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The Garden Fence - proper Old Style support and chat!

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  • mardatha
    mardatha Posts: 15,612 Forumite
    I like doing plain good food, soups and meat and two veg. Workers food, not banquets.
    Very tired and weary tonight, was out getting my hair done and first the down bus was late so I got there half an hour late. Then there was another lady being done so I had to wait. Then I just missed the up bus and had to sit in a freezing bus station for an hour until the next one. Nearly bedtime thank god :D
  • nursemaggie
    nursemaggie Posts: 2,608
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    polly I have not asked him to look after me. I hope I can mange my self until the time comes to go into a Hospice. I just need to to understand there will come a time when I cannot even get him a sandwich. While we are such a long in time from his work he would not cope with getting dinner never mind doing anything else in the house. On Christmas Eve he did not get home until 5 pm.

    How can anyone after a 10 hour shift and 15 hours out of home, having last eaten at 8 am get himself a dinner eat it and get to bed in an hour.

    If we move to Farnworth it will be half an hour even on a push bike. He may come home as early as 11 am some mornings. He will not have to get up until 4 am. We may sit down for dinner as early as mid day.

    He would have liked to buy the house we saw on Sunday. It was only £150,000. We could have raked up a 10% deposit between us but there is no way ether of us could have got a mortgage. We would have struggled to get to the end of the month.
  • ivyleaf
    ivyleaf Posts: 6,431
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    nm Are the staff able to buy any goods where they work? i understand your DS works in a warehouse, but I know that some places like that have a staff shop. I wondered if he might be able to buy an occasional "ready meal" to give you a break from having to cook for him to a strict timetable. Aldi don't sell a vast selection of those, but they do sell some. Alternatively a canned meal would take only a few minutes for him to heat in the microwave or a saucepan. He certainly shouldn't be shouting at you if his dinner isn't on the table! People who work long hours and live alone have to shift for themselves when they get home, after all. xx
  • nursemaggie
    nursemaggie Posts: 2,608
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    The big problem is just how many calories they use because they are basically doing a massive workout often for 9 or 10 hours a day. He has breakfast about 2. 45 am. He has a bowl of cereal at that time. He then sets off walking for 40 minutes. Bolton probably does not have more than a few square feet of flatness in the whole town so he does down and up and down and up all the way to the bus station. He gets a mini bus at 4 am to work.

    He gets a 20 minute break at 8 am. He has had 5 hours of mostly working physically. He says lots of them could eat a large two course dinner at that time. They have a choice of a sandwich or a tiny ready meal. Sometimes the machines are nearly empty. He will then work until they finish plus he has 2 and 1/2 hours to get home.

    He will have worked on a small meal for up to 8 hours. I can understand how hungry he feels 8 hours from a light meal until dinner and it is not always possible to get it ready in time. He may have had one of their microwave meals at 8 am. He will not take a meal with him mainly because he would not have time to heat it and eat it. 20 minutes is not a very long.

    There is an Aldi shop on Logistics North. I gather it is about 10 minutes
    walk from the warehouse. Sometimes he gets a lift he only goes to the shop he will miss his lift. If I ask him to bring something home I have to wait a few days. I can understand he want a lift if he can get one. They just drop him near the bus stop. They are going that way anyway.

    I cannot think of anything that comes in a can he would like except beans. I understand the thing about those who live alone fending for himself but they don't take two and half hours to get home. No one else who works there lives this side of town. Those who don't have transport can have the Local Link from home. It is not allowed over here because we are almost in the richest suburb of the town.

    No one who lives over this side of town applies for a job that side of the town. He is the only one out of a staff of over 500 who lives this side of town.

    Having a flat makes it worse because we have no where for him to store a bike. If he bought one it would get pinched the first night. If it was not the housing association would take it and take it too the tip. I lost my bike that way when we lived in Sussex.

    I have to leave him a microwave meal when I have a hospital appointment.
  • Softstuff
    Softstuff Posts: 3,086
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    I'm sorry to hear you still aren't feeling too good Softstuff . Are you managing better sleep yet ? All I can say is the longest journey starts with a single step ( sorry )
    I miss waking in the morning to the banter between yourself and monna while we all slept . Between you not feeling too good and poor monna being run ragged by Millie the Minx i suppose it will be a while before those chats resume .
    polly
    Thanks for asking, the sleep is improved in that I think I'm breathing mostly through it and sleeping correctly on my side, but I'm not getting much of it by time or much quality to it (my fitbit tracks it seemingly very well) and I ache like billy-o when I get up :rotfl: I'm working on everything I can to improve "sleep hygiene" as they call it (no caffeine after lunch, eating a bit sooner, losing weight, no screen time before bed, relaxing sooner, earlier set bed times). I've purchased a new pillow, which though extortionately priced, seems worth it. I'm looking into cooling the bed directly and will be in a completely dark new room soon. In short, if it can be fixed, I'll fix it. Just a bit miffed with it all. I realise others have bigger worries though and I'll perk up in due course :o
    Softstuff- Officially better than 007
  • monnagran
    monnagran Posts: 5,284
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    Softstuff, I'm sorry you are still having problems sleeping. I depend on the hound to wake me up these days and that depends on the state of her bladder. It could be once every couple of hours or only twice a night.
    When it was me waking myself up I was happy to turn to tablet for company and to pass the time, but being woken up to escort an excited dog downstairs, usher her out of the door and then try to entice her back in changes things. When I've finally convinced her that it is not play time I can't wait to get back into my warm bed and back to sleep.

