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  • FIRST POST
    • Waves and Smiles
    • By Waves and Smiles 17th Mar 16, 5:23 PM
    • 5,173Posts
    • 22,086Thanks
    Waves and Smiles
    Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3
    • #1
    • 17th Mar 16, 5:23 PM
    Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3 17th Mar 16 at 5:23 PM
    This thread is a continuation of The Mental Health thread “Here we can all be heard for a little while Part 2”. The previous thread can be found here-

    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5320917&page=501

    I started the original thread when I was lonely and suffering with mental health issues and was lucky to find a wonderful group of amazing new friends who now mean the world to me. My name was Worried and Scared back then but with the help of everyone here I became Waves and Smiles. This thread is no longer just about me, it is about all of us and for anyone who needs mental health support, their carers and anyone who is interested in learning more. Sometimes we speak seriously, sometimes we offer gentle advice and a lot of the time we laugh together. Sometimes I write mini-novels about my experiences of living with complex mental illness. What is important is everyone here is there for each other. New posters are welcome to join in, or just lurk (we call them humming birds because they hover!) if they would prefer. This is a place without judgement or pressure, and a safe place for everyone. We try to keep abbreviations to a minimum but if there are some that you do not understand please ask.

    Sir Pugliet is our Good Mental Health pug! You may notice that he is mentioned from time to time, he is a little cuddly pug toy that was sent to me by a friend on the thread. He is something of a celebrity now!


    Hugs and warm handshakes, or finger squishes, whichever you prefer.

    Also, please take a look at the following links which offer great advice written by the lovely people at MSE!

    http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/news/family/2016/03/martin-lewis-launches-new-money--mental-health-policy-institute

    http://blog.moneysavingexpert.com/2016/05/16/the-money-and-mental-health-policy-institute-whatll-it-really-do

    http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/credit-cards/mental-health-guide
    Last edited by Waves and Smiles; 17-05-2016 at 10:29 AM.
    Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened - Anatole France

    If I knew that the world would end tomorrow, I would still plant apple trees today - Martin Luther King
Page 542
    • Stoke
    • By Stoke 11th Feb 19, 12:47 PM
    • 3,070 Posts
    • 3,435 Thanks
    Stoke
    Hope everything is okay Iza.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 11th Feb 19, 1:16 PM
    • 40,417 Posts
    • 149,248 Thanks
    Pyxis
    How are you doing, Stoke?
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    • Stoke
    • By Stoke 11th Feb 19, 1:53 PM
    • 3,070 Posts
    • 3,435 Thanks
    Stoke
    How are you doing, Stoke?
    Originally posted by Pyxis
    One day at a time! It's the best way I've found of coping really. Last week felt like it was one of the worst of my life, but it's been and gone now and this week is fresh and new. Small wins again.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 11th Feb 19, 1:58 PM
    • 40,417 Posts
    • 149,248 Thanks
    Pyxis
    one day at a time! It's the best way i've found of coping really. Last week felt like it was one of the worst of my life, but it's been and gone now and this week is fresh and new. Small wins again.
    Originally posted by stoke
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    • Izadora
    • By Izadora 11th Feb 19, 5:44 PM
    • 1,626 Posts
    • 4,815 Thanks
    Izadora
    I feel so hopeless and useless and all I want is my mum.
    I'm trying really hard to keep it together but it feels so pointless at the moment. My lovely, independent, caring mum is pretty much a shell and I don't know whether the rare glimpses of something similar to her are encouraging or one of the cruelest forms of torture going.
    IzHe, my mates and work are all being lovely and very understanding but I just want to know when it's going to stop hurting this much.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 12th Feb 19, 4:32 AM
    • 40,417 Posts
    • 149,248 Thanks
    Pyxis
    ((((((((((((Izzie))))))))))))))

    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    • heartbreak_star
    • By heartbreak_star 12th Feb 19, 8:34 AM
    • 7,782 Posts
    • 17,205 Thanks
    heartbreak_star
    Oh Izadora. All the love in the world.

