Hospital Appointment Transport

135

Comments

  • It is lovely that you are taking the time to visit this lady once a week given that you are (ex) neighbours and not family. Totally inappopropriate to put you on the spot about taking on more responsibility especially in front of her. A less nice person would just avoid the whole question by not visiting again.

    I think you should speak privately with the home manager and explain that you are not family, you don’t drive, and the best you can do is to visit once a week and you’d appreciate it if they could keep in mind that it’s not appropriate to ask you to take on additional responsibilities, you are doing quite enough. And so you are.

    And be proud of yourself, you are already doing the right thing, do not start to feel you should be doing more. That’s a lot as it is.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    choille wrote: »
    My elderly ex neighbour is now in a (very expensive to my mind) care home.

    The pressure was put on in front of the elderly lady and she seemed to feel like a nuisance now.
    Totally inappopropriate to put you on the spot about taking on more responsibility especially in front of her.

    I think you should speak privately with the home manager and explain that you are not family, you don’t drive, and the best you can do is to visit once a week and you’d appreciate it if they could keep in mind that it’s not appropriate to ask you to take on additional responsibilities, you are doing quite enough. And so you are.

    As well as confirming that you are doing as much as you can by visiting, ask her whether their client would have been made to feel so uncomfortable if a Care Quality Commission inspector had been present - very unlikely!
  • choille
    choille Posts: 9,710 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post
    Thanks for that. I just do feel sorry for her really but would have thought that with the fess they are getting they would take care of all that side of things and not worry her with it.
    It seems that the chiropodist is ill and they want £30 for someone to cut her toe nails which I also thought was rather strange as I thought that that would be done free on the NHS.
    This is all an eye opener to me.
  • unforeseen
    unforeseen Posts: 7,279 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post
    Podiatry in most areas is only if referred by a GP now.

    I doubt that routine nail cutting would get referred.
  • 74jax
    74jax Posts: 7,921 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    choille wrote: »
    .
    It seems that the chiropodist is ill and they want £30 for someone to cut her toe nails which I also thought was rather strange as I thought that that would be done free on the NHS.
    This is all an eye opener to me.

    I totally agree :(

    We pay 26 a month for a chiropodist, we also have to pay separately for mum to have her hair washed and dried - even though they bath her.... Apparently 'styling' isn't part of bathing, which I agree to a point, but she's 85 and isn't exactly wanting a 'do' to go clubbing.. :rotfl:

    If she gets ingrown toenails I think that will be dealt with on the NHS but obviously it's not nice to get to that point.
    Forty and fabulous, well that's what my cards say....
  • Kim_kim
    Kim_kim Posts: 3,726 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post
    74jax wrote: »
    I'm totally with you, out of order to ask in front of people and to push it with you. I even said further up I didn't even take my dad and I was only 90mins away, you shouldn't feel guilty.

    My mountain molehills was aimed at asking the care worker what contraception she was on.... This I don't relate to the problem at all. I personally don't get why you would want to ask (yes I know you didn't suggest it) . I do however understand why the care home would ask if you could take a friend to a hospital appointment. However the moment you said no should have been the end of it.

    I honestly don't think you need ask about there contraception to make a point ....

    I’m sure that was never really serious.
    It was just making a point about privacy, which the care home seem to need a refresher in.
  • choille
    choille Posts: 9,710 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post
    74jax wrote: »
    I totally agree :(

    We pay 26 a month for a chiropodist, we also have to pay separately for mum to have her hair washed and dried - even though they bath her.... Apparently 'styling' isn't part of bathing, which I agree to a point, but she's 85 and isn't exactly wanting a 'do' to go clubbing.. :rotfl:

    If she gets ingrown toenails I think that will be dealt with on the NHS but obviously it's not nice to get to that point.

    Goodness. The ex neighbour is in her early 90s and can't bend to cut her own toe nails. I'm shocked that it's like this for you with your Mum.
    She also has someone wash & blow dry her hair & that's another £30 - she doesn't take long as ex neighbour doesn't have a lot of hair really:o
  • Savvy_Sue
    Savvy_Sue Posts: 46,017 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    74jax wrote: »
    I didn't take my dad to his appointments and he was only 1.5hrs away. And I drive.
    Actually we nearly had a problem when Dad was getting hospital transport to his appointments and one of us was SOMETIMES able to meet him there and then take him home, thus removing the need for him to sit and wait at the hospital after his appointment and then spend a couple of hours going the scenic route home - he'd usually be one of the last to be dropped off.

    He was told that if he could get a lift home, then he shouldn't be asking for hospital transport to get there. Ever. Even if it was only one occasion when one of us was able to do this for him.

    I had words with PALS, and that was the end of that.
    choille wrote: »
    It seems that the chiropodist is ill and they want £30 for someone to cut her toe nails which I also thought was rather strange as I thought that that would be done free on the NHS.
    There's limited access to NHS podiatry these days, and domiciliary services probably cut to the bone. Although why the home are mentioning these things to you - is it the home? see below ...
    choille wrote: »
    This is all an eye opener to me.
    I get the impression - perhaps wrongly - that she has family, just not locally. Unless you've been appointed as her attorney - which you'd surely have mentioned by now - then I would 'encourage' the care home to speak to her relatives about financial matters, and 'discourage' them from mentioning them to you.

    Also I don't know if you have any contact with her family, and if they or she would welcome you letting them know how she's getting on?

    but if either she or the home have any concerns about paying for additional services, you're not really the appropriate person to raise them with ...
    Signature removed for peace of mind
  • choille
    choille Posts: 9,710 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post
    It's the lady herself who is mentioning the costs & lack of chiropodist to me.
  • elsien
    elsien Posts: 32,684 Forumite
    Name Dropper Photogenic First Anniversary First Post
    edited 11 February 2019 at 9:07AM
    Chiropody on the NHS is only for those where there is a clear medical need such as diabetes or (in some circumstances) circulation issues, etc. Care staff are told not to do it themselves because of liability if something goes wrong. Not being able to reach your feet is a social care not a medical need so doesn't qualify you for free foot care - nothing to do with being a self funder.
    This is also the same for longer stay patients in hospital where families would be asked to pay for chiropody. I was unable to get a proper answer from ward staff as to what they would do for patients who didn't have family to sort it.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
This discussion has been closed.
Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 343.1K Banking & Borrowing
  • 250.1K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 449.7K Spending & Discounts
  • 235.2K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 607.9K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 173K Life & Family
  • 247.8K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.9K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards