Trapped and can’t move on!

Marko2315 · 11 October 2018 at 2:51PM

Hi, my partner and I are really in need of some help and advice. I’ll try and keep a long story brief.

Both my partner and I have previously been married and at the time of writing are still legally married but instigating divorce proceeding with our respective ex partners.

I have sold my marital home and my ex wife and I walked away with a small amount of equity but essentially both able to move on without any ties other than the two children we have together.

My partners situation is more complicated in that the house she lives in is owned by family and paid for outright without any mortgage. She does not pay rent. Her ex husband is living in the original marital home with his new partner with the property on an interest only mortgage that both he and my partners name is on.

The issues have arisen in that we want to buy our own house together but can’t do so whilst her name is on the other mortgage. The house is in negative equity and the lender TSB will not allow her ex husband to take sole responsibility without a re mortgage. This apparently means clearing the negative equity and him generating a 10% deposit. We have offered to pay half the negative equity but still he is dragging his feet and being awkward, stating that the house has now been valued for less and he hasn’t got the money.

What can we do?? We can’t give him more money and don’t know where to turn. Until my partners name is off the mortgage we can’t move on with our lives and get our own house fit for our personal circumstances and family size. All I can think of is that my partner tells him that the house must go up for sale and that they split any negative equity. What’s people’s thoughts? Obviously we run the risk of him sabotaging any potential sale as he is quite happy with the current arrangement. This is a massive concern. Thanks in anticipation.

Caz3121 · 11 October 2018 at 4:01PM

how are they dealing with the financials for the divorce? I would have thought her solicitor would be best to advise what options there may be

silvercar · 11 October 2018 at 5:49PM

Why can't you move into your partner's current home?

If your partner's ex can't afford to pay half the negative equity and generate a 10% deposit, you can't force him.

If he can't find half the negative equity (and any selling costs that you and your partner can't or won't find) then you all may not be able to sell.

Thrugelmir · 11 October 2018 at 6:47PM

You'll have to settle the negative equity in full in order to move forward. Or wait till the property increases in value.

Is your partner contributing to half the mortgage?

Marko2315 · 12 October 2018 at 7:15PM

The house is too small and between us we have 3 children. So am I right I’m thinking he has us over a barrel and calls all the shots because he won’t stump up his half of the negative? Does anybody know anything about orders to sell? Surely this would apply in these circumstances or proceeding with the divorce on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour. Is my partner expected to remain on this mortgage for the rest of her days? Thanks

Marko2315 · 12 October 2018 at 7:17PM

Oh and no she isn’t but is allowing his partner to live there free of charge when I guess technically she could ask she pay rent! I apologise if I seem to the point but I don’t see any reason why she should pay towards a house that she is getting no benefit from that he is living in with his new girlfriend. Anybody disagree? Thanks for the reply’s

Marko2315 · 12 October 2018 at 7:19PM

Legally there must be something we can do to force a sale of the house if he won’t remove her name.

AnotherJoe · 13 October 2018 at 12:34AM

Marko2315 wrote: »

Legally there must be something we can do to force a sale of the house if he won’t remove her name.

Yes there is. See a solicitor, go to court, get a court order to force the sale. Someone will have to pay for that, I've seen costs of c £10k bandied around here. If the ex is seen as being obstructive it will be him. If the solicitor agrees you are in a good position to force the sale then perhaps ex to be will decide he'd rather not pay an extra £10k on top of other costs and will give in, eg maybe as often happens in these type of circumstances he will mysteriously find the money to clear the NE.

Marko2315 · 15 October 2018 at 9:46AM

Thank you very much for your reply. That makes sense and if I was in his position I’d definifitely find the deposit to make a remortgage work and spend the money staying in the home I wanted to be in, rather than spend thousands on legal fees only to have to sell the house and find thousands more setting up a new home. Either way it is going to cost us all money. Thanks again

TrickyDicky101 · 15 October 2018 at 10:39AM

The problem with going to court is that any up front costs incurred will need to be paid for - do you have £10k sat around that you can blow on doing that? Whether or not - ultimately - your partner's ex is made to foot the bill is irrelevant if he doesn't have the money to pay. You will still need to have paid it up front.

AnotherJoe · 15 October 2018 at 10:53AM

TrickyDicky101 wrote: »

The problem with going to court is that any up front costs incurred will need to be paid for - do you have £10k sat around that you can blow on doing that? Whether or not - ultimately - your partner's ex is made to foot the bill is irrelevant if he doesn't have the money to pay. You will still need to have paid it up front.

I dont think the upfront costs are £10k. I think if thats if you go the whole hog. The threat of it and a smaller sum spent stating the process may make ex move into gear.

Of course, if ex wont play ball then yes they will need the whole sum.Need to speak to their solicitor. Sounds like spending that would be worthwhile compared to sticking with the status quo for how long? 10 years? 20 years?

Trapped and can’t move on!

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