    HBS x
    I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another.

    #Starmer4PM
    • Stoke
    • By Stoke 12th Feb 19, 1:59 PM
    • 3,070 Posts
    • 3,435 Thanks
    Stoke
    I feel so hopeless and useless and all I want is my mum.
    I'm trying really hard to keep it together but it feels so pointless at the moment. My lovely, independent, caring mum is pretty much a shell and I don't know whether the rare glimpses of something similar to her are encouraging or one of the cruelest forms of torture going.
    IzHe, my mates and work are all being lovely and very understanding but I just want to know when it's going to stop hurting this much.
    Originally posted by Izadora
    My issues pale into insignificance when I read that. Genuinely hope things pick up.
    • calleyw
    • By calleyw 12th Feb 19, 2:05 PM
    • 8,972 Posts
    • 16,418 Thanks
    calleyw
    I feel so hopeless and useless and all I want is my mum.
    I'm trying really hard to keep it together but it feels so pointless at the moment. My lovely, independent, caring mum is pretty much a shell and I don't know whether the rare glimpses of something similar to her are encouraging or one of the cruelest forms of torture going.
    IzHe, my mates and work are all being lovely and very understanding but I just want to know when it's going to stop hurting this much.
    Originally posted by Izadora

    Izadora,


    Massive hugs.



    Its hard. It was horrid hearing my husband during recovery in hospital, (before the stroke he was an archer) saying he wanted to be robin hood. it still makes me cry to think about that today all this time on.


    Recovery from a stroke is a long road. It takes time and I know this sounds very strange to say but very tiring for the person. You mum may need a note pad and pen as she may find communicating difficult. Even pictures on a laminated piece of paper. With pictures of food, drink etc on so she can point if she is unable to speak.


    I wish you mum a quick recovery.


    Yours


    Calley x
    Hope for everything and expect nothing!!!

    Good enough is almost always good enough -Prof Barry Schwartz

    If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try -Seth Godin
    • Izadora
    • By Izadora 12th Feb 19, 4:25 PM
    • 1,626 Posts
    • 4,815 Thanks
    Izadora
    Thank you all for the good wishes. I was really in two minds about whether or not to go back to the hospital last night but I'm very glad I did. She's still an incredibly long way away from being herself but she was at least a bit more engaged.

    My issues pale into insignificance when I read that.
    Originally posted by Stoke
    Not to you they don't. Please don't ever feel that someone else having a shitty time somehow invalidates your issues. There are many people having a far worse time of it than I am at the moment but that doesn't make this any less awful for me.


    Recovery from a stroke is a long road. It takes time and I know this sounds very strange to say but very tiring for the person.
    Originally posted by calleyw
    It doesn't sound strange at all, I can see just how much effort she's having to put in to do something as simple as picking up a glass of water and it must be exhausting. It's one of the things that's worrying me about how much time dad's spending visiting her, I fear that she's trying to stay awake for him when she should be sleeping.

    You mum may need a note pad and pen as she may find communicating difficult. Even pictures on a laminated piece of paper. With pictures of food, drink etc on so she can point if she is unable to speak.
    Originally posted by calleyw
    Her communication, when she manages to be a part of the conversation rather than staring vacantly into space, is actually pretty good but thank you, I would never have thought of that for when the effort to talk/find the right word is too much.
    • calleyw
    • By calleyw 12th Feb 19, 5:15 PM
    • 8,972 Posts
    • 16,418 Thanks
    calleyw
    It doesn't sound strange at all, I can see just how much effort she's having to put in to do something as simple as picking up a glass of water and it must be exhausting. It's one of the things that's worrying me about how much time dad's spending visiting her, I fear that she's trying to stay awake for him when she should be sleeping.
    Originally posted by Izadora
    On my husbands stroke ward and in rehab everyone was put to bed to have a nap every afternoon.


    After a stroke parts of the brain have died due to either a bleed on the brain or a blockage. We take things we take for granted such as picking up a glass of water we do it automatically. You mum now has to think about it now. Rewiring of the brain takes time. Ask about exercises for the drop face and her effected arm and leg. As arms and legs muscles loss can be quick when there is no movement at all. Even if its passive, done by yourself or your dad it can help with the rewiring of her brain.


    Her communication, when she manages to be a part of the conversation rather than staring vacantly into space, is actually pretty good but thank you, I would never have thought of that for when the effort to talk/find the right word is too much.
    Originally posted by Izadora

    Thats good if she is talking that means her brain is processing stuff. I know its hard, but you need to slow the conversation down a bit, so she can process it and form her replies. But when they become tired it becomes too much hard work. And being able to either write or point to what they need help with. Another thing that might be of use is one of those write on wipe off things the childrens have to to draw on. If your mum is not too tired she could write on there. Its bigger than pad and paper making it easier for her to handle with one hand.


    As I said before. If you just need to chat or vent please do PM, I am more than happy to listen you.


    Yours


    Calley x
    Hope for everything and expect nothing!!!

    Good enough is almost always good enough -Prof Barry Schwartz

    If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try -Seth Godin
    • dandy-candy
    • By dandy-candy 12th Feb 19, 9:23 PM
    • 1,859 Posts
    • 9,691 Thanks
    dandy-candy
    Hugs to Iza and all who need them xx

    Not much to report but just thought I'd check in
    • xXMessedUpXx
    • By xXMessedUpXx 14th Feb 19, 10:09 PM
    • 17,340 Posts
    • 45,710 Thanks
    xXMessedUpXx
    Saw a doctor today, the letter the assessor sent him didn;t include what they decided on my medication so he said he;d get in touch with them to find out and that they should call me. They haven't. Got an appointment with some other doctor in march. So have to stay on current meds till then

    Right now i just feel completely defeated. Everytime i reach out another door slams in my face. Its just utterly pointless. If it wasn't for the fact i love Swain and couldn't put him through it, i'd be ready to give up at this point. (Don't worry i'm not gonna do anything stupid, it would devastate him and i can;t do that to him or anyone else who cares about me)


    They've put me forward for a bipolar educational group. They told me to ring IAPT but warned me it could be months before i'm seen. Got told to try MIND for counselling and as per usual their waiting lists are closed.

    I guess i'll just have to settle for a life of mental instability
    "Life Is Like A Beautiful Melody Only The Lyrics Are Messed Up"
    To see the rainbow you need both the sun and the rain to make its colours appear
    Weight loss attempt 23002 7lbs/127lbs lost
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 15th Feb 19, 6:55 AM
    • 40,417 Posts
    • 149,248 Thanks
    Pyxis
    Saw a doctor today, the letter the assessor sent him didn;t include what they decided on my medication so he said he;d get in touch with them to find out and that they should call me. They haven't. Got an appointment with some other doctor in march. So have to stay on current meds till then

    Right now i just feel completely defeated. Everytime i reach out another door slams in my face. Its just utterly pointless. If it wasn't for the fact i love Swain and couldn't put him through it, i'd be ready to give up at this point. (Don't worry i'm not gonna do anything stupid, it would devastate him and i can;t do that to him or anyone else who cares about me)


    They've put me forward for a bipolar educational group. They told me to ring IAPT but warned me it could be months before i'm seen. Got told to try MIND for counselling and as per usual their waiting lists are closed.

    I guess i'll just have to settle for a life of mental instability
    Originally posted by xXMessedUpXx
    It's unbelievable, MU.

    Do you feel strong enough to write to your MP about it? You are good at putting things in writing.

    You could also send a copy to the Health Minister.

    Plus, I would also write to the Queen. You'd be surprised at what happens when a letter to the Queen gets sent to the appropriate Minister, even though she can't personally step in.

    Governments have been promising sweeping changes to Mental Health provision for decades, starting when Tony Blair became PM, but it's been same old same old.
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
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