
    "Follow the money!" - Deepthroat (AKA William Mark Felt Sr - Associate Director of the FBI)
    "We were born and raised in a summer haze." Adele 'Someone like you.'
    "Blowing your mind, 'cause you know what you'll find, when you're looking for things in the sky."     OMD 'Julia's Song'
  • Butti
    Butti Posts: 5,014 Forumite
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    beanielou wrote: »

    First aid for the head sounds good.......

    I was super cynical two years ago when I went for EMDR. But I felt so sh*t and so depressed and so MEH....I thought what have you got to lose. At the end of it I was so much calmer and positive and not stressed.

    This is amazing. I sit down for 25 minutes and listen to an audio where very reasonable suggestions are made like "I can choose to live on my own terms" and "Do not seek for conscious awareness where there is none". And at various points during the day, about 10, I sit and breathe deeply to take myself into a relaxed state and say;

    "I am allowed to say No"
    "I am allowed to express anger"
    "I can do confrontation without emotion"

    It's a bit of a revelation TBH.
    Debt LBM (08/09) £11,641. DEBT FREE APRIL 2021.
    Diary 'Butti's journey : A matter of loaf or death'.
    Diary 2 'The whimsical tale of the Waterbed of Debt'         48% off mortgage
    'one day I will be rich and famous…for now I'll just have to settle for being poor and incredibly sexy'. Vimrod Member of MIKE'S :cool: MOB
  • Butti
    Butti Posts: 5,014 Forumite
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    edited 4 April 2018 at 8:40PM
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    I don't drive to the office everyday if you remember because if I did they wouldn't pay me any mileage.

    Hobson's choice

    1. Be office based drive 90 miles a day and have them take the 90 miles off any mileage you do i.e. all your miles to do your job are 'social' miles
    2. Be based from home, get your mileage, feel isolated, feel depressed, watch the business suffer because communication is none existant.

    You are right folks. If it's interview practice it's good. If it's a stepping stone it's good. If its with people it's good.
    Debt LBM (08/09) £11,641. DEBT FREE APRIL 2021.
    Diary 'Butti's journey : A matter of loaf or death'.
    Diary 2 'The whimsical tale of the Waterbed of Debt'         48% off mortgage
    'one day I will be rich and famous…for now I'll just have to settle for being poor and incredibly sexy'. Vimrod Member of MIKE'S :cool: MOB
  • beanielou
    beanielou Posts: 90,270 Ambassador
    Academoney Grad I'm a Volunteer Ambassador Mortgage-free Glee! Name Dropper
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    Go girl, go :grin:
    Nowt to loose.
    Watching Yorksire Housing on 5. :eek:
    I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.

    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.     ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.
  • Butti
    Butti Posts: 5,014 Forumite
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    Butti wrote: »
    Been to see my Dad on Planet Dad...what a surreal and bizarre place it is. Come away thinking what a bizarre man he is and how the complete lack of communication skills between him and his parents is still like ricocheting around like an unexploded bomb affecting all of us. It's like his reality completely ignores how he is with other people. Has made me laugh a bit.

    See, when trying to understand my mental outlook really I just needed to have a look back through my diary! This seems a very apt description from 2013!
    Debt LBM (08/09) £11,641. DEBT FREE APRIL 2021.
    Diary 'Butti's journey : A matter of loaf or death'.
    Diary 2 'The whimsical tale of the Waterbed of Debt'         48% off mortgage
    'one day I will be rich and famous…for now I'll just have to settle for being poor and incredibly sexy'. Vimrod Member of MIKE'S :cool: MOB
  • ZTD
    ZTD Posts: 24,327 Forumite
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    Butti wrote: »
    "Do not seek for conscious awareness where there is none".

    What is "conscious awareness" mean in this context?
    "Follow the money!" - Deepthroat (AKA William Mark Felt Sr - Associate Director of the FBI)
    "We were born and raised in a summer haze." Adele 'Someone like you.'
    "Blowing your mind, 'cause you know what you'll find, when you're looking for things in the sky."     OMD 'Julia's Song'
  • Butti
    Butti Posts: 5,014 Forumite
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    beanielou wrote: »
    Go girl, go :grin:
    Nowt to loose.
    Watching Yorksire Housing on 5. :eek:

    Are they trying to flush bags of nappies down the loo in Yorkshire Beanie? I'd like to think other professionals suffer too!!
    Debt LBM (08/09) £11,641. DEBT FREE APRIL 2021.
    Diary 'Butti's journey : A matter of loaf or death'.
    Diary 2 'The whimsical tale of the Waterbed of Debt'         48% off mortgage
    'one day I will be rich and famous…for now I'll just have to settle for being poor and incredibly sexy'. Vimrod Member of MIKE'S :cool: MOB
  • Butti
    Butti Posts: 5,014 Forumite
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    ZTD wrote: »
    What is "conscious awareness" mean in this context?

    So some people with personality disorders or narcissism are exactly aware of how they provoke other people. They feel momentarily better when they have made you feel worse or provoked a reaction from you. Some it seems are not, they just provoke you but not intentionally.

    It's about just being okay with yourself, not looking for answers in other people.
    Debt LBM (08/09) £11,641. DEBT FREE APRIL 2021.
    Diary 'Butti's journey : A matter of loaf or death'.
    Diary 2 'The whimsical tale of the Waterbed of Debt'         48% off mortgage
    'one day I will be rich and famous…for now I'll just have to settle for being poor and incredibly sexy'. Vimrod Member of MIKE'S :cool: MOB
  • beanielou
    beanielou Posts: 90,270 Ambassador
    Academoney Grad I'm a Volunteer Ambassador Mortgage-free Glee! Name Dropper
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    Some of the bahavior is dire Butti.
    Some is sad & some is mind boggling.
    One family appeared to get a brand new house after telling lies & dont even live in it. :mad: :mad:
    I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.

    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.
    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.     ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.
  • ZTD
    ZTD Posts: 24,327 Forumite
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    Butti wrote: »
    So some people with personality disorders or narcissism are exactly aware of how they provoke other people. They feel momentarily better when they have made you feel worse or provoked a reaction from you. Some it seems are not, they just provoke you but not intentionally.

    Ah right - the difference between worky tickets and dicks.
    Butti wrote: »
    It's about just being okay with yourself, not looking for answers in other people.

    Or introverts as we like to call ourselves... ;) :rotfl:
    "Follow the money!" - Deepthroat (AKA William Mark Felt Sr - Associate Director of the FBI)
    "We were born and raised in a summer haze." Adele 'Someone like you.'
    "Blowing your mind, 'cause you know what you'll find, when you're looking for things in the sky."     OMD 'Julia's Song'
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