Old style as an escape from the world?

No is my favourite word.. noone ever expects anything of me, people stop asking after a while and if I can be bothered to do something it is a bonus and much appreciated.. I have the will, what I do not have is the time or the money. I'm a giver of toiletries to the school fairs/tombolas/various other waste of time activities.

When I bring home something new.. for example a new pair of curtains... I fill the packaging with stuff to leave so in my head I have useless stuff leaving and useful stuff coming in, in the same volume. if I get a huge bag with a tiny thing in it.. I fill the huge bag.. that is always very gratifying.

Freecycle is your friend.. use it.. to get rid, not gather more.. there is always someone else who will love that stuff as much as you do and have somewhere nice to display it rather than it being hidden away in your drawer of doom.

Banish sentimental attachment.. memories are in you head not in a piece of 'art' your child made at nursery 47 years ago.. or in a hideous ornament or anything else.. these things mean nothing to anyone else.

if you have not worn or used it in 12 months get rid.. (6 months for everyday stuff.. but you might not wear some items often.. but after a year they are probably totally out of date anyway)

I store my tins upside down.. the contents slop out so much more easily when the juice is at the top.. no more scratting around for that last spaghetti hoop or bean!

practice doing nothing.. just sitting.. I absolutely cannot do this.. I get irritable and fidgetty and itchy.. but sit, do nothing and relax and shrug off the day..

I am currently flinging out so much stuff it is beyond incredible.. I will have some level of order in this hovel.. I cannot stand cooking, housework or gardening.. and I refuse to do anything after the children are in bed.. 7:30pm cut off for anything remotely houseworky. That has been helpful.. it gives time to wind down before bed.

Pigpen storing tins upside down, why have I never thought of this genius idea!

I think a key point is to distinguish between "clutter" and "your actual stuff". Clutter to me is temporary, menial, domestic tedium; paperwork, washing & mending piles, presents waiting to be wrapped etc. This stuff shouldn't be in sight, depressing you. It's necessary, but it can be stored in one designated cupboard/drawer where you can retrieve it and deal with it one item at a time.

I personally don't mind doing housework as it's my main chance of listening to music (can't be bothered upgrading to a digital portable device), so I turn a chore into something with a positive side.

One thing I have learned is having a job you hate AND coming home to somewhere you don't feel relaxed and comfortable is a terrible, toxic combination. Seriously reconsider the role/employer if it's making you exhausted and miserable.

lessonlearned wrote: »

GQ. Loving the skivers charter.....I think I need to print it out and get it framed......:rotfl:

Enjoy, enjoy.

Life is short, and the really great thing about not being a kid any more is that you can eat your dessert before/ instead of your main course and NO ONE CAN STOP YOU, mwah ha ha!

I regard life as a constant quest to cut out as much of the boring (boring to me - all things are subjective) bits to have the maximum amount of time to spend on what interests/ amuses/ entertains me.

It's amazing how you can cut corners in ways which many people will not even notice, and free up countless hours of bliss to do your own thing. Sometimes, you might wanna keep schtumn about some of these timesavers, as people can get a bit supercilious. Or downright jealous if they see someone else bunking off to play in the park when they could be doing something worthy like licking their skirting boards clean/ cutting the lawn with nail scissors/ fretting about cooking the latest recipe incorporating pan-fried chia seeds and houmous cous-cous enchilada lah-de-das.

I once presented a friend with a homemade birthday cake. Well, it was homemade by one of the church bazaar ladies and collided with some water icing and sprinkles whilst briefly in my custody. I think he might have accidentally been left with the impression it was all the work of my own fair hands.............:rotfl:

The Skiver's Charter continued.......

9. You can kondo if you like, but I ain't rolling knicks, I just chuck 'em in a basket. Ditto socks. Which are paired in balls, even if that makes them stressed and unhappy, according to MK. Rather them suffer that fate than me, which is what would happen if I couldn't find their mate.

10. If you can't pronounce it without effort, you've no business eating it. We're British - embrace the pies, you know it makes sense.

11. If it can't go in a washing machine at 40 c and drip dry, why are you even considering owning it?

12. Bed-making has been scientifically proven to be unhygenic. The covers should be thrown back at all times to allow the air to freshen the bed. OK, so it looks untidy, so shut the bedroom door. Only ladies of negotiable affection and 18th century french aristocrats need to receive guests in their bedrooms.

13. You could embrace a raw food diet and pretend to be a fashionable, health-conscious type. No one needs to hear your inner voice going; Yippee!! No saucepans to wash up, or stovetops or ovens to clean EVER AGAIN- I'm winning!

14. No household should have more than one mug, glass, plate, bowl or set of eating irons per permanant resident in circulation at any one time. Keep spares or guest items under lock and key. If your spouses or sprogs cannot eat because they've left their crocks under their beds growing penicillin, that's their problem not yours. I know a woman who did this and it worked really well.

15. You can cheat on your homework by not reading your book group book choice. Blag it and lie like an old rug. Or divorce your book group, I've consciously uncoupled from mine and feel great.

16. If someone is trying to manipulate you into doing something you don't want to do, smile sweetly and declare; I'd rather have a root canal filling than do XXXXX. They'll get the picture, trust me.

GC thank you, you've just made me spray my keyboard with wine belly laughing :rotfl::rotfl:(and as my top is going the wash tonight I've used the sleeve to wipe it.....)

My add to your list would be "if your dust is distressing you, take your specs off";)