Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

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  • Torry_Quine
    Torry_Quine Posts: 18,827
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    calleyw wrote: »
    Thanks Torry,


    How goes your day?


    Well the icing on the cake today. Remember the on off thing I had with someone who called me mental and treated badly. Guess what after just over two year of no contact, he has texted me.


    It has really upset me. But after talking to a couple of people. We think he is fishing and might have got dumped and thinks he can come running back to me!!!!


    Yeah in his dreams. He wont be getting a reply


    Yours


    Calley x

    You're right not to respond to him.

    I washed a load overnight and put it out to dry today. It's still strange only having my clothes. I changed my bedding, its not easy on my own but it feels like an achievement and will be nice to have a fresh bed.

    Still exhausted.
    Lost my soulmate so life is empty.

    I can bear pain myself, he said softly, but I couldna bear yours. That would take more strength than I have -
    Diana Gabaldon, Outlander
  • calleyw
    calleyw Posts: 9,822
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    You're right not to respond to him.

    I washed a load overnight and put it out to dry today. It's still strange only having my clothes. I changed my bedding, its not easy on my own but it feels like an achievement and will be nice to have a fresh bed.

    Still exhausted.


    Torry,


    You are indeed correct, I wont be contacting him in anyway. But its nagging at me. And making me worry about what his next move is. I know over thinking stuff.



    Can I ask a question. Do you have routine? get up, go to bed etc at the same time?


    This may sound strange but would a journal of your thoughts and feelings everyday help. it gets it out of your head and on the page.


    It also may help you to see how far you have come. Even when you feel that you have made no progress.


    I use to struggle with a double duvet I now have a king size one!!!!!I am only 5ft 4 so as you can imagine its fun :rotfl:


    A good nights sleep can make a massive difference to how you feel emotionally. I find I can deal with stuff better.


    You take care and try and get a decent nights sleep.


    Yours


    Calley x
    Hope for everything and expect nothing!!!

    Good enough is almost always good enough -Prof Barry Schwartz

    If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try -Seth Godin
  • Izadora
    Izadora Posts: 2,047
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    calleyw wrote: »
    Found out last night why AM says he loves me before he turns over to go to sleep, when he leaves for work in the morning and at the end of every phone call.

    I do exactly the same and for the same reason. It's something I've done with my parents since I was a kid and now do it with IzHe too.

    Torry, well done for changing your bed. It is an achievement and you're right that fresh sheets will feel nice.

    As a kid I was always adamant that I loved the feel of a fresh bed so much I'd have clean sheets every day when I was an adult. My mum was right that it wouldn't be such an appealing idea when I had to do my own washing... :D
  • dekaspace
    dekaspace Posts: 5,705
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    edited 7 August 2018 at 1:11PM
    Upset over silly reason, that interview for a job I didn't get it. This is despite them contacting me last week desperate to get me in for interview and saying I will start following day they were really pushy about getting me in to point they made a special arrangement for me to have the interview after the job officially closed, then somehow I fail!!!!


    What happened for them to reject me given their eagerness to start me, I went in clean shaven, ironed shirt and trousers smart shoes was polite, respectful, well spoken and answered questions honestly.


    It makes me feel if I can lose at a sure thing it destroys my confidence.


    Edit got second hand feedback and it was strange, got told I wasn't chatty enough!!! I am the person who normally gets told I chat too much (and my posts on this very website show how detailed I get) I got told I ONLY gave examples of when I was at primary school, this never happened I gave one example of my tech skills from an early age where I said even at primary school I was told by teachers to train the other kids, and when I worked in my last job I passed my training in 2 days rather than 2 weeks and was told to train the other staff as my personal and technical skills were that good.


    Somehow the interviewer only listened to the bit I said about primary school.
  • Torry_Quine
    Torry_Quine Posts: 18,827
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    edited 7 August 2018 at 7:29PM
    calleyw wrote: »
    Torry,


    You are indeed correct, I wont be contacting him in anyway. But its nagging at me. And making me worry about what his next move is. I know over thinking stuff.



    Can I ask a question. Do you have routine? get up, go to bed etc at the same time?


    This may sound strange but would a journal of your thoughts and feelings everyday help. it gets it out of your head and on the page.


    It also may help you to see how far you have come. Even when you feel that you have made no progress.


    I use to struggle with a double duvet I now have a king size one!!!!!I am only 5ft 4 so as you can imagine its fun :rotfl:


    A good nights sleep can make a massive difference to how you feel emotionally. I find I can deal with stuff better.


    You take care and try and get a decent nights sleep.


    Yours


    Calley x
    I do keep a journal telling my husband about my day and all about my feelings.

    I'm only 5'2" and my duvet is king size usually although I'm using my light weight one just now which is a double.

    I try to go to bed and get up at the same time .
    Izadora wrote: »
    I do exactly the same and for the same reason. It's something I've done with my parents since I was a kid and now do it with IzHe too.

    Torry, well done for changing your bed. It is an achievement and you're right that fresh sheets will feel nice.

    As a kid I was always adamant that I loved the feel of a fresh bed so much I'd have clean sheets every day when I was an adult. My mum was right that it wouldn't be such an appealing idea when I had to do my own washing... :D

    Keep saying it.:(



    I don't remember what we said that last night.

    Today is a year since my cousin's husband died and tomorrow is a year since we were told my husband had brain secondarily.
    Lost my soulmate so life is empty.

    I can bear pain myself, he said softly, but I couldna bear yours. That would take more strength than I have -
    Diana Gabaldon, Outlander
  • Torry_Quine
    Torry_Quine Posts: 18,827
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    Feeling scared tonight that I might do something to be with him.
    Lost my soulmate so life is empty.

    I can bear pain myself, he said softly, but I couldna bear yours. That would take more strength than I have -
    Diana Gabaldon, Outlander
  • calleyw
    calleyw Posts: 9,822
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    Feeling scared tonight that I might do something to be with him.


    Torry,


    Please don't do that. I know you are in a lot of mental pain.


    Please call the Samaritans 116 123 (UK) now!!!!



    I will give you my number in a PM to call if need be. But don't do this.



    Massive hugs



    Yours


    Calley x
    Hope for everything and expect nothing!!!

    Good enough is almost always good enough -Prof Barry Schwartz

    If it scares you, it might be a good thing to try -Seth Godin
  • elsien
    elsien Posts: 32,522
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    Torrey, try hang on in there. We can't possibly know what you're feeling, but we can see how much pain you are in. Anything I say will probably sound trite right now. But you matter to people, however much it hurts to try to carry on. Just take it an hour at a time.
    If you don't want to talk, Samaritans can just be there on the end of the phone so you know you're not alone. You don't have to be strong. You don't have to be anything. If it's really bad you can take yourself to A&E.
    Will be thinking about you tonight and through the night.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
  • jobbingmusician
    jobbingmusician Posts: 20,343
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    Yes, we are all with you. Post on here as much as you need xxxxxxxxxxx
    I was a board guide here for many years, but have now resigned. Amicably, but I think it reflects very poorly on MSE that I have not even received an acknowledgement of my resignation! Poor show, MSE.

    This signature was changed on 6.4.22. This is an experiment to see if anyone from MSE picks up on this comment.
  • System
    System Posts: 178,077
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    Feeling scared tonight that I might do something to be with him.
    Please don't. I know i can't speak for him but would your husband want you doing that? :( If i passed i wouldn't want Swain to do that, i'd want him to keep going and live life even if it was without me. I'm sorry your pain feels too much right now. I've been at the point where i wanted it to end, when my grandad died i didnt deal with it well and wanted to be back with him, but i couldnt do that to my family still here. He wouldnt have wanted it either.

    Stay here, talk to us, talk to samaratains, just please stay with us
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