Is it time to ban Christmas presents? Blog and poll discussion

glam60gran · 11 November 2009 at 1:34PM

we as a family cut back 2 years ago - was suggested by my brother - thought it was a bit mean at the time - but he has 2 granchildren and I have five - so we only buy now for our own immediate family - but do buy for birthdays - it has taken the presure off us all - more so our children, who have large mortgages. I also insist my children do what they want at Christmas - not like my generation of having to go to one set of parents one year and the others the next year. It works well for us.

cymro · 11 November 2009 at 1:43PM

Wow I have been thinking this for years and now somebody has put it in writing - Thanks Martin. Christmas has become very much a retail festival - shops selling Christmas items in August is a complete turn-off. I hear of millions of people putting themselves under all sorts of pressure to meet this massive expenditure deadline of 25th December - many of whom cannot afford it. If you really want some retail therapy save your wonga until the New Year sales.

Suzinger · 11 November 2009 at 1:43PM

I love this article and agree completely :Twith what you are saying Martin. I don't tend to go for this gift-swap thing. But what I do, like last Christmas for instance is make family and friends a Christmas cake or buy really useful things, things that are needed rather than just buying for the sake of it.

I agree with the suggestion of buying for newly weds and coming of age as they are really significant times when buying gifts for them really does make a difference. But if we are all honest, if there was something we really wanted, surely we would go out and buy it for ourselves??

Christmas really has lost all its meaning and that is really sad. If only people focussed on the real meaning of Christmas.

ebenezerella · 11 November 2009 at 1:48PM

Christmas is very commercial. No presents at all seems very Scrooge like so a set cash limit on presents within a family or a Secret Santa where everyone buys a present for a fixed amount either for a random recipient or a named one seems a good solution.

Having a birthday to sort in December is a bummer as too much is also spent on birthdays. Flowers and a cake is good. Everything else seems too much.

[Deleted User] · 11 November 2009 at 1:48PM

I'm sick of Christmas already. All the shops are decorated and selling mostly TAT - yes it IS mostly tat - done up in lots of packaging. The shops are already heaving with people buying all this rubbish and the endless loop of Christmas music is enough to make anyone lose whatever Christmas spirit they started out with.

(At the risk of upsetting the many Boots fans - why exactly are the Christmas 3 for 2s seen as such good deals? Much of the stuff is cheaper to buy in Boots and elsewhere without the fancy packaging!) Ditto for all the other stores. As for BHS, I cannot even bear to go in there - such is the rubbish by the entrance that poses as someone's Christmas gift.

Does anyone reading this actually WANT strange flavoured oils and all the other weird flavoured jams and chutneys? Champagne or whisky flavoured jam for goodness sake in a tiny jar stuffed into a box of tissue with another equally awful concoction.)

The shopping centre nearest to me has an enormous tree up and all the decorations. They look lovely - but the little kids think Santa is coming this week! Cue... tantrums galore.

Meanwhile- at work - I'm being pestered to decide if I want to go to the 'works outing' - (no - I do not). And aaargh! The secret Santa list has again appeared.

Then there's all the offers to spend X amount just to get free postage or some other small discount. I wonder how many people then spend up to that amount just to get the free postage or discount.

A bargain is only a bargain if you were going to buy the thing anyway.

As for Martin asking if Christmas should be banned? It's only a matter of time before it is. No doubt someone somewhere is already dreaming up reasons as to why it's offensive to someone.

GraciesGran · 11 November 2009 at 2:07PM

We stopped buying presents about 7 years ago, the children were working adults and were in a position to buy what they wanted. We do secret santa instead with a £10 limit. I buy presents for my grandchildren/step grandchildren once again with a £10 limit - set by their parents. We use the Christmas holidays as a time to get together and have fun - we go to London to look at the lights, we go to the Pantomime. We are making the Christmas cake this weekend, late I know but it's the first time we've been able to get together.

harrumph_2 · 11 November 2009 at 2:07PM

I've just come back from the shops where I went to take back a birthday present from friend and been given a credit note which I will use to buy something for the person who bought me the present, when it is her birthday. I suspect that my gift was a similar "deal" as it came from same shop I bought her last present. What a ridiculous farce and waste of time. As for Christmas, my heart sinks when they start putting out all the trash, October time, in the shops and the result is a stubborn desire to spend absolutely zero.

bargainbetty · 11 November 2009 at 2:10PM

cepheus wrote: »

For physical cards, why not have a truly recycleable card where you just rub out the previous name and put in you own?

My family and I do this for a laugh every now and again. My flatmate reused a birthday card as a Father's Day card by crossing out and re-writing bits.

We re-use present bags too, and one has now lasted four years. Small bag, obviously.

brokeinwales · 11 November 2009 at 2:13PM

I'm not sure the answer is "banning" gifts, so much as trying to address the cynical cash-centred attitude that seems to surround their giving.

If people do have some kind of crazy "she spent £20 on me so I have to spend £20 on her" obligation, then it's that attitude that needs abnning, rather than the gift giving itself, which is a lovley gesture between friends.

So if Sandra (or whatever her name was!) buys Violet a £20 necklace, and Violet spends £2 on the ingredients to bake a delicious cake for Sandra - what on earth would be wrong with that? If Sandra has a problem she wouldn't be a very good friend. Generally the people one buys gifts for are people you care about and communicate with regularly, so you're relationship is unlikely to be based on a cynical like-for-like exchange.

I do, however, have a major problem with things like Secret santa in groups, and gift "whiprounds" at work, where you are more or less bullied into some pointless collective moneyspending ritual and the idea of choosing to buy a gift for someone you know and care about is completely lost. You may as well all just exchange fivers. Now that seems pretty cynical and scrooge-like to me.

savingmore · 11 November 2009 at 2:15PM

i love christmas and always will. a few years ago in my family we did a £2 present for each adult and £5 for children. It was the BEST christmas present opening we ever did, as it was so much fun and we had planned it the christmas before so we all knew to look out for something special and meaningful to that person for £2. it was amazing what everyone came up with, it was a thought for the person often carried through the year and culminated with alot of fun on the day. my OH's family however hate the idea and for a few christmas we asked not to swop presents as we couldn't afford it and they really thought we were scrooge's, so this year we are back to buying tat for them as we don't want to upset them in the last years of their life..... it is such a pressure off when you know you don't have to do the 'they spent about £20 so we better'...it takes the meaning out of such a special time of year......this is what we need to deal with, taking the commercial pressure out of christmas, not banning things.....

Is it time to ban Christmas presents? Blog and poll discussion

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