A lighter life - Enough is Enough!

28 January 2018

I joined this site years ago (2010!) with good intentions, made a few posts but mostly lurked, then didn't visit. But I've decided I need to do this, enough of the ostrich or starting and then tailing off, I need to get on top of my finances this year. I do keep a personal money diary and spreadsheet but it doesn't really hold me accountable - it can be very easy to kid yourself! Posting in a public forum is my way of trying to keep myself accountable and being brutally honest with myself - I haven't always made the best choices.

Current situation as at 28 January 2018:
Mortgage 1 - £9,699.49 - 11 years 2 months left
Mortgage 2 - £5,085.24 - 2 years 10 months left
Mortgage 3 - £29,708.08 - 11 years 2 months left

Total Mortgage debt = £44,492.81

Tesco Loan - £3,951.62 - 1 year 7 months left
Tesco Credit Card - £8,864.75
Nationwide Credit Card - £12,217.71
Overdrafts - £1,572.93

Total unsecured debt = £26,607.01

TOTAL DEBTS = £71,099.82 :eek:

This will change in the next few days as I have just been paid and February's bills will be going out. I also (tut tut) need to submit my tax return for last year (nothing like last minute...but best laid plans and all that jazz.....) and I am holding a few deposits for tickets I am getting for social events that I'm organising which I need to pay over but some monies are on paypal account, some have been transferred over for me to make payment so are included in the above figures - so won't have the completely true picture until I've paid for all tickets next week and filed my tax return.

How I got in the mess....
Over the years has been a bit of a rollercoaster - I was quite good as a child and saved, saved, saved. Was lucky enough not to have to work until I went to university (and even then only in the second year). It was more or less downhill from there with the odd upturn...

So many lessons learnt - I wish I understood then what I understand now around money but hindsight is a wonderful thing - and sometimes the flesh is weak....

Bought a house with my ex-husband back in 1996 (I so wish my mortgage was now what it was then!), my savings were used for our deposit. Got a small inheritance, and we had talked about once we paid off our house buying a BTL (and could have made a killing if I had understood how it worked!) - but instead we chose to pay off a loan, I made one major purchase of a fireplace (which I still love to this day) and the rest...well I'm not quite sure! But we didn't live particularly extravagantly but both wages together were less than I earn by myself now, so I guess it made things a little more comfortable.

Bought ex out when we divorced (not fully taking into account mortgage and what I'd paid as deposit (and a little bit of guilt at ending the marriage) - ended up paying him £10k too much. Then proceeded to party away 5 years and was a complete ostrich. Had a LBM and downgraded partying ways and took head of out sand and put the vodka debts against the mortgage and vowed never again!

Fast forward on a few years, my house needed a major renovation - too many things to do including kitchen/bathroom (had leaked to the point ceiling fell in), cracks in wall, electrics needed doing etc etc - so decided to strip it back and redo. Tried to remortgage but couldn't initially because of debts, so got a second part time job. Tried again a little later and managed to get some of the money for the refurb (had to extend the term of the further advance and my original mortgage by 9 years too) and took out a 10 year loan for the rest.

Forward on a couple of years, still working 2 jobs (one turned into freelancing work), I got made redundant - payout in theory was ok - but I decided to look at property again at that point, spent some money on a course to understand and never took action (so managed to lose money in property! - that being said would still like to do one day). Took a couple of months off from working full time as I had worked 2 jobs for the last 4 years, but freelance dropped slightly and I got a bit depressed. Then as was looking for job full time got offered a freelance role - I had hoped to work part time (which at this point I could afford) but it turned into full time+. Don't get me wrong it paid quite well (relatively) to being employed, and I loved it, however my tendency to put others first meant I sacrificed doing things I wanted (hence the property didn't get moved forward). I will admit to a little flash spending again as I had a good monthly income - nice meals out, some nice clothes (a bit of an ebay addiction!).

So it brings us to the last couple of years - got bullied out of the role after several years , made suicidal and too ill to work for 6 months. Am now back in work but salary is 30% less than what I was earning (although they are lovely people I work with now) and I have the fact that any safety net I did have was used up and then some in the 6 months I was too ill to work.

So whilst there have been a couple of instances of some sums coming in, circumstances have meant they haven't actually made a positive difference (although the money spent on the education may still pay off and I do love learning new things). Over the years I have not been sensible with my spending habits for the most part (I can no longer kid myself) and I have splurged on partying, eating out, and nice clothes and wasted money on a few courses that I never followed through with despite best intentions (in part because I was too busy working to pay off debit incurred (stupid right?!) and in part because I have a tendency to put others first sometimes even when detrimental to myself (I'm trying not to do this these days!)). Don't get me wrong I had some fantastic times but whilst I thought about saving money, didn't actually follow through.

I have a cunning plan....
So this brings me up to date. Whilst £71k isn't the highest debt ever because of the way it is split it is hard work.

We all need to start somewhere right?! So I'm drawing a line under my old habits and moving forward.

I need to weigh up the option to remortgage - as whilst there is equity in the house that would cover it, when I looked pre Christmas I couldn't due to only having been in new role for a couple of months and having had to take a payment holiday on mortgage as I wasn't working. I was also advised that whilst I am on SVR because of when I took out/revamped my mortgages last there are some benefits that I wouldn't get now, including overpaying without penalty, payment holidays etc, so currently with rate increase is about £10 more a month than it would be if I remortgaged without adding in other debts. With current plans to pay off as much as I can asap, I'm not sure it is worth losing those benefits for the sake of a £10 a month saving. Also, with one mortgage and a loan ending in the next few years I'm rather reluctant to consolidate with other debts and increase the term. Also from a morale point of view it feels like a step backwards.

I've made a strictish budget for the year. I have set limits for the year, which with current calculations mean I shouldn't go any further into debt at £0 after minimum payments etc, although there will be a little upfront loading. But then anything over my current salary is a bonus and can go against debts (with a small percentage going into the 'leisure' fund for the odd reward as I do believe there needs to be some element of carrot for it to work longer term for me). It has been mentioned about a salary review this quarter and some freelance work was mentioned last year but has yet to come to fruition but combined they would put me back to the amount I was on, so fingers crossed.

I've already reduced my mobile bill to £13 a month and currently looking at downgrading home phone/broadband. I only use catch up TV so no cable/licence and currently paid up on Prime until mid-year and am not intending on renewing. However I have done without a TV before and can do so again - in fact it may be a positive thing. I've moved my gas and electric, and although it wasn't to the lowest, I paid a very tiny amount more than the lowest as it was for renewable energy sources (I refound my passion about environmental issues last year as well as exploring the world of minimalism and decluttering). I'm also about to cancel my heating breakdown insurance as I was lucky and won a year's service in a raffle. I'm going to look at building insurance when that comes up for renewal later in the year too.

I've still got to look at claiming PPI but it is definitely on my radar but other things are currently higher on the to do list.

I'm also currently going through my house and decluttering. The aim is to eventually have a capsulish wardrobe that is versatile for work and day to day leisure with the odd piece for other things. I had a bit of an ebay addiction when I was made redundant then was earning a decent amount - and bought dresses etc that for the most part are not really needed for the job I do, as it is slightly more casual with the odd dress up day. So have decided to be as ruthless as I can and try and sell as much as I can. I'm having a struggle with some items, for example I have a pair of glitter Jimmy Choo shoes and bag, and I have used them twice in the last 6 months and still love them, but also recognise they have a resale value and they are not a necessity. There are a few items like that. That being said the items I have bought on ebay have been good quality items that I wouldn't pay full price for and generally at 25% or less, so they do remain in good condition for longer. However I fully recognise that my spending was out of control on clothes at one point and I have far too much which can be resold. Most of the purchases I have made in the last 6 months have been based around a versatile wardrobe of fewer items that work together so I can get rid of the other items. I'm far from perfect but I am getting better and becoming more aware of my spending and spending it on items I will wear over and over. As I really like the idea of a capsule wardrobe it is making things easier to walk away from. Not totally there yet as still on ebay trying to sell items so occasionally get drawn in (see below).

