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  • FIRST POST
    • w00519772
    • By w00519772 7th Jun 19, 5:37 PM
    • 1,280Posts
    • 215Thanks
    w00519772
    Problems with a colleague
    • #1
    • 7th Jun 19, 5:37 PM
    Problems with a colleague 7th Jun 19 at 5:37 PM
    We recruited a new member of staff nine months ago. She is ok at her job.

    I have worked in my current role for 12 years and am now a valued member of staff due to my technical ability. We have had problems with this member of staff because of her attitude. She is rude and disruptive to everyone. I am fed up of the number of complaints I am receiving from colleagues and customers. I am not her line manager.

    I find her difficult to work with and I work the most with her (in comparison to everyone else within the department). In deed many of my colleagues have said that they avoid her altogether (lucky them!). I spoke to my line manager (head of department) about this yesterday in my 121 and he said he will put her on report because he has also had complaints from many colleagues and customers.

    I believe this will happen within the next few weeks. Is there anything I need to do to "prepare" for this, bearing in mind that I work directly with this person. I have never been in this situation before and hence the reason for the question.

    I am a member of a trade union (for many years) if that makes any difference. Should I contact them? I would be very grateful to hear from others who were in my situation at some point.
Page 1
    • Brynsam
    • By Brynsam 7th Jun 19, 5:59 PM
    • 2,310 Posts
    • 1,741 Thanks
    Brynsam
    • #2
    • 7th Jun 19, 5:59 PM
    • #2
    • 7th Jun 19, 5:59 PM
    You're lucky if this is the first time you have encountered an individual of this type. The unhelpful answer is that there's nothing much you can do to 'prepare' - with even luck she might decide to move on, or the company will help her on her way. If she doesn't/they don't, your options are to grow a thicker skin, or to move on yourself (unfair, but if you can't cope with this sort of tiresome person, there aren't any realistic alternatives).
    • JReacher1
    • By JReacher1 7th Jun 19, 6:00 PM
    • 3,226 Posts
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    JReacher1
    • #3
    • 7th Jun 19, 6:00 PM
    • #3
    • 7th Jun 19, 6:00 PM
    Sounds like you are not this persons superior so I think you have done the right thing by raising a grievance with your manager.

    I would not do anything else now as it is your managers responsibility to deal with this.
    • Les79
    • By Les79 7th Jun 19, 6:23 PM
    • 1,435 Posts
    • 1,573 Thanks
    Les79
    • #4
    • 7th Jun 19, 6:23 PM
    • #4
    • 7th Jun 19, 6:23 PM
    I would be interested to know what she has been doing/saying to be fair...

    Only because sometimes it is challenging to join an established team (12 years) if you aren't a complete personality fit. It can, on occasion, give rise to unfair treatment by the existing staff when they give them the "cold shoulder" etc. This can, in turn, exasperate the initial issue and give rise to a situation where the employee is "managed out" but framed to look like it was THEIR fault because they are getting frustrated. That's all despite them being "ok at her job" (you might be biased and lowered that assessment accordingly, so there's every chance she's BETTER than ok).

    If your manager is decent, and if there isn't a gross misconduct issue/fundamental loss of trust knocking around, then the employee should be given the opportunity to address the behaviours that are not acceptable. And you should keep your mind open and be willing to build bridges if said employee takes them up on the offer. Aside from that, wait patiently for them to be managed out.

    I would also be hopeful that THEY were a union member and contacted them. Mainly to ensure that the correct processes are followed and that they have representation.

    Whilst you may have a clear picture in your head about what you want, the reality is that this is someone's livelihood we are talking about.
    • MarkN88
    • By MarkN88 7th Jun 19, 7:55 PM
    • 1,062 Posts
    • 634 Thanks
    MarkN88
    • #5
    • 7th Jun 19, 7:55 PM
    • #5
    • 7th Jun 19, 7:55 PM
    On report? Sounds like been back at school.
    • panika
    • By panika 9th Jun 19, 9:23 AM
    • 138 Posts
    • 139 Thanks
    panika
    • #6
    • 9th Jun 19, 9:23 AM
    • #6
    • 9th Jun 19, 9:23 AM
    I completely agree with Les79. So far we have heard your part of the story and we don't know what's your colleague is doing to upset everyone around. It is really up to your manager note.
    I am surprised he decided to "put her up on report" (whatever it means). I think a chat with her about this situation would be correct action to explain what behaviour are not acceptable and to hear her side of the story.
    I know for myself, that coming to work into "well establish group" can be hard to fit into, because people are used to do/work certain ways and it is hard to accept that someone new work a bit different, but still right way or has different personality then the rest of the team and that is seen as wrongdoing.
    Last edited by panika; 09-06-2019 at 9:26 AM. Reason: Typo
    • haras_nosirrah
    • By haras_nosirrah 9th Jun 19, 1:40 PM
    • 2,015 Posts
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    haras_nosirrah
    • #7
    • 9th Jun 19, 1:40 PM
    • #7
    • 9th Jun 19, 1:40 PM
    Is there the potential to be any kind of social communication disorder E. G aspergers with this member of staff?

    Hands up I am an aspie. It makes me very good at my job in that I am very passionate about my job and therefore am very focused on it. Where is struggle is change as if things don't make sense to me then I struggle to do it and social communication with others in that I don't read people very well. I have what some may call 'foot in mouth' so occasionally say things where I accidentally upset people (with no malice on my part)
    • w00519772
    • By w00519772 9th Jun 19, 7:31 PM
    • 1,280 Posts
    • 215 Thanks
    w00519772
    • #8
    • 9th Jun 19, 7:31 PM
    • #8
    • 9th Jun 19, 7:31 PM
    I completely agree with Les79. So far we have heard your part of the story and we don't know what's your colleague is doing to upset everyone around. It is really up to your manager note.
    I am surprised he decided to "put her up on report" (whatever it means). I think a chat with her about this situation would be correct action to explain what behaviour are not acceptable and to hear her side of the story.
    I know for myself, that coming to work into "well establish group" can be hard to fit into, because people are used to do/work certain ways and it is hard to accept that someone new work a bit different, but still right way or has different personality then the rest of the team and that is seen as wrongdoing.
    Originally posted by panika
    I completely agree with this. When I started the group was quite established at the time and I know it can be challenging to fit in and become a valued member. I have really tried with this member of staff and have passed a lot of knowledge onto her. I get on with her the best, however it really is hard work.

    However, this person swears; slams her hand on the table when talking to people; shouts; ignores people and is rude to customers. She has alienated a lot of people within the department who we have to work closely with. I find myself having to apologise for her otherwise we will lose the support of our colleagues. She is ok (average) at her job, however there is always a tense atmosphere when she is around as we are all treading on egg shells.

    She was spoken to twice in the past by the head of department after complaints from customers and other members of staff (not by me). However, things have not changed - in fact they have got worse.
    Last edited by w00519772; 09-06-2019 at 8:43 PM.
  • archived user
    • #9
    • 10th Jun 19, 8:10 AM
    • #9
    • 10th Jun 19, 8:10 AM
    We recruited a new member of staff nine months ago. She is ok at her job.

    I have worked in my current role for 12 years and am now a valued member of staff due to my technical ability. We have had problems with this member of staff because of her attitude. She is rude and disruptive to everyone. I am fed up of the number of complaints I am receiving from colleagues and customers. I am not her line manager.

    I find her difficult to work with and I work the most with her (in comparison to everyone else within the department). In deed many of my colleagues have said that they avoid her altogether (lucky them!). I spoke to my line manager (head of department) about this yesterday in my 121 and he said he will put her on report because he has also had complaints from many colleagues and customers.

    I believe this will happen within the next few weeks. Is there anything I need to do to "prepare" for this, bearing in mind that I work directly with this person. I have never been in this situation before and hence the reason for the question.

    I am a member of a trade union (for many years) if that makes any difference. Should I contact them? I would be very grateful to hear from others who were in my situation at some point.
    Originally posted by w00519772

    Read: When I Say No, I feel Guilty.


    Brilliant advice on being assertive and standing your ground in the workplace.
    • Dox
    • By Dox 10th Jun 19, 8:41 AM
    • 1,640 Posts
    • 1,238 Thanks
    Dox
    If the situation is as you describe it, why is management doing so little? Is this colleague likely to complain of discrimination if she is sacked (always assuming she fits in to one of the categories which would meet the unlawful discrimination category and thus wouldn't need two years of employment).
    • getmore4less
    • By getmore4less 10th Jun 19, 9:06 AM
    • 37,466 Posts
    • 23,136 Thanks
    getmore4less
    She is rude and disruptive to everyone. I am fed up of the number of complaints I am receiving from colleagues and customers. I am not her line manager.
    Refer everyone to her boss.

    As soon as anyone starts a moan refer them with no apologies or anything just cut them of with "you will have to talk to X to deal with that issue"
    • w00519772
    • By w00519772 10th Jun 19, 6:10 PM
    • 1,280 Posts
    • 215 Thanks
    w00519772
    Read: When I Say No, I feel Guilty.


    Brilliant advice on being assertive and standing your ground in the workplace.
    Originally posted by andydownes123
    I don't know what you mean by this. Could you clarify?
    • nicechap
    • By nicechap 10th Jun 19, 8:08 PM
    • 1,873 Posts
    • 3,275 Thanks
    nicechap
    I don't know what you mean by this. Could you clarify?
    Originally posted by w00519772
    I suspect they means:

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/When-Say-Feel-Guilty-Systematic/dp/0553263900
    Originally Posted by shortcrust
    "Contact the Ministry of Fairness....If sufficient evidence of unfairness is discovered you’ll get an apology, a permanent contract with backdated benefits, a ‘Let’s Make it Fair!’ tshirt and mug, and those guilty of unfairness will be sent on a Fairness Awareness course."
  • archived user

    Yep - that's the kidder
    • w00519772
    • By w00519772 13th Jun 19, 7:06 AM
    • 1,280 Posts
    • 215 Thanks
    w00519772
    Should I be speaking to Unison about this?
    • k3lvc
    • By k3lvc 13th Jun 19, 9:25 AM
    • 2,755 Posts
    • 4,502 Thanks
    k3lvc
    Should I be speaking to Unison about this?
    Originally posted by w00519772

    Why would you speak to Unison ? What do you think they're going to do ?

    You've escalated to the Line Manager involved - let them get on with handling the situation
    • MoneySavingNovice
    • By MoneySavingNovice 13th Jun 19, 12:12 PM
    • 356 Posts
    • 368 Thanks
    MoneySavingNovice
    .....However, this person swears; slams her hand on the table when talking to people; shouts; ignores people and is rude to customers. She has alienated a lot of people within the department who we have to work closely with......

    My thought on reading the above is that this person might have symptoms of Asperger syndrome.



    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger_syndrome


    While this obviously at best a guess this might explain some of the issues.

    • w00519772
    • By w00519772 13th Jun 19, 5:56 PM
    • 1,280 Posts
    • 215 Thanks
    w00519772
    Why would you speak to Unison ? What do you think they're going to do ?

    You've escalated to the Line Manager involved - let them get on with handling the situation
    Originally posted by k3lvc
    No reason. My manager has said he supports me. However, I have never been in this position before so exploring all options.
    • eamon
    • By eamon 13th Jun 19, 6:09 PM
    • 1,890 Posts
    • 1,335 Thanks
    eamon
    To the OP you have mentioned your concerns to your manager. We can guess until the cows come re your colleagues personalty etc and still be none the wiser. Its best that you let management do what they feel necessary.
    • Les79
    • By Les79 13th Jun 19, 6:27 PM
    • 1,435 Posts
    • 1,573 Thanks
    Les79
    Should I be speaking to Unison about this?
    Originally posted by w00519772
    Don't think there'd be any harm in speaking to them if you want. One pro I can think of is that, if this somehow backfires on you (which I'd be very surprised as long as you don't do anything silly), they'll be sort of aware of the issue and can advise.

    But I don't really see what they'll tell you beyond what you've been told here.
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