Free guide from Refuge for women experiencing domestic violence

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Comments

  • :A I work in this field and was about to post a simalar reply however you have worded the points about the gender issue with domestic abuse perfectly.
    As an aside this guide would be useful for both men and women in that situation.
  • I too work in this field for Women's Aid and they also offer free advice including money management in their Survivor's Handbook. It is available in different languages and also audio. http://www.womensaid.org.uk/domestic-violence-survivors-handbook.asp?section=0001000100080001&itemTitle=The+Survivor%27s+Handbook

    The website also provides a link for children and young people who live with domestic abuse offering online support - http://www.thehideout.org.uk/default.aspa

    Domestic abuse is unacceptable under any circumstances regardless of the gender of the target or the gender of the perpetrator. Unfortunately it has been made more difficult for genuine male targets of domestic violence and abuse (gay or straight) to access appropriate support because some groups who claim to offer support and advice specifically for men have links with known perpetrators of domestic abuse.

    If you are a male target of domestic abuse you can access gender specific support from the following website which has no hidden agenda, has the support of the Home Office and is managed by Respect http://www.mensadviceline.org.uk/
    Domestic Violence and Abuse 24hr freephone helpline for FEMALE TARGETS - 0808 2000 247.

    For MALE TARGETS - 0808 801 0327.

    Free legal advice on WOMEN'S RIGHTS - 020 7251 6577.
    PM me for further support / links to websites.
  • Rabbitx
    Rabbitx Posts: 310 Forumite
    Excellent, I like the fact that the site tells you how to cover your tracks on-line. I hope that helps to give assurance to people looking for advice, but afraid of being caught doing so. :T
  • Rabbitx
    Rabbitx Posts: 310 Forumite
    I know bumping is not generally the correct thing to do in these forums, but I hope you'll agree this subject should be an exception to the rule.
    I frequently re-live my past, and am sure many of you do. If the excellent advice and links on the thread can help just one person, it has got to be worth it.
    Looking at the number of views this has had so far, I'm hopeful that this is helping a whole load of people.
    Thanks Wendy for starting the thread. :A
  • yoni_one
    yoni_one Posts: 590 Forumite
    Women can access free confidential legal advice from women lawyers from the organisation Rights of Women on: 020 7251 6577 (telephone) or 020 7490 2562 (textphone) on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, 2-4pm and 7-9pm and Fridays, 12noon-2pm.

    Details on www.row.org.uk
    Domestic Violence and Abuse 24hr freephone helpline for FEMALE TARGETS - 0808 2000 247.

    For MALE TARGETS - 0808 801 0327.

    Free legal advice on WOMEN'S RIGHTS - 020 7251 6577.
    PM me for further support / links to websites.
  • angelpye
    angelpye Posts: 995
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Forumite
    Hi, just found this thread and I have to say as someone who has a lot of experience personally and professionally as well as through study and qualifications, I personally find the mankind website disturbing.

    I have spoken with many professionals who work with victims of domestic violence and none that I know recommend this organisation, including people who work for male domestic violence organisations. Their statistics are blantantly edited and provide an unrealistic view of what is going on.

    I came across their leaflets 18 mths ago and it was using statistics that made it look as though more children were subject to a child protection plan (on the 'at risk' register) because they lived with their mothers - the fact is I work with child protection and of those that are domestic violence cases( which is a very high percentage of cases) I would say over 99% are male onto female violence and abuse.

    Mothers who experience abuse often find it difficult to function properly because of the trauma they are made to experience daily - they often feel powerless and scared of losing their children. These children are then subject to plans because of the actions of the other parent and it is the mother who is made to do all the work to protect and repair the children. This organisation did not include that in their propergander.

    Women's Aid and Refuge affiliated organisations never ignore that it happens to men, they merely state that it is gender biased towards female victims. Domestic violence is about power and control so comes in many forms and has many consequences.

    It just shows really that you have to be careful with some of the recommendations made. The general concensus is to recommend Mens Advice Line who are thought to be a respected organisation.

    I have ranted but felt strongly about this. Can I ask - the person who recommended Mankind - do you work for them?
    Happiness is wanting what you have...
    Debt Jan 2017: £2589.22 DFD: [STRIKE]Sept 2022[/STRIKE] April 2022 but this Marching Minimalist can beat that!
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  • yoni_one
    yoni_one Posts: 590 Forumite
    Yes, there are irresponsible organisations out there who claim to support male victims of DVA yet are known to have strong links with male perpetrators of DVA.

    The agency Women's Aid signpost people to is Mens Advice Line.

    The link is in my previous post on this thread.
    Domestic Violence and Abuse 24hr freephone helpline for FEMALE TARGETS - 0808 2000 247.

    For MALE TARGETS - 0808 801 0327.

    Free legal advice on WOMEN'S RIGHTS - 020 7251 6577.
    PM me for further support / links to websites.
  • zita
    zita Posts: 33 Forumite
    edited 7 May 2009 at 4:16PM
    I just would like to say that its great to see Domestic Violence awareness.

    I escaped DV 6 years ago with my then 3 year old daughter. We left out home with a bag of clothes and went into a refuge runned by Womens Aid. Although it was very difficult to adapt it was the best thing that could have happen to us. We were re housed about 15 months later and had to start from scratch but we did it. I got furniture from a local charity, looked for free to colector stuff from the local newspaper and slowly built up a home.

    If you have an escape fund all the better but sometimes the situation you are in is so bad you just need to escape.

    I just hope that people out there male or female that are caught in a Domestic Violence situation dont give up on escaping due to financial issues. At the end of the day your life and well being its priceless, everything else can be replaced.
  • Im happy that women can rely their problem regarding domestic violence.sometimes poverty is the no. 1 factor why couples encounter this problem, sometimes personal matter.
  • i,ve been in a dv relationship once and it took me yrs to get away, i was so happy till i met this man who was so sweet till he got me in his grasp now i,m suffering again, never will i trust anyone again this has really knocked me for six, seems like i,m not meant to be happy i guess
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