Self-doubt - what will happen after DFD?

I totally get where your coming from, I worry a bit about this too!! and I guess each person will be different.

I know through the pain this has put my loved ones through that never again will I get into debt, I will be too scared to hurt them again and lose their trust. I hope this is enough to keep me on the straight and narrow, buit who can tell what the future holds for any of us? I guess its a bit like an addiction, and thus you need to take it one day at a time, allow yourself a treat, but make them just that, occassional treats, 1 holiday a year, 1 takeway a month, one clothes purchase a month. If you budget for the treats then there is no harm in them.

Not much help I guess, but didnt wanna leave you hanging!

Good luck with your DFD :beer:

I've been debt free for a year now and it's a great feeling.

I've recently been made redundant and previously I would have been filled with dread but now it's ok. After paying back the debt we saved for a wedding (Oct last year) and then saved 6 months worth of essential expenditure. Hubby still has a job and all expenses can be paid using his money alone. Neither of us are feeling a huge financial strain and we're still managing to save and overpay the mortgage.

None of this would have been possible if I hadn't repaid my debt.

I'm not sure what to advise you really but I can say that my experience of the debt made me not want to ever be in that situation ever again. You can have the jacuzzi bath but save up for it instead of getting it on credit. I definitely enjoy things more now they are paid immediately rather than later and at a much higher cost.

You've only been debt busting for 6 months so maybe you need a few more months of "pain" before the lesson is learned

From my experience, it depends on how / why you got into debt in the first place. For example was it because you spent lavishly on clothes, furniture, cars, holidays etc on easily obtained CCs and loans, overstretched yourself on a mortgage, MEWed, ie, the 'because I'm worth it' syndrome, or was it simply because it costs so much to live & bring up kids, or you lost your job, became ill, disabled, split up, had to be a carer etc? You need to think about why it happened. If the latter case, it may well just pass with time and a different life stage. If the former, well, the choice is yours and yours alone.

For me (I am probably much older than most of you on here), it was bringing up 3 kids on OH's low wages - my youngest is 26, and childcare was not available then, at least where I lived, unless you were either rich, or a social services case (no offence intended to anyone who receives help from social services - it was a different time), and OH's work hours did not make my working possible. Also, no tax credits, or anything like that were available. So, we got into 15K 's worth of CC debt. It was a struggle; we could not afford hardly anything new - furniture, clothes, anything. Shopping was often jumble sales and charity shops, and things that people threw out. And then, when my youngest child started school (remember she is 26 now) I went to uni, got a degree, got a decent job and paid it all back, every penny. And vowed that I would never be in that position again. And I haven't. We now own our own house, have savings, and no debts. We are still pretty frugal - we only eat out about once a month if that for example (but then I really like cooking), hardly ever 'shop' except for necessities, are not really into holidays (my job involves lots of travel, including overseas - holidays for me consist of being at home). Our house is slowly getting done up as and when we can afford to pay cash for it. Oddly, it seems that our old second hand and thrown out furniture and household goods are now considered quite stylish and desirable, maybe even quite valuable.

One added bonus is that two of my children are very organised indeed on the cash front , though in very different circumstances - the other one though not quite so, but then he was never very organised on any front, bless. But he is a great Dad, and we help them out where we can.

Having said that, we have never been in some of the awful situations that people on here sometimes describe :eek: even though when our kids were small, people on benefits regularly got more than my very hard working OH earned (he works on a farm). We have always had enough to eat (even if it often had to be 'stretched' in various ways, see the OS board for tips if interested), and been fortunate that we have always lived in really nice rural locations, though often in cold, damp accommodation that would now be condemned if council etc.

I guess the moral is, it is really up to the OP and whatever they decide to do.

Good luck, whatever it is!

I got into debt because I saw my wage as this huge sum of money that could buy all kinds of treats. I became debt free last month and the first thing I did was draw up a budget so that my new found 'wealth' didn't trick me again! Now we put £250 a month into a trips and holidays account, and have a staggering 13 different savings accounts, 8 of which are for piggybank banking to help us budget.

All the money you throw at the debts now, you need to work out how you're going to spend/save this once you get debt free and read all of Martin's articles on budgetting, it takes a bit of getting used to but I think the stabalisers can come off my DF-bike soon.

D x