    As to those pesky height/weight tables, ignore them. They take no account of body build, genetics or past history.
    I was discussing this with a friend only a couple of weeks ago. She had been to the hospital where they had told her what she should weigh and offered her a diet sheet. She said that she had actually weighed that once, when she was in her early 20s, in hospital being treated for anorexia and very close to death.
    Just be sensible and concentrate on "healthy" rather than "slimming".

    nm. You are absolutely right, you don't stand outside your house admiring its appearance. As long as it has everything you need inside and you can be comfortable and peaceful it will be fine.

    It's too early for me to have done anything worthy of reporting so I'll just leave you with

    THOUGHT FOR TODAY

    In order to insult me, I must first value your opinion. Nice try though.
    I believe that friends are quiet angels
    Who lift us to our feet when our wings
    Have trouble remembering how to fly.
  • fuddle
    fuddle Posts: 6,823 Forumite
    mardatha wrote: »
    Fuddle and anybody else interested in nutrition and/or old fashioned eating - take a read at this, it's fascinating:
    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2672390/

    So interesting. It makes so much sense as well. We're definitely a victim of our success, gorging on all we want whenever we want.

    I was reading that we shouldn't really indulge in fruit out of season because it's not what nature intends. Some people rest off eating eggs in the winter because chickens naturally produce less then. I often wonder about the Ploughman's lunch and how it sustained hard grafters. Here's me stuffing full my desk sitting/driving husband full of meats etc because he's had a long day. :(

    Can I ask a Q for asthmatics? When you've had an attack and on steroids do you bring up a lot of sticky stuff from your chest afterwards? I'm just trying to learn about asthma and attacks. I'm still a bit confused with my bit self. I've been having short bursts of chest tightness that I try not to panic about and take my inhaler. I soon come round but that mixed with anxiety and I react badly to steroids I don't know what's normal and what's not. I slept all night though and feel much clearer chest wise this morning.

    That said please can I beg of you positive thoughts for the next 3 hours or so? We're taking the caravan to its new permanent home in SW Scotland. It's going on a small holiday site - lochs, forest, swimming pool and pub :D We're anxious tourers who hate the caravan on the back and we're doing that right now! What makes it worse is the last time we had the caravan on tow we broke down North of Glasgow and needed the AA to bring us, car and caravan back to Durham. The cars fault was never found. :eek:
  • ivyleaf
    ivyleaf Posts: 6,431
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    edited 10 March 2018 at 8:36AM
    Morning everyone!

    nursemaggie
    , oh goodness, I understand now what a huge problem it is for him, calorie-wise. Does he take any snacks with him to eat on his way home, to take the edge off his hunger and raise his blood sugar a bit? I find a Mars bar is particularly helpful if i'm out and about and realise I'm becoming too exhausted to get home safely. I do realise he would need more than that. xx

    Softstuff Sorry you're not quite there yet with the good sleep xx

    monnagran
    My sister-in-law was having a check=up once and the nurse told her she was overweight. She pointed out that she was six feet tall and a perfect size 12, how could she be overweight? but the nurse ignored the evidence of her own eyes and insisted SIL was definitely overweight. It turned out the scales were broken....

    Ooh fuddle, just seen your post. Wishing you well on your journey there and back. It sounds a gorgeous place to have a caravan :j
  • Floss
    Floss Posts: 8,188
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    Fuds am praying to the God that is Airstream for safe travelling for you & your van :D
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  • camelot1001
    camelot1001 Posts: 5,987
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    Hope your travels are going well fuddle, it's a horrible wet day to be travelling.

    nm - I appreciate your DS works a long way from home but he must realise that his job may not be forever and could find another position in a different area at some time. Maybe a food flask could be of use to him and a stack of sandwiches that he could make up the night before?

    What would your DS do if you weren't around to look after him so well? He would have to work, shop and look after a home himself, something that many, many people have to do whilst working long hours. I hope you find a suitable solution.

    You are certainly throwing everything at the sleep problem softstuff, one of my friends sewed a tennis ball to the back of her OHs pjs so that he wouldn't roll over onto his back!
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