Debt and Mental Health - How have your debts affected you?

Annagillyr · 6 January 2017 at 2:25AM

This is the first time I have shared my debt story. I am frightened everyday of being found out,
Since a double transplant operation two years ago I have suffered with anxiety and depression. This manifested through sending money online to medicate feeling of isolation and a sense of mt impending possible demise. I spent money on lots of things, never wanting to be the one to say no, and in making a new, but run down, house comfortable.

I am about £20,000 in debt. I am with a debt management company but am struggling with repayments and the orospect I will rake 20 years to pay this off.

They advised an Iva but I had ine before and struggled to get my mortgage. My husband foes not know and I am terrified of him finding out. To the point where I am terrified of dying, not because I'll be dead, but because I will leave him with this.

I teach full time and tutor to help pay things, but with my health I'm not sure how long I can do this for. Life insurance won't even cover me because of my condition so I am frightened of losing my home.

I am not sleeping just praying for a miracle.

churchgoer · 6 January 2017 at 8:49AM

Hi Im so new to all this so sorry guys !
I have 2 defaults on my credit file,both from the same firm Arrow Globle back in 2013.
At the time I was unaware of spending because I was in a manick state. It was only a few months after that I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and sectioned.
Im alot better now as Im on medication.
If I send copies of doctors letter etc and send them off with a cover letter explaining would I stand a good chance of getting them removed. I want to try but dont know were to start.
Thanks

Polgara72 · 11 January 2017 at 12:34AM

Hi. I have moderate/severe recurrent depressive disorder and anxiety. I've had it, to varying degrees for years. In that time I've amassed a huge amount of personal debt and have been on a DMP for 8 years now.
I've mentioned my MH problems to my creditors in the past, but they've said 'I'm sorry to hear that' and moved on. My spending took place during low periods, to attempt to cheer myself up and during the rather hyper (not manic) periods I get prior to a crash.

Unfortunately my marriage ended last year and I lost my job due to unsatisfactory attendence. I've not informed Payplan yet. I'm currently on benefits.

Is it worth me getting one of these forms? I don't really know much about them tbh.

HEROWHENZERO · 11 January 2017 at 3:53PM

One of the biggest contributing factors to depression and stress that I found in my situation was hiding the facts from loved ones. Being brave and opening up was the best thing that I could have done, as they now support me rather than carry on with no idea why I was feeling low.

chachaslide · 13 January 2017 at 1:31PM

I have always been bad with money. From the age of 18 I had a credit card and just fell into the mindset that it was almost free money. I do blame the way that I was invariably brought up by my parents as I was never made to wait for anything or save for anything it was always handed to me on a plate, therefore (although I take full responsibility as an adult) I never really knew the true value of money. I got myself out of debt, bought a house the relationship broke down and I got into debt. I seem to spend money like water when I am miserable yet when I am happy I will save and be really careful. I have battled with anxiety with further relationship breakdowns and the pattern is the same. This time, new relationship, living on my own with my 3 children and I am finally in a place where I am accepting full responsibility for my money problems. I manage no matter how much debt I am in and how many bills I have to pay to give my children £5 a week which I MAKE them save. They are allowed it if they want it but they know that once that £5 is gone it is gone. If I take them into a shop with £5 and I say they can have something I don't so much as go one penny over that allowance. It has really made them stop and think about what they are doing with their money and they are only 10, 6 and 4. I cant press enough to anyone with young children just how important I have found this to be.

Rochdale_Guy · 1 March 2017 at 4:22PM

Not getting anywhere....

mothernerd · 1 March 2017 at 4:29PM

Rochdale Guy please get help. Nothign is ever so bad that you can't get through it, but ask for help - from professionals like Stepchange debt charity, on here, your doctor and there is something called CALM the Campaign Against Living Miserably aimed at men (see adverts on bus stations etc.

Please, you sound really down - get help now.

Rochdale_Guy · 1 March 2017 at 4:38PM

mothernerd wrote: »

Rochdale Guy please get help. Nothign is ever so bad that you can't get through it, but ask for help - from professionals like Stepchange debt charity, on here, your doctor and there is something called CALM the Campaign Against Living Miserably aimed at men (see adverts on bus stations etc.

Please, you sound really down - get help now.

Thanks, but I am already on a DMP with StepChange.

Everything is going up, gas, electric, council tax, fuel, internet/landline... yet I get a lousy 1% pay increase at work.

trackbern · 7 March 2017 at 11:43PM

Hi all I felt compelled to write a post as a Car accident in August 2015 has left me in terrible debt. The most frustrating thing for me is my Solicitors and the Third Party Insurer are being so slow to get/pay me an interim payment for loss of earnings and medical expenses. The driver accepted liability, the loss of earnings have all been proven and confirmed and a specialist has agreed my injury's caused by the accident made it not possible for me to work. This was all confirmed last year and yet I cannot get any of the significant money they owe me. This week I am going to have to go into debt management plan which will severely impact my ability to work in my field (FS) in the future as it will impact my credit file. Basically my life is ruined purely down to the accident and the time it is taken to get any money. I am not interested in getting the compensation yet just the losses I have incurred. This is so unfair as in other countries the third party insurer has to settle really quickly once liability has been agreed. I would love Martin Lewis to take up this issue as it has had a severe impact on my Mental Health and my stress levels are through the roof. I have never even been late with a payment in my entire working life and now through no fault of my own my credit score is going to be destroyed and I cannot work due to constant back pain. Any advice would be really appreciated.

itsallabitmuch · 16 March 2017 at 7:40PM

I thought I'd put my experience in here, as a newbie to DFW.

My story is probably the polar opposite of what people expect.

My mood gets low thinking about my debt at times, but this is a massive improvement. And so my tale begins...

When I was 6, I attempted to take my own life. The doctors told my parents that I was "too young to be depressed", and that I was basically seeking attention. Between that day and today, I have made over 100 attempts to take my life...thankfully (and rather obviously!), they were all unsuccessful.

When I was 15, I was FINALLY referred to CAMHS, where I eventually received two diagnoses:

1. Cyclothymia
2. Borderline Personality Disorder

Spending was my crutch when I was depressed, but it was also my exhilaration when I was manic. When I was down, buying things comforted me. The feelings never lasted long though, and so I would continue to buy until I got to the point of (what I saw as) no return. When I was manic, no-one could touch me. I was a goddess. My creditors couldn't touch me, because I was untouchable. They knew who I was, and they wouldn't even attempt to ask me to read a single penny...it would be sacrilegious, after all.

I am very lucky in that I met my super-supportive husband, who has helped me over the years to repay a large portion of debt (as I have helped him) - it's always been a joint effort with us. Until I got seriously ill again, and could no longer work. Then, I couldn't pay as much off. Then, payments starting defaulting. Then, my husband lost his job, and had to take a substantially lower-paying job to keep us afloat.

It was February 2017, when my friend told me to look into a DMP with StepChange DC. She had gone bankrupt some years previously, and offered me support with the process of setting up a DMP. On 1st March, my first payment went out.

Don't get me wrong, I'm always going to be Cyclothymic, and I'll always have BPD. But the sheer FREEDOM of knowing I am FACING things (at long last!) is my true exhilaration. I know that I have a long, hard road ahead of me. I know that my illnesses could try to get me to be out-of-control again, but they won't win. I'm the winner here, for I have taken responsibility, with the support of my husband, best friend, and the lovely lot here at DFW.

My mental health will always be a large part of my life, but debt won't!

Debt and Mental Health - How have your debts affected you?

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