deed of variation?

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  • theoretica
    theoretica Posts: 12,303 Forumite
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    We don't know the sums involved or what your financial situation is until you get your inheritance, but a fight over the will will cost you in solicitor's fees and may significantly delay payout from the estate. The solicitor may have been taking this into account when mentioning a deed of variation.
    But a banker, engaged at enormous expense,
    Had the whole of their cash in his care.
    Lewis Carroll
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    orwen wrote: »
    My parent suddenly passed away & I was their carer.

    My parent made their final will 2 years ago when they were fit & healthy, we both thought they'd live on for at least 5, 7 or even another 10 years.

    Of siblings, I received the more in the will, perhaps unsurprisingly since I was my parent's sole carer.

    Could it be that your sibling feels that you were left a larger proportion because your parents expected you to be caring for them for some years to come and, as that hasn't happened, you haven't 'earned' all the extra amount?

    Sometimes, it's easier to handle a situation if you can understand why the other person is reacting the way they are.

    I can't see on what grounds the will could be contested but, if your sibling is going to waste money on trying, it could be cheaper for you to come to some agreement - but don't feel forced into it.

    If your sibling had given up his life to care for your parents and consequently benefited from the will, would he be offering to hand over some of his inheritance to you?
  • DandelionPatrol
    DandelionPatrol Posts: 1,313 Forumite
    Mojisola wrote: »
    And find a new solicitor.
    I agree with this. If you do not trust the solicitor, then cut them loose.

    As another poster has suggested, they may be proposing what they see as the cheapest solution for you. But really they should be setting all the possibilities before you, explaining them and letting you make the choice.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    DandelionPatrol wrote: »
    As another poster has suggested, they may be proposing what they see as the cheapest solution for you.

    And the easiest solution from the solicitor's point of view. :(

    Handling family arguments over wills can't be many solicitors' favourite job.
  • orwen
    orwen Posts: 219 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    And the easiest solution from the solicitor's point of view. :(

    Handling family arguments over wills can't be many solicitors' favourite job.

    This is the impression I am getting but I have then been bamboozled I feel - before I paid the new solicitor they were insisting they could rebuff the opposing solicitor's letter to me 'no problem'. After I said OK and paid them all they come up with is 'What about a variation order then?'. Why didn't they mention that at the initial meeting which went on for over an hour? Not once did they mention varying my parent's will. I didn't know this was an option anyway. Now I'm wondering how much they will be expecting me to 'reasonably' give away? My parent was extremely concerned that I would cope financially if disaster struck - unfortunately it did - my parent would be most unhappy if they thought I was going to potentially suffer due to coercion from relatives - that means bullying - and laissez faire from a solicitor - that means appeasement :-|
  • missbiggles1
    missbiggles1 Posts: 17,481 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    And the easiest solution from the solicitor's point of view. :(

    Handling family arguments over wills can't be many solicitors' favourite job.

    Really? I would've thought they'd be pleased to have a nice little earner.
  • orwen
    orwen Posts: 219 Forumite
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    theoretica wrote: »
    We don't know the sums involved or what your financial situation is until you get your inheritance, but a fight over the will will cost you in solicitor's fees and may significantly delay payout from the estate. The solicitor may have been taking this into account when mentioning a deed of variation.

    These are my thoughts also. The will was read and probate granted. But look what I'm left to contend with. If the solicitor says pay out X amount I am then left with the decision not to pay out X but gamble that going to court will cost X which I'd lose anyway - through fees - but I ought to win the case, because the will is sound. I didn't expect to be plunged into such a quandary, I've only been with the new solicitor for something like a couple of weeks. How dare they leave me in this state of mind over a weekend like this, they've mentioned a variation order twice to me now with no other details at all, leaving me to go potentially out of my mind with worry. MInd you, if I did lose my mind and was committed by 9am Monday I suppose that's also 'job done' for them, they've had the initial payment. I apologise if this matter is making something me less than uncynical but there it is at the moment.
  • Yorkshireman99
    Yorkshireman99 Posts: 5,470 Forumite
    orwen wrote: »
    These are my thoughts also. The will was read and probate granted. But look what I'm left to contend with. If the solicitor says pay out X amount I am then left with the decision not to pay out X but gamble that going to court will cost X which I'd lose anyway - through fees - but I ought to win the case, because the will is sound. I didn't expect to be plunged into such a quandary, I've only been with the new solicitor for something like a couple of weeks. How dare they leave me in this state of mind over a weekend like this, they've mentioned a variation order twice to me now with no other details at all, leaving me to go potentially out of my mind with worry. MInd you, if I did lose my mind and was committed by 9am Monday I suppose that's also 'job done' for them, they've had the initial payment. I apologise if this matter is making something me less than uncynical but there it is at the moment.
    I am convinced the unhappy beneficiaries are bluffing.
  • orwen
    orwen Posts: 219 Forumite
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    DandelionPatrol wrote: »
    I agree with this. If you do not trust the solicitor, then cut them loose.

    As another poster has suggested, they may be proposing what they see as the cheapest solution for you. But really they should be setting all the possibilities before you, explaining them and letting you make the choice.

    This is exactly how they have left me - I have been dealing with three people there, two on the phone and one by email / letter. They have explained nothing to me, they just keep asking me have I considered varying the will? That's all I get - no advice, no examples, no sums involved, nothing. :(

    And I wonder to what extent varying the will is honouring the parent's intention, their last wishes - irrespective of sums involved? The solicitor has left me between a rock & a hard place.

    Monday I get a 2nd opinion from the original solicitor, that's all I can do.
  • orwen
    orwen Posts: 219 Forumite
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    Yorkshireman99 wrote: »
    I am convinced the unhappy beneficiaries are bluffing.

    That's what the family solicitor said - the new solicitor is all for appeasement though it seems, this may be a disastrous mistake I feel :-|
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