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  • FIRST POST
    • Waves and Smiles
    • By Waves and Smiles 17th Mar 16, 5:23 PM
    • 5,173Posts
    • 22,086Thanks
    Waves and Smiles
    Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3
    • #1
    • 17th Mar 16, 5:23 PM
    Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3 17th Mar 16 at 5:23 PM
    This thread is a continuation of The Mental Health thread “Here we can all be heard for a little while Part 2”. The previous thread can be found here-

    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5320917&page=501

    I started the original thread when I was lonely and suffering with mental health issues and was lucky to find a wonderful group of amazing new friends who now mean the world to me. My name was Worried and Scared back then but with the help of everyone here I became Waves and Smiles. This thread is no longer just about me, it is about all of us and for anyone who needs mental health support, their carers and anyone who is interested in learning more. Sometimes we speak seriously, sometimes we offer gentle advice and a lot of the time we laugh together. Sometimes I write mini-novels about my experiences of living with complex mental illness. What is important is everyone here is there for each other. New posters are welcome to join in, or just lurk (we call them humming birds because they hover!) if they would prefer. This is a place without judgement or pressure, and a safe place for everyone. We try to keep abbreviations to a minimum but if there are some that you do not understand please ask.

    Sir Pugliet is our Good Mental Health pug! You may notice that he is mentioned from time to time, he is a little cuddly pug toy that was sent to me by a friend on the thread. He is something of a celebrity now!


    Hugs and warm handshakes, or finger squishes, whichever you prefer.

    Also, please take a look at the following links which offer great advice written by the lovely people at MSE!

    http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/news/family/2016/03/martin-lewis-launches-new-money--mental-health-policy-institute

    http://blog.moneysavingexpert.com/2016/05/16/the-money-and-mental-health-policy-institute-whatll-it-really-do

    http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/credit-cards/mental-health-guide
    Last edited by Waves and Smiles; 17-05-2016 at 10:29 AM.
    Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened - Anatole France

    If I knew that the world would end tomorrow, I would still plant apple trees today - Martin Luther King
Page 537
    • onomatopoeia99
    • By onomatopoeia99 11th Jan 19, 7:30 AM
    • 5,349 Posts
    • 11,998 Thanks
    onomatopoeia99
    Gitdog looking enthusiastic and well behaved there!
    INTP, nerd, libertarian and scifi geek. Home is where my books are.

    5.2kWp system, SE facing, >1% shading, installed March 2019.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 11th Jan 19, 9:46 AM
    • 40,656 Posts
    • 150,471 Thanks
    Pyxis
    Yes, Gitdog looks like he's mastered the Dogagility after all, or does the camera lie?
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    • elsien
    • By elsien 11th Jan 19, 1:19 PM
    • 18,578 Posts
    • 47,140 Thanks
    elsien
    He's a bull terrier. He does it properly occasionally. If he can be arsed. Otherwise he makes up his own course or has a bit of a relax while pondering whether or not to carry on.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
    • heartbreak_star
    • By heartbreak_star 11th Jan 19, 2:20 PM
    • 7,828 Posts
    • 17,284 Thanks
    heartbreak_star
    Ahh those pics have made my day Elsien

    HBS x
    "I believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another."

    "It's easy to know what you're against, quite another to know what you're for."

    #Starmer4PM #Bremainer
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 11th Jan 19, 8:35 PM
    • 40,656 Posts
    • 150,471 Thanks
    Pyxis
    .

    Perhaps Gitdog could try singing and playing the piano instead?.............



    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    • Artytarty
    • By Artytarty 11th Jan 19, 10:09 PM
    • 2,283 Posts
    • 5,280 Thanks
    Artytarty
    Dandy Candy, your GP or dentist or similar may be happy to do this for you.
    Good luck.
    My GP gave me a ref for a volunteer job.
    Norn Iron Club member 473
    • dekaspace
    • By dekaspace 13th Jan 19, 12:37 AM
    • 4,822 Posts
    • 4,517 Thanks
    dekaspace
    I'm a bit panicky right now, when I came back at 7pm there was a few junkies congregating outside my flat obviously out of it, after 20 minutes I called police who moved them along but they came back 10 minutes later and shouted outside, and what sounded like my name.


    Then just after midnight had some rough guy walk through my garden and onto veranda and knock on door and window and when I peered out of curtain he saw me and shouted something.
    • Waves and Smiles
    • By Waves and Smiles 15th Jan 19, 1:36 PM
    • 5,173 Posts
    • 22,086 Thanks
    Waves and Smiles
    It is not encouraging when after your second PIP assessment the assessor says "I hope have done it right so you don't need another!" So do I...
    Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened - Anatole France

    If I knew that the world would end tomorrow, I would still plant apple trees today - Martin Luther King
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 15th Jan 19, 4:18 PM
    • 40,656 Posts
    • 150,471 Thanks
    Pyxis
    It is not encouraging when after your second PIP assessment the assessor says "I hope have done it right so you don't need another!" So do I...
    Originally posted by Waves and Smiles
    Has it been done now, WaS?
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    • jobbingmusician
    • By jobbingmusician 15th Jan 19, 10:44 PM
    • 19,476 Posts
    • 20,131 Thanks
    jobbingmusician
    OK, it's official that I am in some sort of a time warp. How can it possibly be so long since I've been on this thread?

    deka - that does sound horrid. Keep safe in your lovely home, and don't let the !!!!!!s grind you down!

    elsien - yay for Gitdog! And for his owner, who has shown great perseverance in training him!

    dandy - you've got friends here! Would it help if we put a testimonial together saying how helpful and supportive you are on this thread? Just an idea.....

    And AO - it's lovely to hear from you! Do post occasionally and carry on getting better!
    Last edited by jobbingmusician; 16-01-2019 at 12:04 AM.
    I'm the Board Guide on the Matched Betting; Referrers and Jobseeking & Training boards. I'm a volunteer to help the boards run smoothly, and I can move and merge posts there. Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.

    The good folk of the matched betting board are now (I hope!) supporting Macmillan, in memory of Fifigrace. Visit
    https://www.gofundme.com/running-the-leeds-10k-for-macmillan
    • Waves and Smiles
    • By Waves and Smiles 16th Jan 19, 1:00 AM
    • 5,173 Posts
    • 22,086 Thanks
    Waves and Smiles
    Love the Gitdog pics! He looks proud of himself!

    I hope it's all done now, Pyxis. The assessor told me there would be at least a 6 week before I hear the outcome but it seems to be out of my hands now. She seemed to suspect I have Bipolar as that is what all of her questions were pointing towards which was interesting. We shall see what happens next!
    Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened - Anatole France

    If I knew that the world would end tomorrow, I would still plant apple trees today - Martin Luther King
    • xXMessedUpXx
    • By xXMessedUpXx 16th Jan 19, 9:27 PM
    • 17,351 Posts
    • 45,717 Thanks
    xXMessedUpXx
    I'm taking a bit of a break from the forums (and social media-i havent posted for a week on facebook and feel quite liberated )

    To summarise, 2 weeks agoi had a 4hr long panic attack that led to me spending an hour n the walk in center (massive thanks to the staff as they were so kind and understanding), saw doctor, ant depressend has been decreased, don;t feel as manic now...its more a manageable hypomania, if this doesn't work they might be adding another medication, no idea of any of that has sped up my mental health assessment but got a letter saying i was on the waiting list. Hopefully it comes through soon.

    I've realised (especially when im up) that i struggle with communication and boundaries and often say more about myself than i should online. It might partly be paranoia but i feel i need to scale it back a bit and take back some anonymity.

    I'll keeo checking in on you guys, but if im not posting this is why.
    "Life Is Like A Beautiful Melody Only The Lyrics Are Messed Up"
    To see the rainbow you need both the sun and the rain to make its colours appear
    Weight loss attempt 23002 7lbs/127lbs lost
    • jobbingmusician
    • By jobbingmusician 16th Jan 19, 9:30 PM
    • 19,476 Posts
    • 20,131 Thanks
    jobbingmusician
    Well done MU, and welcome to the land of hummingbirds. Sounds like that is the right decision for you at the moment.

    And congratulations - a four hour panic attack must be horrendous, but it sounds as if you were able to use appropriate help very well, and come out the other side. Hopefully your meds will help stablise soon and life will improve xxx
    I'm the Board Guide on the Matched Betting; Referrers and Jobseeking & Training boards. I'm a volunteer to help the boards run smoothly, and I can move and merge posts there. Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.

    The good folk of the matched betting board are now (I hope!) supporting Macmillan, in memory of Fifigrace. Visit
    https://www.gofundme.com/running-the-leeds-10k-for-macmillan
    • Waves and Smiles
    • By Waves and Smiles 17th Jan 19, 4:20 PM
    • 5,173 Posts
    • 22,086 Thanks
    Waves and Smiles
    Take care, MU. I will be thinking of you, you know where we are if you need us. xx
    Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened - Anatole France

    If I knew that the world would end tomorrow, I would still plant apple trees today - Martin Luther King
    • calleyw
    • By calleyw 18th Jan 19, 10:15 AM
    • 8,995 Posts
    • 16,458 Thanks
    calleyw
    Morning My lovelies,


    Hugs and squishes and handshakes all round.


    Not been around much due to having a stinking cold. On the tail end but its still throwing in the odd surprise such as dizziness now. And stairs are my nemesis now. I know I am unfit but walking upstairs is puffing me out



    MU I think that social media is really bad for MH. People touting a perfect life. yeah pull the other one.


    After blocking on my phone the knob who messed up my MH has tracked down my face book profile And sent me a friends request. This man must be beyond stupid!!!!! I have declined and blocked him so my profile should no longer be able to be seen by him. He is the cause of 80% of my MH issues. Why oh why would I let him back in my life. I last saw him in may 2016!!!!!



    My biggest worry is that he will turn up on the door step. So from now on when someone knocks on the door I will look out the up stairs bedroom window to see who it is. And decide if to to answer it.


    Everyone take care


    Yours


    Calley x
    Hope for everything and expect nothing!!!

    Good enough is almost always good enough -Prof Barry Schwartz

    If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try -Seth Godin
    • Amberkitten5
    • By Amberkitten5 22nd Jan 19, 11:12 PM
    • 11 Posts
    • 51 Thanks
    Amberkitten5
    ((((((Torry Quine))))))
    • xXMessedUpXx
    • By xXMessedUpXx 23rd Jan 19, 9:50 PM
    • 17,351 Posts
    • 45,717 Thanks
    xXMessedUpXx
    Ok i know i said i was taking a break, but i had a letter come through and my MH assessment is on 4th feb. I'm bricking it. I'm scared of the fact that they may just turn around and say they can't help me. I've been fighting for 5 years for this and now its happening i'm scared I feel like i do need more help, i think i need a psych to deal with the medication side and a cpn to deal with my episodes. But i know mh services are stretched to breaking point and i may not be "severe" enough, but i feel my bipolar is getting worse, my episode are getting more severe and more frequent (last yeah i was "stable" for a grand total of 6 weeks), and my anxiety has never been treated and thats becoming more of an issue. I've long suspected my bipolar is rapid cycling (due to the fact most people only have about 4 episodes A YEAR) but never been asssessed for that.

    Sorry im rambeling (still up ) but i figured if anyone would understand its you guys here.
    "Life Is Like A Beautiful Melody Only The Lyrics Are Messed Up"
    To see the rainbow you need both the sun and the rain to make its colours appear
    Weight loss attempt 23002 7lbs/127lbs lost
    • calleyw
    • By calleyw 23rd Jan 19, 10:45 PM
    • 8,995 Posts
    • 16,458 Thanks
    calleyw
    MU, massive hugs.


    Of course you are worried who would not be. Try not worry about if you are sick enough. They must think you need help as they would not have offered you the appointment.



    Does writing down all your worries help?


    Might be an idea to write down what has been happening over the last 6 months to a year. You can take it with you so you can show them what issues you have been having.


    Again another massive hug


    Yours


    Calley x
    Hope for everything and expect nothing!!!

