18yr old birthday & pocket money

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  • Fire_Fox
    Fire_Fox Posts: 26,026 Forumite
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    mutley74 wrote: »
    When he was younger we had some great holidays together to the Far East and Spain. Always told him we should go anywhere in the World together in school holidays whilst I am lucky to afford this. Typical lad more interested in gaming than holidays.

    Paying for driving lessons of his choice of instructor seems like a good choice.

    Tell him again: if he is not interested pay for driving lessons.
    Declutterbug-in-progress.⭐️⭐️⭐️ ⭐️⭐️
  • ViolaLass
    ViolaLass Posts: 5,764 Forumite
    I would start by taking him out for a meal and seeing what he talked about.
  • mutley74
    mutley74 Posts: 4,022 Forumite
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    he wants driving lessons paid for and a car. I said I can buy lessons, even pay for an intensive driving course, but not a car, but he can get some money towards a new phone. Ever since he has not talked me and sulked about the car!
  • kazwookie
    kazwookie Posts: 13,836 Forumite
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    Meet up with him for a meal and a drink and ask him
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  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,655 Forumite
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    mutley74 wrote: »
    he wants driving lessons paid for and a car. I said I can buy lessons, even pay for an intensive driving course, but not a car, but he can get some money towards a new phone. Ever since he has not talked me and sulked about the car!

    Entitled much...?
    Doesn't sound like a nice person.
  • maman
    maman Posts: 28,571 Forumite
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    mutley74 wrote: »
    he wants driving lessons paid for and a car. I said I can buy lessons, even pay for an intensive driving course, but not a car, but he can get some money towards a new phone. Ever since he has not talked me and sulked about the car!

    It's a shame he feels like that but stick to your guns. My DD drove my car when she first passed but DGD was given a car although she didn't ask.

    You've not said whether your son is a student or working. His circumstances will influence whether he could run a car or even needs one plus the answer to the previous question about maintenance.
  • mutley74
    mutley74 Posts: 4,022 Forumite
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    maman wrote: »
    You've not said whether your son is a student or working. His circumstances will influence whether he could run a car or even needs one plus the answer to the previous question about maintenance.

    he is a student (A Levels) probably wants to goto Uni.
  • maman
    maman Posts: 28,571 Forumite
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    mutley74 wrote: »
    he is a student (A Levels) probably wants to goto Uni.

    I'd say that unless he's planning to carry on living with his grandparents and commute while at university he won't need a car.

    As for the maintenance : what does he do for 'pocket money' at the moment? Do his grandparents give him something from the maintenance money? Next year if he has to pay for student halls\house plus all his food etc he'll need to start budgeting the money you give him plus his student loan. I'd suggest you do start paying the money to him but not until you've talked to his grandparents about how much they'll need for his rent. He'll also need to learn how to look after himself such as cooking and laundry.

    I'd get over his birthday first though and introduce the new finances later because he's going to university rather than because he's 18.
  • Savvy_Sue
    Savvy_Sue Posts: 46,014 Forumite
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    maman wrote: »
    I'd say that unless he's planning to carry on living with his grandparents and commute while at university he won't need a car.
    Even if he's doing that, he may find he can't park the car at or even near Uni ...
    Signature removed for peace of mind
  • in_my_wellies
    in_my_wellies Posts: 1,647 Forumite
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    DS2 son learnt at 18 only in the instructors car. Went to uni for 7 years, no need for a car or anywhere to park one. He was 26 when he got a job and needed to drive. I sat with him for a few miles then we did motorway driving and it soon came back to him.
    We were both relieved he didn't have to start learning when he was 26

    DS1 refused to learn at 18 then needed to do an intensive course when he was suddenly offered a job abroad and realised it was easier to learn here
    Love living in a village in the country side
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