At a loss...

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To cut a long story short as best I can:

I’m 35 years old and always had a bad history with money. Nothing major, no CCJs etc, but was never really taught about money growing up. My parents (now retired) and very secure thanks to their hard work and sensible saving etc. They always bailed me out...so subconsciously my entire life, I knew if I messed up, I’d get bailed out.

Then I started living with my partner and subconsciously passed all this on to him.

Anyway - so 3 years ago, I left my job (part time low pay) and started my own business. I worked my !!!! off to over come my financial demons - even went down the woo woo path of visualising, raising my vibrations - the works! My absolute dream was to warn my own money, my own way, to pay 50% of all our bills and to be 100% financially independent. And I did it! My business even earned so much that I was able to pay my partner to do some work.

Then about 3 months ago - everything went wrong. I lost all my work due this year and although I tried and tried, no one wanted me all of a sudden. And to kick me in the teeth even more, someone stole a project I did for them in May (which worked a treat) and delivered it themselves (poorly I might add), so they wouldn’t have to pay me.

Anyway...it appears my money demons have returned. With the money I earned, I didn’t know how to budget. So i made no savings. I didn’t splash out, I just spent more than I should have each month. And now, I am £6k in debt (business expenses mostly I had to put in personal credit cards) and ALL my work has dried up. I have options for earning, but none that are in a hurry to come my way.

I will run out of money on 22nd September.

I truly feel gutted, devastated and ashamed. I really really thought I had conquered all of this.

And now I don’t know what to do.

Comments

  • D_M_E
    D_M_E Posts: 3,008 Forumite
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    If you did a project for someone - and whoeveritis commissioned you to do it - then surely you should be paid for your time and effort spent doing said project, despite the fact that they delivered the goods (allbeit badly)?

    If this is the case then a letter before claim, followed by a small claims court action should follow? MCOL?

    As for the debts, is there nothing you can cut back on, are you entitled to claim any benefits, council tax benefit, can you or your partner find any employment, anything will do on a temporary basis.
  • Terry_Towelling
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    Coach1234 wrote: »
    To cut a long story short as best I can:

    I’m 35 years old and always had a bad history with money. Nothing major, no CCJs etc, but was never really taught about money growing up. My parents (now retired) and very secure thanks to their hard work and sensible saving etc. They always bailed me out...so subconsciously my entire life, I knew if I messed up, I’d get bailed out.

    Then I started living with my partner and subconsciously passed all this on to him.

    Anyway - so 3 years ago, I left my job (part time low pay) and started my own business. I worked my !!!! off to over come my financial demons - even went down the woo woo path of visualising, raising my vibrations - the works! My absolute dream was to earn my own money, my own way, to pay 50% of all our bills and to be 100% financially independent. And I did it! My business even earned so much that I was able to pay my partner to do some work.

    Then about 3 months ago - everything went wrong. I lost all my work due this year and although I tried and tried, no one wanted me all of a sudden. And to kick me in the teeth even more, someone stole a project I did for them in May (which worked a treat) and delivered it themselves (poorly I might add), so they wouldn’t have to pay me.

    Anyway...it appears my money demons have returned. With the money I earned, I didn’t know how to budget. So i made no savings. I didn’t splash out, I just spent more than I should have each month. And now, I am £6k in debt (business expenses mostly I had to put in personal credit cards) and ALL my work has dried up. I have options for earning, but none that are in a hurry to come my way.

    I will run out of money on 22nd September.

    I truly feel gutted, devastated and ashamed. I really really thought I had conquered all of this.

    And now I don’t know what to do.

    So, what is it that brings you to the 'loans' section of the MSE website for assistance?

    Could you enlighten us as to how the person you did some work for didn't pay you for it? You were commissioned to work for them and deliver it to them. What they then do with it is presumably up to them unless you put something in the contract to govern that - you did have a contract with them, didn't you?

    I presume you have spoken to the end user or you wouldn't know that the project was poorly delivered, would you? What did they say about it?

    Would you be prepared to let us know what sort of work this was and why do you think it all dried up so suddenly?
  • meer53
    meer53 Posts: 10,217 Forumite
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    I would apply for as many jobs as you can, you need an income, being self employed hasn't worked for you, maybe you could try again once you've built up a reserve ? There are jobs out there, may not be what you want to do but beggars can't be choosers. My Uni student daughter has been offered 2 jobs this week, she also has a part time job at home during Uni holidays, she's not found it too difficult to find jobs.
  • parking_question_chap
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    Coach1234 wrote: »

    And now I don’t know what to do.

    Surely the answer in the short term is start applying for jobs.
  • [Deleted User]
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    Strong work ethic ……… you had it at the start, now start looking again, do not let a knockback hold you up.

    Being self employed means you will always have to look for work, never, ever, sit back and take what you have for granted because what you're describing will be the outcome.

    Your action now is to start looking for some paid work, so that in the interim you have a wage each week/month/whatever, don't get into the woe-is-me phase or you'll languish there for too long, it'll affect your outlook, and you'll have regressed back back into your old ways of being that person that allows other people to bail them out.
    Come on, buck up :beer:
  • Misslayed
    Misslayed Posts: 14,178 Senior Ambassador
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    Please press :spam:
    I’m a Senior Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on the Competition Time, Site Feedback and Marriage, Relationships and Families boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com All views are my own and not the official line of Money Saving Expert.
  • DCFC79
    DCFC79 Posts: 40,598 Forumite
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    meer53 wrote: »
    I would apply for as many jobs as you can, you need an income, being self employed hasn't worked for you, maybe you could try again once you've built up a reserve ? There are jobs out there, may not be what you want to do but beggars can't be choosers. My Uni student daughter has been offered 2 jobs this week, she also has a part time job at home during Uni holidays, she's not found it too difficult to find jobs.

    This advice is what I would have posted.
  • Terry_Towelling
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    Misslayed wrote: »
    Please press :spam:
    Where a thread is so obviously bogus (as this one is) I'd rather not press 'spam' but try to draw the poster out on some of the rubbish they put in. Some contributors also like to give the OP the benefit of the doubt, take them at face-value and try to help.

    Is it not possible/permissible for board guides to press 'Spam'?
  • soolin
    soolin Posts: 72,206 Ambassador
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    Where a thread is so obviously bogus (as this one is) I'd rather not press 'spam' but try to draw the poster out on some of the rubbish they put in. Some contributors also like to give the OP the benefit of the doubt, take them at face-value and try to help.

    Is it not possible/permissible for board guides to press 'Spam'?

    The spam referred to was removed and you obviously didn't see it - but we've more posted now. The spam mention was not aimed at the OP and yes BGs can press the spam button as well but like all users one report alone will not remove the spam so we ask others to report as well.
    I’m a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on the eBay, Auctions, Car Boot & Jumble Sales, Boost Your Income, Praise, Vents & Warnings, Overseas Holidays & Travel Planning , UK Holidays, Days Out & Entertainments boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know.. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com.All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.
  • kazwookie
    kazwookie Posts: 13,842 Forumite
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    What changed 3 months ago?

    Why did all work dry up? I suggest you contact your business network of contacts you have built up, and push start them again.
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