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  • FIRST POST
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 29th Dec 18, 8:41 AM
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    • 84,930Thanks
    lessonlearned
    Frump to Fab 2019 - Here We Go Again
    • #1
    • 29th Dec 18, 8:41 AM
    Frump to Fab 2019 - Here We Go Again 29th Dec 18 at 8:41 AM
    Good Morning Lovely Ladies (And Gents - if are are reading along).

    Are you ready to start the New Year with a sparkle in your eye and a spring in your footsteps or are you feeling a little jaded, a little worse for wear, a tad sad and neglected.

    Do you feel invisible. Does the face that stares back at you from the mirror seem like a stranger to you.

    Just who is that tired old lady looking back out at you.

    In short, have you become a Frump!!!

    Well fret ye not, salvation is at hand.

    Join our merry gang and make this the year you transform yourself.

    Ditch the Frump and become the Fabulous Woman you know you can be.

    And have some fun along the way.

    The Story So Far.......

    I have been looking back and I was astonished to discover that the First Frump to Fab thread began in 2011. Wow.

    Tempus Fugit and all that.

    Am I fabulous yet. Almost.

    How did it all begin.

    Well one day my son took a photo of me in an unguarded moment. I took one look and burst into tears. Who was that old hag, that strange woman who looked like a bag lady. That couldn't be me. So I ran upstairs and took a good hard look in a full length mirror.

    Yes, dear reader, it was me.

    I stopped snivelling and faced the truth. I was a mess. I resolved then and there to do something about it. I didn't know what that something was because at the time I was caring for my terminally ill husband and staring bankruptcy in the face.

    I was exhausted, I looked terrible and if I'm honest, I felt desperate. I didn't know what I was going to do, or where to begin so I started the first Frump to Fab thread as a diary to spur me on and keep me motivated.

    And the rest is history.

    My life is truly unrecognisable from that day. And I am not the same woman.

    I look better, feel better, my finances are better. I AM better.

    Not quite Goddess standard yet but getting there and working towards being fabulous and having a fabulous life.

    So......if you want to "Change Your Stars" then join our merry gang.

    Let's make 2019 the best one yet.

    And......more Importantly, let's have some fun along the way.

    One Golden Rule Please.

    Be kind to one another.

    Please do not be harsh or judgemental to others. None of us is perfect. It doesn't matter how we became Frumps what matters is how we are going to reclaim our looks, our energy, our joire de vie.

    The past is the past and why we became Frumps is no longer relevant. It doesn't matter how we got here, what matters is how we move forward.

    We are all here because we want to make things better. We want to look attractive, some of us might want to improve our health and fitness. All of us on here aspire to being the best we can be. So let's support each other.

    For the Newbies, the Lurkers and as a refresher course for our regular members ......

    I have posted the new thread earlier this year to give us some time to reflect and decide exactly what we want to achieve next year. Time to set goals, time for some strategic planning.

    Over the next few days, in true MSE fashion, myself and our regulars will be talking about some simple easy and FREE steps you can make as you prepare to start as your journey to Fabdom.

    So Welcome Everyone.

    Let's get this show on the road.....

    Let's Rock!!!!

    This Forum tip was included in MoneySavingExpert.com's weekly email!
    If you haven’t already, join the forum to reply.
    Last edited by MSE Tine; 03-04-2019 at 12:33 PM.
Page 128
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 7th Nov 19, 3:18 PM
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    lessonlearned
    The thing about FIRE.....is you don't HaVE to retire early, you can just aim for FI. I think that is a goal well worth working towards.

    If you are financially independent, or even just not in debt and with a a financial cushion then you have more choice. You can switch jobs, change careers, reduce your hours, start your Own business.

    And you're right....it all starts with managing our finances well, just being a bit more savvy. I often read yours and SUgarbabys spending diaries. Absolutely fascinating and both of you have amazing bargain hunting skills.

    Life can still throw curved balls of course, none of us know what lies round the corner. My husband and I had reached a point of comfortable affluence, and were well on track to early retirement but fate had other ideas. Hey ho. That's all in the past.

    I have learned a lot about money management since then, as have my boys.

    I think there's a lot more information now, hopefully the younger generations will access this knowledge and run with it.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 07-11-2019 at 3:20 PM.
    • maman
    • By maman 7th Nov 19, 4:14 PM
    • 20,895 Posts
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    maman
    Welcome jules
    I've been with the thread ever since LL started it and I feel so much better for it. You can't hope to tackle everything at once but what matters is that you do something, anything and use that achievement to spur you to the next step.

    Joining the thread is a good first step.

    Sounds like you've had a rough time of it lately but you can move forward and you're right that asking for help is the right way to go. You seem to have a good network of friends and family plus professionals so take advantage of whatever you can. I don't know if you're a list person but sometimes writing things down can help or even just posting on here. Try to achieve something every day and build on it. It could be as simple as a walk round the block or to the post box or to buy some milk. Getting out is good.

    Well done on finishing the hard work in the dining room LL . Although woodwork is more fiddly it's less back breaking.

    I'm unfamiliar with FIRE but I'm all for being savvy with money. I think one of the most important things is to recognise the difference between wants and needs.

    I don't know of any actual offers on the Clarins beauty flash balm as I've managed to get mine 'free'. Every Mothers Day and Christmas there are gift sets available which are really good value. The gift sets cost the same as the serum and the beauty flash balm and a lip gloss come with it. I think there's also an extra points offer on at Boots this weekend too so that's the best value I'm aware of.

    We've booked flights to go to Amsterdam for a few days at the end of the month so that's something to look forward to.

    We're out for dinner tonight. I still don't think I'm ready for a jumper so may wear my wrap dress with a long sleeved top and leggings underneath and make up.
    • Wednesday2000
    • By Wednesday2000 7th Nov 19, 4:33 PM
    • 3,587 Posts
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    Wednesday2000
    I started seriously reading about FIRE when my husband was ill with cancer. Luckily, thanks to this forum I decided to start overpaying our mortgage years ago and we were able to pay off our mortgage 10 years early.

    I thought that if my husband had to lose his job due to cancer we could always move out of London and downsize to a flat, or even move to a much cheaper area and probably not have to downsize at all.

    He has a very good pension from his job so he wants to be retired in about 5 years time, when he is 53 and I will be in my late forties.

    We really need to get back on it though as we have been spending so much in the past year!

    All I NEED to not obsess. I dont want to trigger anyone so I wont put numbers but been eating xxx cal and end up binging on xxxxx cal then purging. It's got to stop. I am going to order a book called overcome binge eating what the therapist reccomend-actual you know I might go in the city with mum mum. Something I haven't done for ages-I get v panicky and get it from waterstones ( was a 4 cheaper than Amazon with delivery) mum would like a coffee too. Plus would be a few steps.
    Originally posted by jules81
    I have heard of that book, it's meant to be good.xxx


    We've booked flights to go to Amsterdam for a few days at the end of the month so that's something to look forward to.
    Originally posted by maman
    Oh, fun!
    Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for you.
    • jules81
    • By jules81 7th Nov 19, 10:19 PM
    • 73 Posts
    • 324 Thanks
    jules81
    Reading through all your posts I've got a lot to learn. A lot

    1685 cals today. So a healthy amount. Feels good to not restrict or binge

    Xxx
    • maman
    • By maman 8th Nov 19, 5:03 PM
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    • 123,874 Thanks
    maman
    Reading through all your posts I've got a lot to learn. A lot
    Originally posted by jules81
    But we didn't learn it all at once. I find it best to start one thing at a time and then when it's a habit, start something else as well then gradually build up a routine. I'm not saying I never slip (note to self, I haven't put foot cream on for a few days) but I have the basics that I do every singe day like my serum, moisturiser and eye cream and cleaning my teeth (like the hygienist taught me) and then other things that come with a pamper session. Clothes take longer but a cull of the wardrobe is always a good starting point.

    1685 cals today. So a healthy amount. Feels good to not restrict or binge

    Xxx
    Originally posted by jules81
    Well done.

    I don't know if anyone saw the Lose a stone for Christmas programme. I watched it on catch up.
    https://www.channel5.com/show/lose-a-stone-for-christmas-and-fit-into-your-party-frock/

    It was mostly (GP monitored) crash diets to kick start weightloss but there was one young woman who mainly cut out added sugars and cooked from scratch. I think that was the most sustainable but the rubbish they ate beforehand was unbelievable. When did people start eating so many take aways?

    I'm not sure if they deliberately made Ruth Langford look frumpy but I thought she did. It was possibly so she could empathise with the others but she had the drabbest of beige blouses on and very mumsy looking jeans that weren't flattering at all.

    We had a good evening out for dinner with friends last night. In the end I wore my Zara maxi dress with the black layers underneath and felt good. I was tempted to wear my long, black suede boots but decided it wasn't yet cold enough.

    I've been very lazy with shoes in the past few months more so since sandal weather stopped. All I seem to wear are my fake Skechers and occasionally black suede ballet pumps if I'm dressing up a bit.

    Part of the problem was that the podiatrist advised me to wear orthotic insoles and I'm very limited to which shoes they will fit but while I'll wear them if I'm walking a lot I must try and wear others for 'car to bar' type occasions. I have several pairs of boots so I need to try them on again.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 8th Nov 19, 5:58 PM
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    lessonlearned
    I have dug my knee length boots out today .....first time since last winter. Winter is definitely on its way, Very cold here. I'm getting my new windows fitted on 21st November, looking forward to it. House should be much cosier.

    Have a bit of dilemma. Car playing up and the garage can't look at it till 19th. I am going to conduct an experiment, see how I do without it for 11 days. Then see if it's worth shelling out more money to get it fixed again or whether I should just sell it.

    I only do around 2k miles a year so tbh I don't really "need" a car, there are good transport links, I have a free bus pass and the occasional taxis wont break the bank. I now really loathe driving. I was never a keen motorist anyway, it has always been a chore but just lately my dislike of driving has got worse, I find it quite stressful at times. So for 2 pins I'd cheerfully never get behind the wheel again.

    I won't make a decision just yet. I'll see how it goes.

    Had a lovely afternoon with a friend, she made me a coconut cake, she's a fab baker.

    Acupuncture this morning. Knee feeling much better these days.

    I did start to watch that programme but because it seemed to be mainly about crash diets I didnt watch it all. I though Ruth looked a bit beige and bland....most unlike her.as you say maybe it was deliberate so as not to initimidate the other ladies.

    I agree about takeaways......and how many people seem to eat out so regularly......not nice restaurants but fast food eateries. Our city and our surburbs are rammed with them. They do a roaring trade.

    And I know this sounds outrageously snobby but oh dear I can still never get over how many people roam the streets stuffing their faces with junk food.......

    I had it drilled into me that it was "common" to eat in the street, by both my parents and my school. Woe betide you if a prefect caught you.

    Joan Collins once made a remake about how it was always fat people who ate in the street. Maybe she had a point, maybe there is a link between mindlessly grazing and being overweight.

    One of the best dietary pieces of advice seems to be to actually sit down properly and pay attention to what you are eating because it helps you register that you have eaten iyswim.

    I know if I eat on the go I never really feel satisfied and then I will pick and nibble because I still feel hungry.
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 08-11-2019 at 6:00 PM.
    • maman
    • By maman 8th Nov 19, 6:32 PM
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    maman
    Good to hear from you LL . I've just been listening to the news about floods coming to your neck of the woods and hope it's just your poor shrubs that suffer.

    We've definitely cut down on car use. When I gave up working full time we decided to see whether we still needed two cars. As they were parked behind each other in the drive, we noticed that we just took the one at the back and my car was used about 3 times in 6 months. So we got rid of one and resolved that if one of us was daft enough to get another full-time job then we could easily buy another.

    This hasn't happened. We use public transport around the city and easily share the car when we need to go further afield. We couldn't manage without though as we have friends all over the county (particularly me as I didn't work locally) and often meet up in pubs and restaurants in villages which would be difficult to do without a car.

    Because we live close to the University we have a choice of just about every takeaway known to man in our area. We have a Chinese about twice a year and I haven't even had fish and chips for ages. I love chips but I make my own. What mostly puts me off is that I know I won't stay slim eating junk but I can't believe how much money is wasted too. I don't particularly like pizza but I know they're far better value in the supermarket than from Domino's or wherever.

    I read about a new Helen Mirren film called (I think) The Good Liar about an Internet dating con man. It looks interesting. Have you seen it sugarbaby ?
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 8th Nov 19, 8:25 PM
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    • 84,930 Thanks
    lessonlearned
    I watched the local news earlier, it's pretty bad further north of the county. Apparently a months worth of rain in a day. And of course the rain has to go somewhere. So far the River Derwent is ok but the ground is saturated. And the local farmers can't plant anything, so it's not just me and my spring bulbs.

    Touch wood, since the course of river was altered we haven't had major flooding for decades now but the city was often regularly flooded. I can remember serious flooding in the 60s and early 70s.

    My eldest son lives in the city centre, near the river and there is currently a major programme under way to further strengthen flood defences. Not sure how far advanced the work is, its a major project. Sometimes, on our walks, I take my grandson to watch "the diggers" (Excavators). Like most little boys he loves them.

    Hopefully both my sons house and the rest of city centre should be ok. There is some low lying land dotted round the outskirts, especially to the west (where the river flows in) but there are several designated flood plains which have never been built on or farmed, just used for summer grazing. They are often under water in the winter but so far they do seem to have been successful at containing excess water.

    When I was house hunting I was tempted by a sweet little cottage in one of the villages on the south side......until I checked with the environment agency....... It is a gorgeous village but it sits at the confluence of three rivers that area is notorious for flooding. I passed on that one.

    Apparently it's been a particularly wet autumn. Not sure if it can be attributed to global warming - it's still too early to say really. One wet autumn isn't really enough to establish a true picture. It could be nature just rebalancing because for the last couple of years we havent had enough rain and the reservoirs were seriously depleted. I went to Carsington Water in August and I had never seen the water levels so low. I didn't go but apparently Lady Bower was the same.

    Apparently we get a respite over the weekend but more rain on the way next week. So who knows ......

    I'm looking forward to "The Good Liar". I also fancy "The Aeronaut".

    Just checked the website......they have closed the floodgates and shut off some roads.......
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 08-11-2019 at 8:32 PM.
    • chanie
    • By chanie 8th Nov 19, 9:39 PM
    • 2,393 Posts
    • 13,193 Thanks
    chanie
    I hope everyone is safe if there is flooding.

    We are a two car family. We could probably just about cope with 1 car, but our lives are stressful enough as it is and having two cars takes a lot of pressure off. When the children no longer need taxiing around as much, I’d definitely consider going down to one car.

    Using some of my birthday money, I bought a new purse from eBay, which arrived today (saving 60). It’s smaller than my current purse, but I have culled a lot of unused storecards and downloaded others to apps. My handbag feels so much lighter and more spacious.
    2019 savings on purchases 4239.29
    My spending diary - Spend Less, Live More - a spending diary
    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5576179
    • Wednesday2000
    • By Wednesday2000 8th Nov 19, 9:41 PM
    • 3,587 Posts
    • 25,484 Thanks
    Wednesday2000
    But we didn't learn it all at once. I find it best to start one thing at a time and then when it's a habit, start something else as well then gradually build up a routine.
    Originally posted by maman
    I totally agree with Maman .

    I am a tomboy at heart so I have had to take the advice of the gorgeous women on here.

    I tried redoing my wardrobe, trying to shape up and lose some weight and then doing things likes pampering. Bubble baths, body lotions, feet cream etc... All nice things as we all deserve this for ourselves.xxx
    Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for you.
    • Wednesday2000
    • By Wednesday2000 8th Nov 19, 9:46 PM
    • 3,587 Posts
    • 25,484 Thanks
    Wednesday2000
    I hope everyone is safe if there is flooding.
    Originally posted by chanie
    Oh yes, of course.
    Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for you.
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 8th Nov 19, 10:26 PM
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    • 84,930 Thanks
    lessonlearned
    Just spoken to son and DIl. Took her 4 hours to get home. They have no power and there is some flooding nearby but at a safe distance from them.. The new flood defence system near their house is doing its job. The river is high but it reached its zenith at 6pm and the water levels are now dropping.

    They are staying put tonight, they are in the orange zone not the red zone so should be ok now that the river level is falling. They are not on the front line. If power is not back on by morning they will come here.

    One of the parks to the west of the city is badly flooded where the river has burst its banks. But so far the city centre isn't too badly affected, just a couple of areas. Several roads are closed, some from flooding but mostly to allow access for emergency services.

    Hope everyone is ok.

    Lord knows what joys next week will bring when we get the next belt of rain.
    • sugarbaby125
    • By sugarbaby125 9th Nov 19, 11:56 AM
    • 1,853 Posts
    • 12,907 Thanks
    sugarbaby125
    Hello Ladies,

    On Thursday 7th November I went to see the film The Areonauts at Streatham Odeon using my Odeon Limitless card. I also got a free bar of Areo at the cinema. I really enjoyed this film and I would give this film 9/10

    Yesterday, I spent the whole day with my eldest daughter and her husband in Andover. It was great to catch up with the both of them and have a laugh and watch films with my daughter.

    I have a terrible stomach ache today, so I will most probably have to cancel my plans for today but I will wait until later this evening to decide.

    Maman
    I have not yet seen The Good Liar but it is on my list of films to watch this week
    • maman
    • By maman 9th Nov 19, 7:11 PM
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    • 123,874 Thanks
    maman
    Hope you feel better soon sugarbaby . It's a small world with you having family in Andover. I know it so well. My DD2 lives there too and loads of DH's family. We lived there for a few years and I worked there for 26!

    Hope your family are OK LL . I posted to tell you that Debenhams have 15% off Clarins this weekend if you want to buy Beauty Flash Balm.

    I bought an animal print strappy nightie. Perfect for my sunshine holidays at 7.20!
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 11th Nov 19, 8:36 AM
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    • 84,930 Thanks
    lessonlearned
    ThAnks for that Maman. Although I didn't take up the offer this time. I went through my cosmetics and discovered I have several lots of tinted moisturiser that need using up first.

    Good morning lovely ladies.

    Derby floods have receded a bit but plenty more rain on the way both here and further up north so who knows. It was nice to see the sun yesterday and it was lovely and warm but back to the grey skies now.

    Busy week ahead, want to finish the final bits of painting and have a mega clean/tidy up. I have neglected the rest of the house a bit. Mind they are coming to fit the new windows next week so probably more mess and disruption.

    On the Fabbing front I need to book a hair cut, it's looking like rats tails again. also need to get back on with WW. I've put a couple of lbs on so need to nip that in the bud pronto.

    My friend took me out chazzer shopping, didn't see anything I fancied. I now have a pretty well stocked winter wardrobe so I am only going to buy something if it's truly fabulous darlings. .

    Tbh it's the same with food, toiletries, cleaning materials and pretty much everything else. I am pretty well stocked up with everything at the moment.

    I am going to use things up and save my pennies ......
    Last edited by lessonlearned; 11-11-2019 at 8:39 AM.
    • Wednesday2000
    • By Wednesday2000 11th Nov 19, 12:59 PM
    • 3,587 Posts
    • 25,484 Thanks
    Wednesday2000
    I have lost another pound with Intermittent Fasting so 4 pounds in two weeks.

    It doesn't feel like I'm even dieting as I'm eating what I like in the 10 hour window. I had a crisp sandwich for dinner last night and then had cookies and ice cream afterwards.

    We are staying in and watching a film today and maybe ordering a pizza later.

    I am going out tomorrow night for drinks and a meal. I'm going to wear one of my short navy dresses, my blue Autograph top with a navy jumper on top. I will maybe take my faux leather jacket if it is cold. I'm going to paint my nails red as well.

