Advice for an idiot

Steve8181 · 16 September 2018 at 7:49PM

Hi,
I'm. Not sure if anyone has been in the situation I'm in now. I've read through alot of posts, but none are really the same. Basically, in 2008, we changed from owning our house to renting. I was left with loans and credit cards , overdrafts etc, which amounted to quite alot. So we entered into a dmp. So 10 years later I still make the payments to the dmp. However, because a default or dmp only. Lasts for 6 years, we have being able to get credit for the last 4 years. The cost of living where we live is insane, and again I have mounted up credit card debt, and consolidated it (with bad companies at 20 percent Apr) and mounted up more debt on credit cards just to live. How did we live for 4 years? From being supplemented from our parents, we have 2 kids and our parents wouldn't see them suffer. And as soon as we realised we could get credit, we stopped borrowing from them. It's shameful, I am ashamed. But that doesn't change the fact I'm in serious debt, probably 30k, and I'm now at the point that my income doesn't pay the bills and debt combined. I'm. Not currently behind with anything, but that's only cause I've lived off my credit cards for the last 3 months , and all my wages go on the bills.I also gambled a bit to try and win my way out, so so stupid, and just got me into more debt. I would just like to know what the best action to take would be. I don't own anything worth over a couple of hundred quid, and I'm so down I could just curl up and die. Anyone with any proper advice, who's been in this situation, I'd appreciate it. Thankyou... just an idiot 😥

Willing2Learn · 16 September 2018 at 8:17PM

Hi Steve,

You are not an idiot, and you are being harsh on yourself for feeling ashamed.

There a lots of people, many of them couples, who have been in similar circumstances to yourself and have managed to recover the situation, so you are not alone.

First up, you need to post a Statement of Affairs (SOA) so that people can give you meaningful advice. Please use the link below for your SOA, remembering to click on the 'format for MSE' button at the bottom of the form.
http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php

Second, you need to stop being tempted to gamble. The odds are fixed against you making a profit. Accept that and move on.

Edit: And welcome to the forum!

Years_of_debt · 16 September 2018 at 8:41PM

Don’t worry mate I’m in 30k and going bankrupt. Because I have no assets and don’t own my own home then everything is written off for me it’s the best option.
First things first tomorrow you should ring StepChange Charity and be 100% honest (they have heard 200,000 stories) like yours already!

I told them the truth owes 30k no assets. Gambled aload of it and it turns out bankruptcy is the best option for me. They will tell you the best option for you!

Lots of keyboard warriors on here who will give you bad advice & take the mora high ground! So the best thing got should do if you actually want to sort things out is ring StepChange tomorrow and allow a good hour to go through everything.
They will give you 100% best advice and unbiased.

Good luck brother. You’re not alone!

CRH71 · 16 September 2018 at 10:25PM

If, like me, you can't face the hought of speaking to a person about the issue, on the StepChange site is an online tool (Debt Remedy) that will offer recommendations as to the best option for you.

That's what I used, and I'm comfortable with the outcome, after an initial bit of shock. Bankruptcy. Best way forwards for me, and I'm in essentially the same boat as you - years of long term debt due to living expenses, spread over a number of creditors and the final straw that broke the camel's back was the recent introduction of new credit card rules and minimum payments earlier this month.

You're definitely not an idiot if you've got this far with your thinking. An idiot would bury their head in the sand and pretend it isn't happening to them. You're at the stage where you're just beginning to accept that bankruptcy is the best way forwards - it will prove to be. No more creditor pressure, no more hassle, no more robbing Peter to pay Paul. You can breathe a sigh of relief and start living your life again, albeit with a lesson learned.

luvchocolate · 17 September 2018 at 9:49AM

Hi.. read all the stickies on this board also the Insolvency Service website is very useful.
Speak to one of the debt free charities.
Please come on here to ask any questions 99% of us are non judgemental and have gone through various experiences.

sourcrates · 17 September 2018 at 11:31AM

Hi steve,

Great advice form the posters above, do the SOA, sounds like bankruptcy would give you a fresh start, no point thinking DMP again, would take too long, IVA, you don`t have a house to protect, so why bother, bankruptcy is quick, simple, can all be done online/post/over the phone, no requirement to attend court, no more stigma than any other debt solution in my opinion, £680 fee, job done.

After 12 months you are discharged, you may have to pay into an IPA for up to 3 years, depends on your income.

First step is to go on the stepchange website, use the debt remedy tool, that will confirm what i am thinking most likely.

Any questions, come back to us.

debt_doctor · 17 September 2018 at 11:40AM

luvchocolate wrote: »

Please come on here to ask any questions 99% of us are non judgemental and have gone through various experiences.

Yes indeed.
DD.

National_Debtline · 17 September 2018 at 4:42PM

Hi Steve

Well done on taking steps to deal with this. Bankruptcy may well be a suitable option but make sure you get some detailed advice on the process from one of the free debt advice agencies.

Look at whether your gambling is under control and if you might need extra support from someone like Gamblers Anonymous or GamCare. You also need to make sure you are comfortable with budgeting so you will not risk falling back into this situation in the future. A SOA is a good place to start.

Good luck with it all

Susie
@natdebtline

Advice for an idiot

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