Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

HairyHandofDartmoor · 9 November 2018 at 8:33AM

I slept badly again, this time because because I was worried about money. DH has been up since 6.00am so he's obviously worried too

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I've got volunteering again this morning anyway, so that will take my mind off things. It sounds like it's raining but hopefully it will stop before I have to leave.

System · 9 November 2018 at 8:49AM

HH I am sorry to hear you didn't sleep well , money worries are terrible and always seem to arrive at bedtime. Can you nail what has changed to make your income so sporadic now , earlier in the year it didn't seem an issue ? It is the last thing you need to be worrying about . Glad to hear the doctor has put you down for counselling I hope it doesn't take long for you to receive this and that it helps you.

Enjoy your volunteering, one day there may well be an opening for you in the school. Hoping DH isn't to stressed as well.

Have a good day as possible.

[Deleted User] · 9 November 2018 at 9:15AM

Sorry to hear you and DH are so stressed about money again. I know how much the anxiety takes over your life, I endured it for massive parts of mine. I know I still have debt issues but I feel I'm controlling them at long last rather than the other way round and I never thought that day would come. My own experiences have changed my thinking completely, I'm a different person now. Although whenever I struggled out of debt in the past I vowed never to get into the same situation again but I always ended up in the mire:o. This time it's different though, the journey to debt freedom has been longer and far more gruelling this time around because of my age, the fact I only have pensions rather than a job now and the obscene amount of debt I started with.

one of the worst aspects of debt and shortage of money is the way things are out of your control. There's that sense of hopelessness that whatever you do will only bring you back to square one. Like managing to pay off a small debt or big bill but ending up completely penniless. Then some money does appear from somewhere and there's a short feeling of euphoria that the next few bills can be paid with maybe a tiny bit to spare:j. Then the next emergency or demand for payment hits where you just don't have the money to pay and the terrifying feeling of what steps the creditors will take. It's just awful, I know from going through it and my heart goes out to you and DH because not only are you soldiering on providing a stable home for your boys but are still contending with the grief for the loss of your Mum.

You're doing so well to keep it all together, HH. I'm full of admiration for how you're coping with all this:A. I hope today's volunteering will be enjoyable and that you'll come away feeling that your spirits have been lifted. There's nothing like spending time with young children when you're 'down' is there? Their infectious joie de vivre is catching:j

I worry about your DH too. He sounds like a lovely, caring person like you are and stress is the worst thing for a middle aged man especially one with high BP as I think you said yours has. I'm sending hugs and hopes to all of you:kisses3:. So many rogues in this life end up living in clover while decent heard-working people like you are struggling to get through every day. All I can say is Life Sucks:mad:

Willowtree222 · 9 November 2018 at 9:31AM

I'm so sorry that your not sleeping and it is affecting DH too. I wish life was so different for so many different people that I have met both on here and in real life.

x

HairyHandofDartmoor · 9 November 2018 at 9:39AM

Thanks Cumbria

. Our current financial difficulties are due to two customers cancelling regular contracts. One is in financial difficulties and the other has decided to spend money on something different (not something we can provide). So we're down a thousand a month. Financial difficulty customer gave us zero notice, the other gave us a month's notice

DH has managed to replace one but not the other yet, plus other short term work seems to be not turning up at the moment

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Willowtree222 · 9 November 2018 at 10:03AM

Sorry about the customers. Not an ideal situation x

Onebrokelady · 9 November 2018 at 11:25AM

So sorry to hear you are feeling stressed out about money,it's always at night when you are trying to sleep that worries start to go round in your head,it's the last thing you need at the moment
I'm wracking my brains trying to think of something to suggest,the only thing I can come up with is a temporary Christmas job,there are usually quite a few places advertising now for temporary staff or if you are worried about being out of the job market and not having any job experience maybe a cleaning job,I've done loads of cleaning jobs in the past including working for Rentokill ( I used to tell people I was an assassin if they asked me what job I did:rotfl: )
Office cleaning jobs are quite often a doddle or you could sign on with an agency I used to do one cleaning job where I had a key so I could pretty much go in when I wanted so long as they were closed
I hope your DH manages to get another contract soon,you really do not deserve to be in this situation xx

jwil · 9 November 2018 at 1:45PM

Agree with one broke lady signing up with an agency might be an option? You could pretty much pick and choose when you work then and just do some short term roles. There will be all sorts of options, cleaning, office etc.

HairyHandofDartmoor · 9 November 2018 at 2:07PM

carbootcrazy wrote: »

one of the worst aspects of debt and shortage of money is the way things are out of your control. There's that sense of hopelessness that whatever you do will only bring you back to square one. Like managing to pay off a small debt or big bill but ending up completely penniless. Then some money does appear from somewhere and there's a short feeling of euphoria that the next few bills can be paid with maybe a tiny bit to spare:j. Then the next emergency or demand for payment hits where you just don't have the money to pay and the terrifying feeling of what steps the creditors will take. It's just awful, I know from going through it and my heart goes out to you and DH because not only are you soldiering on providing a stable home for your boys but are still contending with the grief for the loss of your Mum.

Thanks Carboot. Thst's exactly what it's like, a stress rollercoaster

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HairyHandofDartmoor · 9 November 2018 at 2:15PM

Nicnak wrote: »

I'm so sorry that your not sleeping and it is affecting DH too. I wish life was so different for so many different people that I have met both on here and in real life.

x

Thanks Nicnak

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Onebrokelady wrote: »

So sorry to hear you are feeling stressed out about money,it's always at night when you are trying to sleep that worries start to go round in your head,it's the last thing you need at the moment
I'm wracking my brains trying to think of something to suggest,the only thing I can come up with is a temporary Christmas job,there are usually quite a few places advertising now for temporary staff or if you are worried about being out of the job market and not having any job experience maybe a cleaning job,I've done loads of cleaning jobs in the past including working for Rentokill ( I used to tell people I was an assassin if they asked me what job I did:rotfl: )
Office cleaning jobs are quite often a doddle or you could sign on with an agency I used to do one cleaning job where I had a key so I could pretty much go in when I wanted so long as they were closed
I hope your DH manages to get another contract soon,you really do not deserve to be in this situation xx

Thanks OBL

.

jwil wrote: »

Agree with one broke lady signing up with an agency might be an option? You could pretty much pick and choose when you work then and just do some short term roles. There will be all sorts of options, cleaning, office etc.

Thanks Jwil

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I could try for a cleaning job, but the trouble is I'm a partner in the business and the profits are split fifty fifty between DH and me. A temporary job would affect this and may mean DH had to pay tax. It would certainly make our tax and accounts complicated

. I really need a full time job, then I could become a sleeping partner, but I would need to know that I was earning enough to be better off financially and make up for any tax DH might be liable for. It's very complicated when you're self employed

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I'd have to talk to our accountants and ask them whether a temporary job would make our finances better or worse off iyswim.

Finally Debt Free After 34 Years, But Still Need to Live Frugally

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