    I got The Ordinary order delivered but I'm not going to try it before I go out tomorrow just in case I get a reaction!
    Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for you.
    • maman
    • By maman 11th Nov 19, 4:22 PM
    • 20,895 Posts
    • 123,874 Thanks
    maman
    My hair's looking a bit of a mess too at the moment LL . I have an appointment booked for about 10 days time to coincide with a couple of events so I'm hanging on in there. It's mainly that my fringe is too long so looks straggly and generally limp. I think that's because I haven't had highlights for a while and that tends to make my hair coarser with more body.

    I was thinking the other day though that my mother and both my grandmothers had 'perms' at my age so I could look a lot worse.

    on the weightloss Wednesday.

    It's my art group this evening so I'm looking forward to that. It's Renoir tonight. To be honest I am feeling a bit tired and achey but getting fabbed up and pushing myself is good for me.

    It's been another good day here. DH and I went to the war memorial in the village his grandfather came from ( 2 brothers lost in WW1) and the drive through the autumn countryside was stunning.

    I notice there's an international theme for Christmas at Chatsworth this year LL. Will you be going?
    • chanie
    • By chanie 11th Nov 19, 8:14 PM
    • 2,393 Posts
    • 13,193 Thanks
    chanie
    fabbing faves

    Haven’t done one of these in a while..... my favourite fabbing products.

    Wet brush can be used on wet or dry hair. They have lots of different styles (I have the one for thick hair).
    https://www.boots.com/wet-brush
    I bought mine from TK Maxx for under 5.

    Clinique pop lip colour foundation range if you get colour matched for the foundation, they have 3 lipsticks which should compliment your skin based on the foundation. I didn’t bury the foundation, but bought a nude lipstick.
    https://www.clinique.co.uk/product/1605/68809/makeup/lipsticks/even-bettertm-pop-lip-colour-foundation

    The Ordinary skincare consistently gets good reviews. You will probably be confused when you view the range, but you can email them and they will recommend products for you. Products are cheap (5 for a product which last me 3+ months) and currently 23% off.
    https://deciem.com/category/skincare

    lush tea tree toner love this stuff, it’s made such a difference to my skin.
    https://uk.lush.com/products/spot-treatment/tea-tree-water
    2019 savings on purchases 4239.29
    My spending diary - Spend Less, Live More - a spending diary
    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5576179
    • candygirl
    • By candygirl 11th Nov 19, 10:25 PM
    • 27,729 Posts
    • 117,996 Thanks
    candygirl
    Well done on the weight loss again WEDNESDAY, you'll be disappearing on us soon
    I've 10 days left to get my hair cut n coloured, n eyebrows done.I can do my own nails, so that's less expense thank God
    Have just ordered a few bits of clothes from the Shein website.They have lots if quirky stuff , so suits me fine
    Firegate continues! I'm picking the part up tomoz, n cos the original guy's I'll, I have had to get a new one to fit it on Wed!! Pray it works please girls, then I can start packing
    "You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf"

    (Kabat-Zinn 2004)
    • lessonlearned
    • By lessonlearned 12th Nov 19, 8:13 AM
    • 12,121 Posts
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    lessonlearned
    Fingers crossed for you Candy.

    Good morning lovely ladies.....

    Brrrr it's cold and blowing a gale, and more rain forecast. Fun.!!! Good job the handyman came and staked up the trees (saplings) yesterday. Very timely.

    I'm going nowhere today. . Going to get stuff done,

    Yesterday I finished painting the curtain pole (was dark wood - so 80s darlings - but now a nice pale grey to blend in). Must have saved myself around 40. Need to claw back on the budget wherever I can, especially as I am now buying in more help.

    Also spent some time yesterday sorting and reorganising my wardrobes, toiletries and meds. Today it's more of the same and make a start on the paperwork.

    Just popped myself on the scales.....need to get a grip and shift that last few pounds but at least the blood sugars are still down.

    Well done on the weight loss Wednesday.
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