Mooloo's Joining up the dots in 2017

24567…133

Comments

  • Feral_Moon
    Feral_Moon Posts: 2,943 Forumite
    Mooloo wrote: »
    Not sure if I can change the title now?
    I will have to ask if anyone knows how to. For now I will leave it.
    There are a lot of dots to join. I wish I could say it would be straight forward but looking at my life so far I very much doubt it.
    For today, it is our last day before BF goes to work and I get dgd back. the sun is shining and we're going to walk into oxford centre. I need some exercise after a week of very little walking with my Mum and lots of good food.

    You can, go into edit as normal the click on "go advanced mode" and the title will be in a white box at the top. You can change it there x
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Rampant Recycler
    Yah done it. Thankyou.
    Walked into Oxford today and bought myself some gloves and socks. We had lunch in an all you can eat Place. So we won't be eating again today!
    I have been working on the accounts this afternoon and my Brother has Skyped me from France.
    He said Mum was so happy with the holiday and that I should be looking at getting another one booked for her for Next Christmas.
    I don't think I am quite ready to commit to another one yet. I think I need to work on the new dynamics of the split homes living with BF at the moment.
    I am already going away in two weeks for a long weekend to Portugal and dgd and I are away there again in April.

    I am going to do some target figure work based on last years sales etc and think about the lessons I have been planning to do and how I am going to advertise them.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Savvy_Sue
    Savvy_Sue Posts: 46,014 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    Mooloo wrote: »
    and my Brother has Skyped me from France.
    He said Mum was so happy with the holiday and that I should be looking at getting another one booked for her for Next Christmas.
    I don't think I am quite ready to commit to another one yet. I think I need to work on the new dynamics of the split homes living with BF at the moment.
    And just why is it YOUR responsibility to sort out your mother's plans for next Christmas?

    Maybe next year she'd like to spend Christmas with your brother. Maybe she'd like to spend it in her own home, inviting you or others.

    And that's before we get on to how YOU would like to spend Christmas!

    Honestly, the cheek of it ...
    Signature removed for peace of mind
  • just_trying
    just_trying Posts: 1,010 Forumite
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post I've been Money Tipped!
    Best wishes mooloo here's to a fab year Xx.
  • dktreesea
    dktreesea Posts: 5,736 Forumite
    Savvy_Sue wrote: »
    And just why is it YOUR responsibility to sort out your mother's plans for next Christmas?

    Maybe next year she'd like to spend Christmas with your brother. Maybe she'd like to spend it in her own home, inviting you or others.

    And that's before we get on to how YOU would like to spend Christmas!

    Honestly, the cheek of it ...



    I kind of agree with this, but I can see the other side too. You're close to your Mum and live nearby. Plus your mum is in good enough health to travel. If you and her enjoy going away together, it's a good thing you are doing making the most of it.


    My own mum, who is a similar age to yours, hasn't been able to travel for years due to ill health, and is now pretty much housebound.
  • Savvy_Sue
    Savvy_Sue Posts: 46,014 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    dktreesea wrote: »
    I kind of agree with this, but I can see the other side too. You're close to your Mum and live nearby. Plus your mum is in good enough health to travel. If you and her enjoy going away together, it's a good thing you are doing making the most of it.


    My own mum, who is a similar age to yours, hasn't been able to travel for years due to ill health, and is now pretty much housebound.
    Oh I get that too, but it's not as if Mooloo's mum isn't in a fit state to make her OWN decisions and express what she'd like to do. Brother saying what he did just comes across to me as HIM deciding he doesn't want to have to have Mum to his for Christmas, but equally doesn't want to feel guilty about not inviting her.
    Signature removed for peace of mind
  • dktreesea
    dktreesea Posts: 5,736 Forumite
    Savvy_Sue wrote: »
    Oh I get that too, but it's not as if Mooloo's mum isn't in a fit state to make her OWN decisions and express what she'd like to do. Brother saying what he did just comes across to me as HIM deciding he doesn't want to have to have Mum to his for Christmas, but equally doesn't want to feel guilty about not inviting her.


    Yes, but that's a far cry from actually going ahead and organising the holiday. The thing is with older people, they often don't have a lot of confidence. Mooloo, correct me if I am wrong on this, but it does sound like your Mum does need some help doing a few things?


    They often can't travel alone. Just not strong enough to lift bags, they can get confused easily, just overwhelmed by being in unfamiliar surroundings. Take something like going to France. Possibly Mooloo's brother would need to come over to England, to his Mum's house, accompany her over to France, then deliver her back at the end of the stay.


    Plus, parents can feel different levels of closeness and trust towards their children. It doesn't follow that just because one of their children is making the invitation, the parents are going to want to go.
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Rampant Recycler
    Mum spends up to three months of the year in France with my siblings.
    I don't think my brother was trying to pass the buck. He was just saying that It would be good to make plans etc, so Mum has plans to look forward to. ( also so that Mum doesn't have to go to my Sister for Christmas as Mum doesn't like the cold weather there, and there is nothing for her to do).
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Rampant Recycler
    After I have been back to work for the month of January and I start to get more work back in, my mission is to start to increase takings and my wages bit by bit. I am hoping that I can up it by £10 a week and increments of £10 each month, if the business can sustain it then I will eventually be on a more suitable wage and ween me off of the benefit system. Obviously I will have to keep hmrc and the council informed as I go along so that I don't end up owning them over payments.
    I suppose that will also keep me focused on the bottom line of the business.

    I will also be back on the debt chasing as I have ended up with more debt this year due to bailing out the kids!
    I obviously am going to have to be very focused and not just coast this year.

    I am looking forward to the challenges that I am planning for my personal and professional growth.

    Dgd is home, presents are opened and she is settling down after a tearful goodbye to her Mum and brother. I noticed that she calls the partner Her step dad now. I will have to just get used to it.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Savvy_sewing
    Savvy_sewing Posts: 11,574 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post Rampant Recycler
    Sons GF is mentally unstable.
    Apparently I am supposed to have reported them to Social and I am now Villan of the century.
    DGDs mum and I have both been on the end of the deranged woman's tongue tonight.
    Happy family not!
    I am currently no longer allowed to be in my grandsons life.
    The woman is totally off her rocker.
    Oh yes I disagree with the way that they live, the less said about it than the better.
    But what bugs me is that I have taken on £2000 of their debt.
    I get up every Saturday and Sunday at 6.30 to get my son to work and I pay for their food shopping every time I take him.
    So why do they believe someone else?
    I would also like to know who that person is that has told them I am to blame.?
    My daughter has also been dragged into it, because I had been honest and said I had told her not to take her baby there as it was a hazard.
    Between us we are now the devil incarnate.
    I can't say who said what, I admitted to telling twin that the place was not very good when she came here two weeks ago and had wanted to go to her brothers. But I don't think that she would ever think of calling social after her asking for help meant she lost dgd.
    I know I am not happy with the mess but I don't think social are the right people to call. Home start, save the children, mencap
    But social services are broken and would not be the first port of call.
    How ever I am feeling betrayed by my son who rang initially to shout at me that some one told them I was initiating the call in the first place.
    I have currently lost my son to this
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
This discussion has been closed.
★ ★ ★ Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 343.1K Banking & Borrowing
  • 250.1K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 449.6K Spending & Discounts
  • 235.2K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 607.8K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 173K Life & Family
  • 247.8K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.9K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards