Father/Stepmother Divorce - Advice Needed Please!

24

Comments

  • kazwookie
    kazwookie Posts: 13,834 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary Photogenic First Post
    1. He need to go and make a new WILL now, via a solicitor, telling them what his wishes are, then checking it before signing it.

    2. Does his wife have access to his bank accounts? if so I suggest that is limited, ie only money for the month in it, he needs to change any passwords / pin numbers the wife might know, as I am sure this is going to get nasty.
    Also make sure the bank accounts do NOT have an overdraft facility on them.

    3. If he wants to get divorced he needs to go and get advise from a solicitor, half hour is normally free

    If his house is part of his work, what is he planning to do when he leaves work ie where is he going to live, even if he wasn't thinking of a divorced
    Breast Cancer Now 2022 100 miles October 100 / 100miles
    Sun, Sea

    2024 7/28 lbs to go.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    Keep_pedalling wrote: »
    She will be able to claim, but their is no guarantee that she will be successful, and she may not challenge it so the will should still be made.

    It would be very unusual for a wife who is being financially supported by her husband not to get a settlement.

    If they have already separated, the award might be less.
  • Newly_retired
    Newly_retired Posts: 2,950 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post
    This might help in terms of inheritance if your dad were to unfortunately die without a valid will.
    https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/death-and-wills/who-can-inherit-if-there-is-no-will-the-rules-of-intestacy/
    This resource has lots of information about what happens to finances after divorce, as well as other aspects.
    https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/family/ending-a-relationship/
    Have a good read before advising your dad to see a solicitor. A free half hour isn’t much, but can be useful if he goes with specific questions.
  • unholyangel
    unholyangel Posts: 16,863 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    16confused wrote: »
    "His wife has a right to be supported by an inheritance from her husband. If he dies before they divorce and he has written a new will leaving everything to someone else, she will be able to successfully claim on his estate."

    This sounds logical that she would need to be on the will but why would she successfully claim on the estate?

    In the press you regularly hear about cases where people die and the spouse or children find out that they didn't receive everything as they assumed they would.

    Perhaps he should make the will out to her, myself and my siblings. If the estate were divided equally between the four of us how could she then claim that she were due more if it were in his will on this basis?

    Either way I certainly hope he has a few more years ahead of him to be able to divorce and have some kind of happiness in retirement.

    Its not so much she has a right to be on the will. Even if she's put in the will, she can still contest it on the same grounds - that it failed to make adequate provision for her. Whats adequate can vary depending on circumstance.

    Also, you'd need more than loitering around the house if he wants to claim unreasonable behaviour (which of course, the other side can contest). Otherwise you're looking at 2 years separation with consent of the wife or 5 years without. Assuming england.
    You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means - Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride
  • 16confused
    16confused Posts: 40 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post
    He's been very unwell recently but has now largely recovered. She did little to help whilst he was ill. Wouldn't even come to the hospital when he had blood tests/MRI etc.

    This triggered more "life is too short" thoughts for him. Time to do something about it.
  • 16confused
    16confused Posts: 40 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post
    unholyangel wrote: »
    Its not so much she has a right to be on the will. Even if she's put in the will, she can still contest it on the same grounds - that it failed to make adequate provision for her. Whats adequate can vary depending on circumstance.

    Also, you'd need more than loitering around the house if he wants to claim unreasonable behaviour (which of course, the other side can contest). Otherwise you're looking at 2 years separation with consent of the wife or 5 years without. Assuming england.

    That's interesting regarding the 2 year separation.
    She hasn't cheated on him or been physically or verbally abusive and so probably couldn't claim unreasonable behaviour.
    She does refuse to speak to visitors when they come to the house. When I go there she goes straight up to her room and locks the door and generally makes any visitor seem unwelcome.
    She also doesn't wash and refuses to clean the house. She basically sits in front of the TV all day.
    As I say above this probably isn't enough to be considered unreasonable but hopefuly gives his story some credibility?
  • 16confused
    16confused Posts: 40 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post
    chesky wrote: »
    You say you hope he has 'a few more years'. For goodness sake, he's only 66 - he could easily have another twenty or thirty years.

    He's been very unwell recently but has now largely recovered. She did little to help whilst he was ill. Wouldn't even come to the hospital when he had blood tests/MRI etc. After all he's done for her and her family.

    This triggered more "life is too short" thoughts for him. Time to do something about it.

    He could definitely live 20 more years. Not like that though.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    16confused wrote: »
    She does refuse to speak to visitors when they come to the house. When I go there she goes straight up to her room and locks the door and generally makes any visitor seem unwelcome.

    She also doesn't wash and refuses to clean the house. She basically sits in front of the TV all day.

    As I say above this probably isn't enough to be considered unreasonable but hopefuly gives his story some credibility?

    Considering the hours your Dad was working, this behaviour is unreasonable, particularly not doing even a share of the household chores.
  • swingaloo
    swingaloo Posts: 2,708 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post
    Why does he not simple retire and rent himself a small flat and simply leave her. There are no small children to pay maintenance for so she and her daughter will have to fend for themselves.

    He doesn't need to start divorce proceedings straight away, just tell her he is leaving her.
  • Gavin83
    Gavin83 Posts: 8,744 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    16confused wrote: »
    My dad has very little savings but does have asset of around £50k and a private pension of £70k that he has been paying into for 50 years. Its doubtful that his wife has anything as she has never worked apart from the few years that she helped my dad out without the business.

    Financially what would she be entitled given that the majority of what money he has was accrued was accumulated before they got together. When he and my mum divorced he was left with c£100k and now has less than this s the business has not well and he has essentially been keeping her daughter (she has rarely worked and when she has has contributed nothing). Surely she can't expect to have half his assets given the short miserable marriage and that all of the wealth was accumulated before they got together.

    Everyone seems to be focusing on the will which is the smaller issue IMO so I'll address the other important point.

    Honestly, while borderline they've been married for 5 years, it's unlikely to be considered a short marriage. The happiness of the marriage is irrelevant, as is who paid in what. It's extremely likely she'll be entitled to half the assets, so around £70k.

    Sorry, I know it's not what you want to hear but it's the most likely outcome. Your dad has made a very expensive mistake.

    They'll need to come to an arrangement regarding how the amount is paid. She may well end up getting a portion of his pension each week or she'll receive all of the assets plus a bit. It could go any way.
This discussion has been closed.
★ ★ ★ Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 343K Banking & Borrowing
  • 250K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 449.6K Spending & Discounts
  • 235.1K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 607.8K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 173K Life & Family
  • 247.8K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.9K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards