Buying house with Boyfriend but only his name on the mortgage...how can I protect me?

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  • DarkShadow
    DarkShadow Posts: 180 Forumite
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    Did OP get married?
    Bank accounts
    Santander : 17 year relationship, 0 problems to date.
  • meer53
    meer53 Posts: 10,217 Forumite
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    DarkShadow wrote: »
    Did OP get married?

    Since yesterday ? Doubt it.
  • Pixie5740
    Pixie5740 Posts: 14,515 Forumite
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    cashbackproblems wrote: »
    Yes a typical money grabber wants full entitlement but putting in a piddly 5k. Guys are getting smart to this now and not marrying unless the female is financially equal as they lose out otherwise in divorce

    Where did the OP say she wanted full entitlement to the property? What's that? Nowhere. All the OP asked was how to protect her interest in the property but the answer is that she can't. She will have to waive her protection in order to give her boyfriend £5k to buy a property he could not otherwise afford. Then there's the £3.5k extras for his house paid for using her credit card as well as her contributing towards the capital repayments of his mortgage each month.

    It's sad that you seem to think only in monetary terms when defining equals in a marriage.
  • pearl123
    pearl123 Posts: 2,056 Forumite
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    If your name is not on the mortgage you get nothing, however if he goes bankrupt you won't be tied in with him either!
  • englishrosie
    englishrosie Posts: 6 Forumite
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    Thank you for all the help guys, I sat down and talked with my partner about our future plans....probably should have been my first port of call! But we'd planned to change the mortgage in 2 years anyway and at that point I will be put on :) His credit score will increase significantly and mines already good....add my 2 r tax returns in and we should be good :)

    Based on affordability is why the adviser put me down as not living there. Despite putting down a hefty deposit my partners credit score was very low, if I was on the mortgage we wouldn't have got it, and we'd have lost or dream house in a perfect location for our family.

    It is so difficult to get a mortgage these days and get on the property ladder I should be glad we have finally done it. Think my baggage from previous relationships kicked in a little and I panicked.

    I know some think that were only boyfriend/girlfriend and not married so I shouldnt have an issue but we have been together over 7 years but the only reason we haven't go round to a legal commitment is because we had a lot of illness and deaths happen in those years and it just hasn't been a high priority :( The money he was left was specifically as a deposit for him to buy US a house.

    I know some things we've been advised by our broker might be dubious/law breaking etc....but we can more than afford the mortgage and wont fall behind on any payments....sometimes you have to slip into the grey areas now again to achieve your goal. Were not ripping anyone off and the mortgage will always be paid...so no harm no foul :)

    Once again though thank you to everyone that replied and all the advice xxx
  • englishrosie
    englishrosie Posts: 6 Forumite
    edited 18 May 2017 at 11:31PM
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    "Yes a typical money grabber wants full entitlement but putting in a piddly 5k. Guys are getting smart to this now and not marrying unless the female is financially equal as they lose out otherwise in divorce"

    I think someone is a tad jaded lol Just as a point during our 7+ years together my partner had to leave his job. I supported him and his 3 children for quite some time and have helped him clear his debts....I didnt keep a tab but I'm pretty sure the total cost would add up!

    Lets try not to put everyone in the same box
  • englishrosie
    englishrosie Posts: 6 Forumite
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    jackieblack wrote: »
    Lack of response from the OP would indicate that she's not getting the responses she was hoping for...


    A fairly common phenomenon IME

    Sorry got swamped at work, daughter came home from Uni, not had a chance to get back online. But I do appreciated all the responses, even if they weren't what I hoped for (Well except the all woman are money grabbers one lol). Luckily it has led me to have a proper talk with my partner and sort the whole thing out :)
  • gettingtheresometime
    gettingtheresometime Posts: 6,911 Forumite
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    englishrosie wrote: »
    Sorry got swamped at work, daughter came home from Uni, not had a chance to get back online. But I do appreciated all the responses, even if they weren't what I hoped for (Well except the all woman are money grabbers one lol). Luckily it has led me to have a proper talk with my partner and sort the whole thing out :)

    Sorry but you haven't.

    If you do what you plan to do, you'll be running the risk of him kicking you out at any point with no legal comeback.

    Words are all very well but unless you've got something you can take into court, should the worst happen they don't mean a thing.

    I guess though you know what you're doing.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    englishrosie wrote: »
    I know some think that were only boyfriend/girlfriend and not married so I shouldnt have an issue but we have been together over 7 years but the only reason we haven't go round to a legal commitment is because we had a lot of illness and deaths happen in those years and it just hasn't been a high priority :(

    That's a reason not to have a big wedding - it's not a good reason to put off getting married.

    Do it now - the two of you at your local register office - and have a big party at some time in the future.
  • Malthusian
    Malthusian Posts: 10,941 Forumite
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    cashbackproblems wrote: »
    Yes a typical money grabber wants full entitlement but putting in a piddly 5k. Guys are getting smart to this now and not marrying unless the female is financially equal as they lose out otherwise in divorce

    If a man refuses to countenance marrying anyone who is not "financially equal" it's not the woman who is the money grabber.

    The men who "lose out" from divorce are those who think they can have their cake and eat it, i.e. get the tax and social benefits of marriage but not have to pay the cost. Who want to be treated as one unit for as long as it suits them and they get free childcare and extra tax allowances but as a separate individual as soon as it doesn't. Doesn't work that way.
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