I've also stopped buying lunch at work and am either taking in home made food or having a cuppa soup and bread and have started doing my veg shopping down the market and batch cooking instead of relying solely on ready meals/pre-prepared food.

Travel-wise I've purchased a top up card - which makes any bus fares slightly cheaper than if paying by cash, but have set a budget for the year, and the plan is to get back into walking to and from work - only half an hour but it's that last 10 minutes that seem to disappear of a morning...

I have allowed for some leisure spending of £100 per month which includes meals, theatres etc. I recognise this is not necessarily a necessity and I am going to try to come in below it. I recognise that I need a balance, it can't be all partying but if it is all work then you aren't living in any way and there is nothing to look forward to. I've done both extremes previously and neither worked. So the aim is to be frugal as possible but have the odd nice thing to look forward to but see if savings can be made in any way. The plan is to allow a small percentage (I'm currently thinking 5% of anything I earn in addition to my current salary) towards a 'fun' fund, so I see some reward/incentive for hard work - and the aim is for this to be put towards - hopefully - another weekend away.

I'm also setting myself a fairly high target of 200 NSDs for this year. I managed around 100 last year and I know I can improve on that - and it definitely makes me more reluctant to spend and think twice before spending money - even if only for 24 hours.

How I'm doing so far...
Admittedly the budget has already gone slightly awry

I fell off the wagon was buying some items on ebay - a couple of pairs of trousers, a pair of long boots and a pair of flat ankle boots - which are all practical and fit with my aim at a smaller capsule wardrobe longer term. But then splurged on some matching shoes, bag and belt. Admittedly they fit with the idea of a smaller wardrobe and accessorising to make different outfits (and they go with all items planned) (and I recognise I'm kidding myself slightly here!) but I paid about 25% of the price they would have been and it adds the 'polish' to the capsule wardrobe pulling it together, if that makes any sense. But the plan now is to just sell with the exception of replacing or repairing worn out items.

There has been a little front loading on the grocery side. I've stocked up on pet food and store cupboard items to make use of vouchers and bulk buy discounts as they are items that will get used. I went through my cupboards the other day and have a list of food I have (some of it past its BBE date but will be fine to use in the most part) and have ordered some items from Approved Food. Also been down the market for veg and have done some batch cooking, so filling the freezer so I have no excuse to buy those ready meals when I'm feeling lazy/tired.

I also have a few tickets for plays etc to buy in the coming weeks - these were organised in part historically before I decided on major budget overhaul and whilst I have cancelled some, and am being very selective of what I say yes to now, I also recognise that to not socialise at all will make me very reclusive and isolated which is a place I tend to spend in - so it's all about balance! I used to spend a fortune and included fine dining etc in that, now it's a bit more budget and I make use of deals and collect loyalty points, but I'm trying to come up with that happy balance where I have treats to look forward to so don't feel like I'm just slogging away. I've also included a weekend hiking trip in the UK, with travel, accommodation and food it will be about £150 - but I do feel it is necessary to have at least one 'holiday' from things where it is not a staycation - as it helps me to gain perspective and recharge. I did 4 years of working constantly (holidays at 2 jobs rarely coincided) and it was incredibly difficult and did impact on my health.

Wow! That is a much longer post than I intended to write. I wasn't sure about 'putting it out there' and laying myself bare but I do feel it is necessary for me to break the cycle. It is also quite cathartic to write it all down in black and white.

I'm not writing this for anyone but myself and my accountability as I can't deny if it is out in public - but on the off-chance someone does read it and has any ideas on where I can cut back further, or make extra money, please let me know.