Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

elsien · 1 April 2017 at 12:03AM

I guess it's less about pleasing your parents and more about would he feel uncomfortable/out of place/underdressed wearing joggers and a tshirt in a posh restaurant?
Has he not got something else tucked away in wardrobe somewhere for slightly more formal occasions - job interviews or whatever?
Could you just chuck it casually into the conversation about being a slightly more formal occasion dresswise and see what the response is?

ETA - ref your sickness absences, have a look at this link which suggests that employers should made reasonable adjustments for disability related absence, which I think you may be able to argue your MH absences fall into. This could potentially mean adjustments such as more absences before the warnings are triggered, although whether that's reasonable or not will depend on individual businesses,

http://www2.cipd.co.uk/pm/peoplemanagement/b/weblog/archive/2013/08/16/sickness-management-must-be-adjusted-for-disabled-employees.aspx#

Have you thought about posting on the employement part of here with the question? There's at least one trade union rep who may have more up-to-date information.

System · 1 April 2017 at 12:11AM

elsien wrote: »

I guess it's less about pleasing your parents and more about would he feel uncomfortable/out of place/underdressed wearing joggers and a tshirt in a posh restaurant?
Has he not got something else tucked away in wardrobe somewhere for slightly more formal occasions - job interviews or whatever?
Could you just chuck it casually into the conversation about being a slightly more formal occasion dresswise and see what the response is?

ETA - ref your sickness absences, have a look at this link which suggests that employers should made reasonable adjustments for disability related absence, which I think you may be able to argue your MH absences fall into. This could potentially mean more absences before the warnings are triggered.

http://www2.cipd.co.uk/pm/peoplemanagement/b/weblog/archive/2013/08/16/sickness-management-must-be-adjusted-for-disabled-employees.aspx#

Have you thought about posting on the employement part of here with the question? There's at least one trade union rep who may have more up-to-date information.

well i did tell him it was a posh pub but that didn't elicit a response on what he was wearing. It wouldn't bother him at all tbh (to be dressed down and not dressed up). I'm seeing him tomorrow so i will try and bring it up, maybe tell him i'm getting dressed up and ask him what he's gonna wear?

Maybe i'm worrying over nothing and overthinking this? I might be making an issue out of something thats not an issue? I say its a posh pub, but don;t recall them having a dress code last time we went. I'm going to ask my mum if theres a dress code and try and ask Swain about what he;s wearing tomorrow. Two birds with one stone. I know its stupid, but just don;t want my parents to judge him on appearence when he's an amazing guy beyond the clothes he wears.

edit: thanks for that link. I know they possibly make a small allowance for my bipolar but the 4 times i;ve been off have bee a direct result of my bipolar and my medication. (my medication has bee quadrupled in dosage since feb). they might need to look into how often someone with bipolar could be off, something to ask about at least thankyou

whitewing · 1 April 2017 at 12:39AM

I do think you need to have a discussion about the dress code, MU, because how are you going to enjoy yourself otherwise? If he knows what is expected, but then chooses not to adhere, then that is up to him (in the nicest way - some people will get away with it anyway).

System · 1 April 2017 at 12:44AM

whitewing wrote: »

I do think you need to have a discussion about the dress code, MU, because how are you going to enjoy yourself otherwise? If he knows what is expected, but then chooses not to adhere, then that is up to him (in the nicest way - some people will get away with it anyway).

well i've already thrown in that he can wear one his expensive jumpers

so i'm trying to steer him in the more smartly dressed direction.

i'm just going to straight out ask him what he;s going to wear and mention that its more of a smart casual kind of thing. i'm sure he'll understand

tea_lover · 3 April 2017 at 9:56AM

You lot are all very quiet! Hope everyone's ok and has been enjoying the sunshine

Izadora · 3 April 2017 at 11:22AM

Having spent the majority of Saturday lying on the settee watching Buffy I took advantage of the weather yesterday and went for about a 6 mile walk, mostly along the seafront, and I now ache rather a lot. It was a lot more fun than going to a gym though.

onomatopoeia99 · 3 April 2017 at 11:40AM

I was enjoying the sunshine

, this weekend I was working on emptying the shed I want to demolish. Nearly there now, have managed to secrete the majority of its contents in other sheds :rotfl:

heartbreak_star · 3 April 2017 at 2:01PM

I was away at a cheer competition - it was horrifically crowded but we managed to do well anyway

HBS x

calleyw · 3 April 2017 at 9:19PM

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

I was enjoying the sunshine , this weekend I was working on emptying the shed I want to demolish. Nearly there now, have managed to secrete the majority of its contents in other sheds :rotfl:

Sheds!!! I take that to be plural not singular LOL!!!

May I ask where you got your sheds from? I am in the market for a new one and I live about 40 miles away from Bristol. So was wondering if you used a local firm or bought on-line?

A quick wave to everyone. The saga of cleaning and emptying AM's house is over. Check out was 9.30am this morning. So will wait to see when AM's deposit comes back. After 9 years and got the same cooker and washing machine and carpet!!! We did rug doctor the carpet down stairs so it was better.

Any landlord after 9 years would decorate and put new carpets down you would think. Mind you the rent has gone up £200 a month. But with the rubbish next door in the back garden not sure anyone would want to rent it.

AM is back to work tomorrow yay!!! as much as I love him 4 days on the trot I have had him at home. At towards the end of the month he is away for a week in london on a course!!!

Need to tidy up a bit as someone coming to measure up for windows on wednesday evening.

And started to do stuff in the garden. The gravel that I never finished last year. had to re-start as I have no idea why it has so much soil type stuff in it. So sieving and washing it as weeds where growing in

Hope every gets some rest. All take care and hugs and squishes and handshakes all round.

Night

Yours

Calley X

onomatopoeia99 · 4 April 2017 at 8:28AM

The new sheds came from Wayfair, who are an online shop that sell pretty much everything as far as I can tell. I like the sheds (made by Empire sheds), but Wayfair are a bit rubbish about notifying when things will be delivered. They didn't turn up when they were supposed to (I had taken a day off work) then arrived the following morning, which was a Saturday, at 8am. My doorbell woke me up when the delivery driver rang it!

The plan is two smaller sheds to replace one big shed that is very nice, but in completely the wrong place and the bottom part is embedded in a concrete base so it cannot be moved.

Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

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