The Edcawber Principle

edinburgher · 3 May 2018 at 9:26PM

Lovely people - any tips on re-training a littlely?

DD has taken to coming through to our bed *every night* :eek:

She isn't upset, maybe a little confused (as is to be expected at 02:00-04:00). Taking her back through multiple times (say 3-5) and eventually we give up as we have work in the morning.

Any thoughts? We talk to her about it and she mostly says that she likes sleeping in Mummy and Daddy bed and that her bed isn't comfortable, which I don't believe...

Eager_Elephant · 4 May 2018 at 6:56AM

My DD (now 15) did exactly the same, I would take her back through numerous times until one day she realised that if she climbed in to the bed from the bottom rather than the side we didn't actually feel her or hear her but would wake in the morning with her in our bed.

I spoke to the health visitor and of course they say the same about taking them back to their own bed but if you don't know she is in your bed how do you do that??

After a few months she just stopped coming in to our bed like she had never started. There was no rhyme nor reason.

Sorry, no actual advice apart from to do what is best for your family and remember it is hardly likely she will still be in with you when she is a teenager!!!!

greent · 4 May 2018 at 10:33AM

Having had 4 do this for varying amounts of time and at differing ages, I'm all for the 'let 'em sleep in my bed' if it means we get some sleep. I found it got worse if we made an issue out of it (DS3's reason was that he didn't like waking alone and that he wanted to share a bed with someone - and as mummy and daddy shared a bed, he thought that was reasonable - hard to argue with that!) They do grow out of it. Although totally get that's not the 'recommended' thing to do....

choccielover · 4 May 2018 at 11:38PM

No advice from here.

Ours is a serial ninja sleeper and finds her way into our bed most nights.

She doesn’t do it anywhere else she sleeps (though she rarely sleeps out to be fair) but either clambers over DH and bullies him into the position she feels most comfortable (laid using his arm as a pillow) or clambers up from the foot of the bed so we don’t notice

She is a settled sleeper so doesn’t roll, kick, toss and turn so doesn’t unsettle us at all so we mostly let her be.

I get it’s not recommended (though I don’t normally follow advice as such and would rather find my own path) but on balance, it isn’t going to be too long till she won’t come anywhere near us because we are embarrassing parents and she’s a snotty teenager so I’m taking all the snuggles I can get right now.

If she was an unsettled sleeper though, I’d have to do something about it I think...

Sorry, not much help there I suspect

try_harder · 5 May 2018 at 8:20AM

All five of our children slept in bed with us though the years ,we would frequently have three in our bed ,we would all sleep well every night and it worked perfectly for us , i loved every minute of those days i have to say

edinburgher · 5 May 2018 at 4:06PM

18-24 hours of gardening
2 wheelie bins and 20 bin bags of thatch
11 items purchased
2 items returned
2 nasty burns and
1 minor construction project

Later and I have sown and fertilised our new and improved lawn. I get the appeal of plastic now :rotfl:

It had better look nice! The horrifying thing? That wasn't even all the moss, just maybe 70-80% of it :eek: Had to sow now as we're off on holiday next week.

Suffolk_lass · 5 May 2018 at 4:55PM

You could use some of the thatch to line a hanging basket? put some hardy green things in with a single brightly coloured plant?

edinburgher · 5 May 2018 at 5:34PM

Suffolk_lass wrote: »

You could use some of the thatch to line a hanging basket? put some hardy green things in with a single brightly coloured plant?

I'm not a fan of hanging baskets SL - very windy in our neck of the woods so they tend not to last long! I can recycle about 2 bags worth a week through our brown bin, so they'll be gone by the end of the summer. I read somewhere it wasn't "etiquette" to put thatch in the brown bin, but sod whoever that was, Council Tax exists!

Have installed DD's new car seat (they grow so fast) and have agreed to help babysit one of her wee pals for 5 hours tomorrow. I have to admit to being a bit mercenary - helping out one of our geographically closest friends so that they can have an afternoon off in the pub - let's hope they return the favour some day

beanielou · 5 May 2018 at 6:47PM

You have been a busy bee.
Well done

Karmacat · 6 May 2018 at 11:10AM

Soundinggood, Ed - and swapping babysitting duties (hopefully!) sounds like the most sensible thing on earth

I'm feeling your pain about the lawn and the moss - I've finally given up paying attention to the hedges, the grass and the borders have *got* to be seen to

The Edcawber Principle

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