Money Moral Dilemma: Should we give our daughter the same allowance as our son?

24

Comments

  • Wholenut1
    Wholenut1 Posts: 2 Newbie
    Of course! I can’t believe you are even asking this 🤦🏻!♀️
  • GlasweJen
    GlasweJen Posts: 7,451 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post Combo Breaker
    I'm sure MSE went nuts when research said there was a gender pay gap when it came to pocket money. I can't believe you'd honestly contemplate giving a child less for any reason. Do you often foster sibling resentment?
  • sazpot
    sazpot Posts: 107 Forumite
    I got more than my older brother because my expenditure was higher.

    Our pocket money was to cover specific things (haircuts, bus fares, certain social activities, toiletries etc). The required amount was priced up for the year at the current rates and that’s what we got. For example being female my haircuts were over twice the price so I got that much more, bus fares had increased, I needed more essential toiletries etc.

    We got the same no of bus trips, haircuts, cinema trips etc but in monetary terms I got more. My parents chose to provide a certain lifestyle rather than set number of pounds.

    We both worked and that money was for extras but we both really just saved for driving and university.
  • bosric
    bosric Posts: 1 Newbie
    Pay a proportion of what they earn as an incentive.
  • badmemory
    badmemory Posts: 7,718 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post
    Said very tongue in cheek



    Pay her the lower amount so she can get used to the fact that females are less financially valued than males!!
  • Flobberchops
    Flobberchops Posts: 1,279 Forumite
    First Post Combo Breaker First Anniversary
    An allowance is supposed to be given on the basis of goodwill and parental generosity - not in the form of a means-tested benefit.


    Giving the lower earner a higher allowance would set a TERRIBLE lesson - hard work doesn't pay, do the bare minimum, the authorities will provide for you. No way. We have enough council estates brimming with people who have that mindset (reinforced by a backwards benefits system that disincentivises financial social mobility). Capitalist meritocracy is the way to go: work harder, earn more.



    On the most basic level, regardless of what is "right", do you really want to imply one of your children is more deserving of your money?
    : )
  • ajm79
    ajm79 Posts: 1 Newbie
    I think yes or she's in effect being discouraged from doing her job. It reminds me of the benefit system where some people don't work, even when they want to, because they are better off on benefits!!
  • winston_1
    winston_1 Posts: 23 Forumite
    How times have changed. As soon as I had a part time job pocket money stopped and I was asked to make a contribution to the household expenses.
  • lewisia
    lewisia Posts: 4 Newbie
    Most of these moral dilemmas could be solved by actually talking to the people concerned!

    Do families not communicate any more, my family talk any problems/dilemmas through with
    each other.
  • SueC_2
    SueC_2 Posts: 1,673 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post
    You can cut it whatever way you want.


    Pay your daughter less - so each of their total 'income' is equal.
    Pay them both the same - so neither of them feels hard done by.
    Pay your daughter more - as an important lesson that the harder you work, the more you are rewarded.


    Up to you and where your values lie.
This discussion has been closed.
★ ★ ★ Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 343K Banking & Borrowing
  • 250K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 449.6K Spending & Discounts
  • 235.1K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 607.8K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 173K Life & Family
  • 247.8K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.9K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards