What did you put behind the bar?

shoebox13 · 6 February 2019 at 6:36PM

Recently engaged here and thinking of doing a pub wedding - we're based in London and will be organising and paying for everything ourselves, so laid-back and convenient is key! Probably a small registry office ceremony and meal with a handful of very close friends and family, then an evening party for 100+ people with just casual buffet/bar food.

I realise that this will vary wildly depending on where and when you got married (and how boozy your friends are), but was hoping to get some ballpark figures from people who put money behind the bar on their wedding (or even picked up the whole tab). Thinking about it, doesn't even need to be a wedding - any pub/bar party where you paid for some drinks! How far did £XX get you? Or, how much did XX number of guests drink?

If most of our guests are evening-only (i.e. aren't getting the sit-down meal and half a bottle of wine thing) then we definitely want to subsidise their drinks in some way, but just trying to get an idea of how that could look.

(Any venue suggestions very welcome too!)

Thanks!

Tom99 · 6 February 2019 at 7:07PM

Could you leave you card behind the bar for say the 1st hour, enable everyone to get a drink with not too much abuse of your hospitality. You can then check the spend and decide at what point enough is enough.

Faith177 · 6 February 2019 at 7:39PM

Nothing at all we paid for the wine with dinner and a glass of fizz after the ceremony anything else people paid their way. I was already spending £70 a head on dinner wasn’t going to fork out more for people to get drunk on my money.

I’ve worked bars at weddings and 90% of the time people take the p when their not paying for it doubles of premium spirits, most expensive pints or wine second they have to pay they go on to the cheap stuff

maisie_cat · 6 February 2019 at 7:49PM

We put £400 behind the bar for 40 adults/10 kids. We had to top it up £100 because some of the kids got hungry and needed bar snacks. Funnily enough there was nothing left at the end but everybody had a great time. We had already paid £100 a head for the meal etc but we didn't want anybody to feel uncomfortable about being able to afford drinks. It did get abused though, my nephew and brother playing drinking games!

Snozzle · 6 February 2019 at 7:57PM

Hi - my husband and I have hosted 6 'events' - our wedding, 3 baptism events, a ruby and golden wedding anniversary - all were sit-down meals with drinks / tea / coffee and then evening reception. In all of them we ran an open bar i.e. we paid the final bill - for us it's the food that costs the most - the drinks bill in the big picture of things was never as huge as we expected - there was always someone driving in each group so on soft drinks as well.

I can't comment on London prices but our wedding venue gave us a package option in advance which we took and in fact gave us money back much to our surprise. They had explained that with the package you knew what you were paying and at some weddings they drink through the roof and get their money's worth while at others not quite as much is drunk but it balances out for everyone. Perhaps the bar would also do a deal? Have a great time!

Fuzzy_Duck · 13 February 2019 at 2:39PM

We had about 50 guests at our wedding and put £500 behind the bar which lasted for the evening reception. There was also a half pint of beer for everyone as a welcome drink (the venue was a brewery) and some bottles of wine on the tables. I can't remember how much wine we provided, but there are guides online that tell you how many bottles will ensure everyone gets a glass. That said we had way too much wine and were giving bottles away to guests at the end- whilst I have quite boozy friends, not many of them were wine drinkers and I don't think anyone with sense wants to risk drinking too much at a wedding!

Elise1912 · 16 February 2019 at 2:07PM

We weren't going to put any £ behind the bar. We paid for welcome drinks (champagne), wine during the meal plus champagne for toasts so didn't think it was necessary. But my MIL did put £500 behind the bar I think just as something she thought was needed!

Shelbi · 5 March 2019 at 3:05PM

Hi Shoebox,

Congratulations on your engagement! I thought i'd delurke to put in my two pence worth:o

I'm also from London and will be marrying here in the Autumn, trying to go for laid back, hassle-free with a register office and pub reception. We opted for Stoke Newington Register office and a little pub for hire around the corner called The Londesborough. Wedding hasn't happened yet we're still planning but happy to share what we've opted for so far. We've opted for prosecco toast, a sit down meal (£50ph) with wine (will order 50 bottles- £17each) and will also be putting cash behind the bar for the evening reception.

Opting to serve wine, spirits and mixers, beer and cider only- cost approx. £5 each (so I was told by venue as rough guide) so we'll put around £3k behind the bar. We are having around 75 guests so that'll work out about 8 drinks each. Well assess whether to add more if it runs out. I'm hoping that will be more than plenty. Would really love to hear how much others have put behind the bar to get an idea if actually works out too much or too little my Finance is of the opinion when its done its done. :rotfl: Personally I'd be surprised if anyone can still stand after all that booze so I'm hoping it will suffice.

Hope that helps, good luck with your planning

Shelbi x

heartbreak_star · 6 March 2019 at 1:46PM

I don't think I've ever been to a wedding that had an open bar...always just had a toast drink provided then cash bar. Nobody ever seems to mind!

HBS x

WibblyGirly · 9 March 2019 at 2:41PM

We plan to do it a bit differently and not put money behind the bar but actually provide the alcohol ourselves are there won't be a bar. (think garden type wedding). I'm going to put aside approx £500 for 60 guests for this and try to buy when its on offer in the supermarkets. I'd also like it to a late afternoon wedding so less drinking time.

With our invites I'm going to ask what everyones favourite spirit/wine etc is so I can be sure to get the right spread. No point buying 30 bottles of red when only 4 people like it.

Greta_Sharbo · 11 March 2019 at 1:18PM

We did plan around £500 - but have since heard FIL and BIL plan on doing same each too so might be up to £1500 there. Relatively small wedding - should cover 4/5 drinks each and after that they can buy their own!

What did you put behind the bar?

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