Wording for donations instead of a gift

iclayt · 6 December 2018 at 10:17AM

I am taking the plunge this year and instead of guilt, stress and panic about what to buy people while on a budget, and posting it to friends and family across the country, which soon makes costs go up, I am making £10-£20 donations to charities instead. For example for a friend in Scotland passionate about the coast and wildlife I have donated to a beach plastic-picking organisation near her. I intend to print out the confirmations and add it to their Christmas cards being posted next week.
That said I am still very worried about "how it looks" as we always do presents and I haven't given any "warning" that I'm not. I fully expect presents to arrive for our family soon.
I really can't think how to word on in the card that I'm not being tight or lazy, I'm just trying to cut back and do something worthwhile at the same time but I don't want to make it about me...
Does anyone have any suggestions on wording I could use?

Katiehound · 6 December 2018 at 2:23PM

Sorry I can't help with the wording but I think if it were me I would be phoning up folk asap and telling them what you are doing.. now. (I possibly would have done so even earlier, before they went shopping!)

In the past I have bought friends 'alternative gifts' such as mozzie nets, chickens, goats etc.
I think I probably said something along the lines of:
"By now I think most of us have all the goodies that we need so instead of more tat! I have bought you a gift voucher for xxxx, a charity which is working in an area that hopefully, will interest you.
Hope you enjoy hearing how this gift is helping xxx."

Don't know if that is helpful!

Pollycat · 7 December 2018 at 9:36AM

Katiehound wrote: »

Sorry I can't help with the wording but I think if it were me I would be phoning up folk asap and telling them what you are doing.. now. (I possibly would have done so even earlier, before they went shopping!)

In the past I have bought friends 'alternative gifts' such as mozzie nets, chickens, goats etc.
I think I probably said something along the lines of:
"By now I think most of us have all the goodies that we need so instead of more tat! I have bought you a gift voucher for xxxx, a charity which is working in an area that hopefully, will interest you.
Hope you enjoy hearing how this gift is helping xxx."

Don't know if that is helpful!

I think it's very late to be announcing that you're not 'doing presents' this year - even more so if you're planning to say that in Christmas cards you're posting next week.
Be prepared for some flack.
I agree with your sentiments (I only buy for a few people) but your timing sucks.

Katiehound · 7 December 2018 at 12:50PM

Pollycat wrote: »

I think it's very late to be announcing that you're not 'doing presents' this year - even more so if you're planning to say that in Christmas cards you're posting next week.
Be prepared for some flack.
I agree with your sentiments (I only buy for a few people) but your timing sucks.

Absolutely agree!
When I did this I told folk well in advance..... in fact I think I dropped the first hints maybe at Christmas with .. 'I'm thinking that next year I shall cut down on actual presents and do something else, what are your thoughts about that?

mangog · 7 December 2018 at 1:25PM

I don't think you've left it too late at all. I don't see that they need a 'warning' either - they still getting a gift, it's just not more 'stuff'. I think this is a lovely idea and I would be delighted to receive this instead of more things I don't really need. I'd also imagine there are a lot of people in your family who feel the same as you and would be relieved that someone did something about it this year! The best gift my sister ever gave my family was being brave enough to suggest not doing presents any more - we'd all been thinking it but were too scared to say it!

I would make it clear in your message that you chose each charity especially for that person based on their interests, and use that to say something nice about that person - along the lines of "I've always admired your passion and commitment to the environment and your community so I've chosen this charity for you".

Good for you for making a change this year! Stand by it - you're doing a lovely thing.

[Deleted User] · 7 December 2018 at 5:13PM

Hmm not all families are as philanthropic and I can see danger ahead.

Personally I would do gifts as usual and then state your plans clearly for next year.

kazwookie · 7 December 2018 at 5:20PM

I think it is a great idea, I wouldn't worry too much about it being 'late'

I hate it when folk 'expect' presents or similar.

I also wouldn't worry people think you are lazy or tight, they will get over it.

Katiehound · 7 December 2018 at 8:03PM

As they say you can't please all of the people all of the time so whatever you do someone will take umbrage! If that is the case I would be tempted to refer to the original thoughts of Christmas- not the commercialised horror that it has become (extending over months!!)

Good luck!

(But the right move, there are loads of worthwhile charities who would welcome donations....... and use that money wisely)

martinnathalie9 · 11 December 2018 at 6:30PM

It is a lovely idea, I was gifted something like this a few Christmasses ago and it was included in the Christmas card. They simply included a lovely little message which explained that we had helped farmers in India. I love the idea of 'gifting back' helps the world and makes you feel good too!

iclayt · 11 December 2018 at 8:35PM

Thank you for your feedback everyone. My timing may "suck" but I hadn't done much present shopping either so was getting stressed either way. If friends aren't very happy I'll deal with the fallout afterwards (one has told me my xmas present is awaiting collection by me from my nearest locker and sent me the code, very festive...) but I feel so much better for doing it - I have still got a couple of stocking fillers for very close family which I already bought but there is always next year.

Thanks

kittennose · 19 December 2018 at 11:30AM

Hmm I think everyone will just see it as lazy.

But good luck.

Wording for donations instead of a gift

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