    Good enough is almost always good enough -Prof Barry Schwartz

    If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try -Seth Godin
    • xXMessedUpXx
    • By xXMessedUpXx 24th Jan 19, 12:44 AM
    • 17,351 Posts
    • 45,717 Thanks
    xXMessedUpXx
    Thanks Calley


    i've been keeping a record of my moods since last june (long story short i have a twitter thats just for me and i can see my moods/state of mind from what ive posted) so if i take that it may help

    currently hypomanic...but i;ve tried to challenge it to good, ive been doetig the past 2 weeks and lost 5lbs and im startimg a zumba class next week. still on a break from social media
    "Life Is Like A Beautiful Melody Only The Lyrics Are Messed Up"
    To see the rainbow you need both the sun and the rain to make its colours appear
    Weight loss attempt 23002 7lbs/127lbs lost
    • Stoke
    • By Stoke 24th Jan 19, 11:23 AM
    • 3,072 Posts
    • 3,465 Thanks
    Stoke
    This is quite a heavy post, so apologies in advance.

    Last week, my nut doctor (as I like to call her) told me that we could stop seeing each other once a fortnight (it used to be once a week) and go to once a month. I was so proud. She told me I had come so far, I had a real control over my thoughts and actions and she knew I was getting there.

    Today, I am going to see her tonight. In the space of 5 days, my life has fallen apart and once again, I feel as though this weird sentient 'karma' is punishing me. Almost like some deity is out destroying my life, piece by piece. I don't hurt anyone. I don't steal or punch people on nights out. I don't rape or gamble old ladies pensions away. I just want to try to live my boring and incredibly unfulfilling life in peace. I'm 28, yet I want to see out my days alone. I would quite happily walk into the light, right now. I live in fear, constant fear. I fear life itself. I hadn't for a very long time because I started to wonder if it was all a case of just bad luck, but this goes beyond that. This felt so contrived that there's no other way than to truly believe there is something out there that is punishing me. I don't know why.

    I believe it has all come to this..... and if it goes one way, it will probably be the end for me. I walked out to my garage looking for a tow rope about 6 months ago, unfortunately (at the time) my dad had borrowed it. I slowly lifted myself back up and I'd not considered anything suicidal since.

    This is different, if this goes one way, I will finally feel that life has given me the sign that I need to live it to the fullest. Don't be afraid to say hello to that person you like but are too scared to speak to me. Put yourself out there, try and enjoy life, appreciate what you have and be grateful for what you've been given. Don't take things for granted. It'll actually be a lesson.

    If it goes the other way, it will be the end. My life will come crashing down before my eyes. I will most likely lose everything. That's not a lesson, that's a punishment.... for hurting nobody. A further punishment..... for hurting nobody. Do you know what my father said the other day? "You know, it could be worse, you could have cancer". Is that where my life has got to? It's so bad that I should be grateful because while my life is almost on the floor and I've decided "!!!! it, why bother" and I contemplate ending it, I shouldn't because at least I don't have an illness that would potentially kill me? I might as well go and grab some spice from dealers up in Manchester and knock about in a shop front door.... at least I don't have cancer.

    Do you know what I did last night? I've not done this since I was probably 10 years old.... I pretty much lost my faith after watching little children die on the news during Kosovo war in the nineties. I was only a child but I couldn't understand why 'God' would allow children to be harmed. I prayed last night..... A 28 year old, on his knees, by his bed, praying. I actually apologised for not 'speaking to him' for a long time and I prayed. Essentially, my life currently sits in whatever is punishing me's hands.

    At the end of the day, I'm currently on the ground..... my life is rock bottom again, except whereas 6 months ago it felt like rock bottom, THIS IS ROCK BOTTOM. If it goes one way, it will lift me off the ground and potentially change my life, it'll make me into a much better and happier person, a lesson to hold onto. If it goes the other way? It'll probably finally put me below the ground, perhaps where this was all heading to.

    Dark days. Very dark days for me right now. I think I will continue to pray. I have nothing else. An engineer, a guy who believes in science, logic, reason, begging something that potentially doesn't exist to spare his life.
    Last edited by Stoke; 24-01-2019 at 11:27 AM.
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