Real life MMD: Should he pay for his mistake?

24

Comments

  • ShakeyStacey
    ShakeyStacey Posts: 34 Forumite
    How clingy are you lot that you'd all dump your boyfriends for going away without you?

    Unfortunately something has gone wrong here, but you can't blame it on one guy. It's the risk you take with suprise parties. Try explaining to the venue and see if they will cut you some slack.
  • laughing_cow
    laughing_cow Posts: 597 Forumite
    ShakeyStacey wrote: »
    How clingy are you lot that you'd all dump your boyfriends for going away without you?

    I agree - I was quite shocked by some of the replies that the boyfriend should be dumped or made to pay! We often take separate trips from one another - I wouldn't want him to come with me on a girls spa weekend!
  • badgerwatchers
    badgerwatchers Posts: 17 Forumite
    an unfortunate mix up all round - lesson one always put dates in writing even to friends.
    see if you can chnge the date at the venue you have booked if not i think the loss is down to you for not checking that his mate had the date firmly in mind.

    i think those prepared to dump the boyfriend on the grounds of going away are shallow - more important that he didn't communicate with you before commiting to the flights for his trip, but maybe this relationship isn't that longstanding?
  • Pellyman
    Pellyman Posts: 53 Forumite
    THAT'S LIFE ! If the venue won't change the date or offer a refund - THAT'S LIFE TOO. If the 'friend' hasn't already offered to pay (or share) you could be in trouble - BUT THAT'S LIFE. If your boyfriend is flying off without a nice girl like you then - THAT WAS LIFE, time to start again. Better luck next time.
  • happyinflorida
    happyinflorida Posts: 807 Forumite
    First Post First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    This is your boyfriend?! And he's booked a weekend away without telling you? He's booked the flight without telling you?! Are you really going out with someone like this? Is this a story or real life?!
    This whole story is so far fetched I don't believe it and I'm not giving any answer as it's just too wrong to be true!
  • elizabethhull
    elizabethhull Posts: 765 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post
    edited 4 May 2011 at 11:01AM
    Yet another example of how surprise parties can go wrong - the scope for misunderstandings is huge!
    If it's the sort of relationship where separate holidays are not an issue, why were you not told earlier? As usual, we need to know more than is said.

    If it's just the deposit you'd lose, I'd just chalk it up to life - irritating but there you go.
    If you've already paid for the lot, then tell your boyfriend you're holding a party without him, he might just choose to stay & celebrate with you. If not, well you can have a good time without him, just as he is having without you. I would have thought the guests would think it very funny and you have a great anecdote to tell for ages! (Btw, a friend of mine held an engagement party for her son and prospective DIL, and NEITHER of them could attend!! We all thought it was hilarious).

    And no, the friend may be an idiot, but he is definitely not liable financially.
  • Ebenezer_Screwj
    Ebenezer_Screwj Posts: 437 Forumite
    You have been badly let down, the friend must make good your loss.
  • Losinmoney
    Losinmoney Posts: 79 Forumite
    ShakeyStacey wrote: »
    How clingy are you lot that you'd all dump your boyfriends for going away without you?

    Unfortunately something has gone wrong here, but you can't blame it on one guy. It's the risk you take with suprise parties. Try explaining to the venue and see if they will cut you some slack.

    Yes. Surprise parties are a nightmare!
  • Marco12452
    Marco12452 Posts: 178 Forumite
    Flights can be rearranged easily at far less cost than cancelling a venue and catering.
  • purpleweasel
    purpleweasel Posts: 116 Forumite
    Why is everyone assuming that the boyfriend has booked this weekend away without consulting her? Perhaps the best friend wasn't quick enough off the mark or didn't make a big enough deal about the guys' night out? If they have regular guys' nights he might not have thought there was a problem in missing one, and who says you can't have different groups of friends? The best mate could have pretended it was a surprise party for someone else to make sure the boyfriend didn't double-book. As for the dilemma-ee, what could she say? "No, i don't think you should go away that weekend because - er - damn - no reason really!". Back to the point, have a word with the venue, they might be able to move the date; have a word with the best mate & find out what happened, and work it out between you. If push comes to shove, spill the beans to boyfriend and let him choose, you might find he can alter his flights more easily than you can change the venue
This discussion has been closed.
★ ★ ★ Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 343.1K Banking & Borrowing
  • 250.1K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 449.6K Spending & Discounts
  • 235.2K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 607.8K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 173K Life & Family
  • 247.8K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.9K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards