The Plan

wishingthemortgaheaway wrote: »

Congratulations on your new arrival.

One of the things that saved me in the early days was a sling. I went to a sling library and got fitted and taught properly. There is nothing better than hands free sling snuggles.

Hiring from a library is very mse as you cAn try lots of different types before you commit to buying.
They will also fit you and baby properly following all the ticks guidelines (no crotch dangling, narrow based carriers)

It has saved my sanity on more times than I can remember over the last 18 months.

Thats a good idea, I'll look into a sling library. I bought a wilkinet sling on recommendation for £5 total cost from ebay which works for me but DH finds it quite uncomfortable on the shoulders.

I was thinking we could do with finding another one but loathe to spend money on something and it not work out. especially want to get another before our holiday to northumbria where we hope to be out and about a lot and not in places which are particularly pram friendly.

DS had a very fretful day yesterday but today has been asleep for the last few hours, he got himself off to sleep rather than needing to be rocked for the first time ever...I havent known what to do with myself. I hope this is the start of a routine but I wont hold my breath:D
Im alert for him waking up so will get this finished quick.
We have withdrawn some matched betting funds of £500 and made an additional overpayment of £300. £200 has been used to cover the overspend in DS category (still learning) and DH category (my birthday present was not saved up for:o) and also as mentioned previously struggling with sticking to the food budget.

Paid today so the budget for feb is as follows:
Fixed costs:
Tv licence 12.12
C tax 118
Energy 60.00
Mortgage 556
HP 45
Home Ins 19
Life ins 22
Water 38.5
BBand 19
fees 18.00

Variable:
Food 220
Parking 10
Fuel 80
Pets 150
Car Maint 100
Home maint 20
Misc 10
Own £150 each
Mortgage Overpayment 500
Cash savings 120

We have been paid more than this but I worked out this would be what we would have if we split out the maternity pay evenly across the 12 months. Anything paid over this is put into a separate saving account to top up the income when the maternity pay runs out.

The eagle eyed of you may notice that there is nothing in a category for DS. I am hoping to cover his expenses with child benefit which I have already started getting but as previously Im still learning so I may not be able to. I will be going to mother and baby groups which can get quite pricey but they seem to help with my low mood so I'll stick with them for the time being.

I am expecting my £40 from Onepoll soon also, this should go to the mortgage. I dont anticipate getting anything from matched betting this month.

Other targets:
No clothes: still just leggings and giant pants for post natal wear
No cosmetics: On track as only spent advantage card points. However they have all gone now so this will not last until target date of November

TwentySomethingGirl wrote: »

Hi Scrimps

I hope you're doing well with your little boy. Mine will go to bed at night without rocking but not naps. We're still working on a day time routine, might be a bit early yet though. I've not tried any groups yet, I did think abut going to one because I was feeling a bit down, lonely and bored but I've not braved it yet. I'm with you on the giant pants!:rotfl:

Sorry I missed this, I havent been logging in to update. We're getting on better, we had quite a few issues with colic but he seems happier now, still screams a lot but i hear thats what babies do:o

He sleeps really well at night but does get cuddled a lot, I have to make sure he is fast asleep before I put him on his back otherwise he will just wake back up again, he seems to get a fair amount of reflux which is settling down also but he is not yet over. He will sleep really well and settle immediately on his front but obviously I dont want to do that so am sticking with the cuddlng to sleep for now so I can lay him on his back, we co sleep a lot also. He does not like sleeping during the day at all, I also was a bit clueless about how much encouragement babies need to sleep during the day.

I thought it kind of just happened if you were fairly quiet :rotfl: He will keep going and going until he is exhausted, then the screaming/crying starts because he is so tired by about 5pm and then eventually falls asleep and only wakes a few times for a feed overnight until 5am. We have got a bit better with daytime naps but not much, sometimes we think we have cracked it with a particular routine of pushing in the pram, or driving round in the car etc then , the next time I try it, he steadfastly stays awake.

I hear you on the lonliness and boredom. I have been going to groups and would encourage you to brave it, all the other mums are there for the same reason and want someone to talk to and go for coffee with. I have found the ones I chose a bit pricey and its more for me than the boy but i would be less happy if I didnt go. Contrary to the 'competitive mum' thing you hear I find that everyone tends to talk about how shocked they are by how difficult it is, how lonely and bored they can feel if they dont get out, they also want to check that other peoples babies cry too and do poonamis etc and they also want to make some friends who have children because their current friends either a.> dont have kids or b.> have kids that are older.

Im guessing the competitive mum bit will come as the babies get older. If you find a group where people arnt very inclusive just find another group.

I also go to a 'postnatal low mood' group therapy which just started last week, i was refered by my CBT counsellor. It was very helpful to hear that everyone is in the same boat, looking at the titles of the next sessions it basically says work on putting yourself up the pecking order, try and carve some time out for yourself and let go of the guilt that seems to be born at the same time as the baby. I find talking to people difficult and get very anxious in social situations (see CBT) so I get that its difficult to brave the groups, but it is worth it.

Sorry, went on a bit there! Happens a lot:rotfl: