Frump to Fab 2018 - Fabulous Dahhhhlings

Just back from a nice meal with the boys and DIL for DS2s birthday tomorrow. His girl is a nurse who had to work tonight so she couldn't make it. The boys have gone on to see the Avengers film. Some nice brother bonding time.

SUgarbaby we don't buy big presents either. We tend to go out and celebrate instead so big brother is treating baby brother to the film and meal.

I managed to find an Avengers book for him and one of those on the go drink cups where you add fresh fruit so you can have flavoured water without all the sweeteners and chemicals. He's trying very hard to eat healthily and it isn't always easy when you are at work or out and about so I thought the cup thing was just the ticket. I didn't spend much but he was chuffed to bits with both presents. You are right, it's not how much you spend is it, but the thought that goes in to the gift. I do try and target the presents to each person. I try and find something that will surprise and delight them.

I try to think ahead for gifts and often buy months in advance if I see the right present or I make a note in my diary of what to buy when I get inspired. It takes a lot of the pressure off and stops last minute panic buying. And of course in true MSE fashion it can work out cheaper too. No last minute wildy expensive useless tat. :rotfl:

Sounds like you bought yourself some nice presents too.;)

Back to the manners thing.......

I once read somewhere that the true definition of good manners is not when someone says "oh so and so has good manners, but rather that they say so and so is a nice person". I suppose meaning that true good manners have nothing to do with etiquette as such but rather it is about showing consideration for others. Not letting a door slam in someone's face, not letting them down at the last minute without the courtesy of a phone call, that kind of thing.

Now I know this next remark might be a bit contentious but I do think it a very sad state of affairs when perfectly fit healthy young people do not give up their seat for heavily pregnant women, or people carrying a child in their arms (men or women) or frail elderly seniors.

My daughter in law is now on maternity leave but she was telling me how she struggled on the train some days. Loads of strapping young men who remained seated and would just look the other way whilst she had to stand.

Yes I know Some men will spout "well you wanted equality, now youve got it so stop complaining" but surely it wouldnt kill them to give up their seat for a heavily pregnant woman or someone struggling to hold a baby or toddler, or an elderly person who is a bit wobbly on their pins. I notice that is often women who give up their seat in these circumstances whilst men pretend they haven't noticed.

But the worst was when I took my father to Belgium. I have never experienced such a truly embarrassing incident. I ended up publically shaming two er hem "gentlemen" on a train.

We had reserved seats for our party of 4 and these two smartly dressed businessmen had plonked themselves in our seats, spreading themselves out with their laptops, briefcases and coats so no one else could sit there.

I politely asked them if we could have our seats which we had reserved. They were extremely rude and said no we should find somewhere else to sit.....the train was of course busy and it would mean us having to separate.

My father was in a wheelchair by this stage but he could walk down the length of the carriage with assistance and sit in a normal seat. My sister and niece had folded his chair and were attending to the luggage whilst I had helped him down the carriage and was trying to get him to his seat. These men could see my father was elderly and frail but they refused to budge.

It took me several minutes and a rather embarrassing "discussion" to get them to move. They eventually did but only after I had torn a strip off them.

I pointed out the obvious,, we had paid to reserve those seats, they had not. Still they kept arguing. Eventually I raised my voice and in clear stentorian tones so the whole carriage could hear, I said "take a good look at my father, he is 89 and rather frail, he is exhausted, he needs to sit down now so I suggest you move immediately before he collapses and we have to delay the train whilst we fetch the paramedics".

By this time all the other passengers had stopped pretending they couldn't see what was happening and began tut tutting and muttering that the men should move and give the seat to my father, but still they kept arguing.

I could see my fathers eyes were filling with tears, he felt humiliated and embarrassed. At this point I saw red.

I said to these men, "well gentlemen I hope you feel proud of yourselves, you have reduced an 89 year old veteran who gave nine years of his life in service to his country to tears. Is this how your mothers brought you up. I bet it isn't, I bet they would be ashamed of you, if they could see you now".

The men blushed furiously and muttering and cursing me they flounced off and found other seats. The whole Carriage erupted into applause and cheers. Even my dad had to smile. The "gentlemen" in question realised they were no longer welcome in that carriage so they headed off further down the train. :rotfl:

I wouldn't normally dream of causing a scene like that but I couldn't let that kind of behaviour go unchallenged. They were just bullies who thought they could intimidate a middle aged woman and a sick old man.

Well they picked the wrong middle aged woman.;)

I became quite the heroine that day, people kept coming up to us, congratulating me for making a stand, making a fuss of my dad and thanking him for his service to his country.

At first my poor niece was squirming with embarrassment .....you know what 15 year olds are like .......but eventually even she said "Aunty I'm proud of you, you stood up to those horrible bullies. I bet they'll think twice next time". I Hope she was right and that they learned a lesson in manners that day.

Shanks......pale and interesting is good. Technically a tanned skin is a damaged skin. Knowing what I know now I would not have spent my teens and early twenties basting myself to a golden brown. :rotfl:

Hindsight is a wonderful thing.;).

There's quite a few things I would do differently if I had my time again. However, we can't turn back the clock so I just have to make the best with what I do have. Thankfully I have been very lucky and my skin, although showing the inevitable signs of aging, does not have that leathery crocodile look that you see in ardent sun worshippers. I think not smoking has also helped. I am quite happy now to cheat and use self tanner so as to try and not cause further sun damage.

Well I've done all my paperwork and form filling ready for tomorrow. Just have to double check it all later today. So this morning I'm going to have a nice pamper session.....mani & pedi, face mask and a lovely long soak in the bath.

Btw. One of the things I am really pleased about is that I will have room in my new house for a dedicated space for a mini gym. Luckily I already have most of the equipment. I just need to get a treadmill, a second hand one will be fine so I won't have to break the bank to kit it out. Maybe a rowing machine, although I'm not sure if my knees would cope. I was thinking I could get a personal trainer for a couple of sessions to come and advise me.

I have decided that, for a touch of luxury and decadence, I am also going to treat myself to a small portable infrared home sauna. Actually it will be great for my aches and pains so not quite as frivolous at it sounds.

Oddly enough although I loathe going to a public gym (all that bacteria from other peoples sweaty bodies - ugh) I am more than happy to work out at home, so I know my mini gym will get regular use.

In our old family home we converted the garage into a home gym and we all used it every day. We used it for years. Even when my husband got sick and could barely stand, the carers and I used to help him onto the equipment. Daily exercise did keep him mobile for longer than expected, although of course his illness did eventually rob him of the ability to walk, but even then he still did what he could. Even wheelchair users benefit from exercise.

But for us, daily exercise is a must, and for me it's a case of "If Mohamid won't go the mountain, then the mountain must go to Mohamid". I won't go to a gym so the gym has to come to me.:rotfl:

In the time it would take to travel to and from the gym I can do my workout and get showered, so time efficient and cost efficient too. Win-win.

We had a storm here last night. Luckily I had staked up some vulnerable plants yesterday afternoon, so no damage done. Still rather dull, maybe the sun will show its face later.

Enjoy the rest of the bank holiday. And....keeeeep fabbing.