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  • FIRST POST
    • jules81
    • By jules81 11th Nov 18, 3:48 PM
    • 70Posts
    • 295Thanks
    jules81
    Saving the pennies......
    • #1
    • 11th Nov 18, 3:48 PM
    Saving the pennies...... 11th Nov 18 at 3:48 PM
    I am 37 i am married and have a 6 year old son

    Unfortunately I suffer from serve mental health problems -been hospitalized 10 x since 2012 for up to 6 months at a time. I also suffer with ME/CFS. I currently have a person budget and a carer to help me 4 x a week-this carer has been with me for just over a year since my last 6 month hospital admission.

    I've never taken our son abroad ( or been abroad since he's been abroad since 2010) but when he's 10-12 i am hoping to take him to disneyland florida. This will depend on my mh. BUT I've just started doung 3 hours term time volunteers in a schild nursery i worked from when I left college till I had my son when I was 30. I ve always worked within childcare/care for elderly mainly in a nursery and as a nanny. I am really hoping I can up my hour after Christmas to 6 and then apply for supply work in a nursery. As i think i can sort of test the water as long as i do under 16 hours a week. But I am so scared it will set Mr back-but fear is a massive anxiety for me.

    Anyway next year we have 3 holiday

    Sun caravan holiday 3 nights -£67 paid not sure how much left to pay under £100 this is for my son birthday in feb-its goung to be cold got to be paid in Dec-splitting cost with a friend as she's coming too

    2 days in lego land in june-never been we are goung to look at deaks on black fri hubby is paying for this but I am going to save £20 -£40 a month

    Mon-fri in Debyshire aug -£251 paid-need to save £30 a month spending

    We have a mortgage i pay half of that and half of all the bills. Plus all pet insurance for my looyal moggy who is my fur baby.

    I have BPD and have a spending issue so I really hope keeping this will keep me on track.

    I need to look into savings and pension -but will attack things slowly.

    Xxx
Page 1
    • savingwannabe
    • By savingwannabe 11th Nov 18, 5:40 PM
    • 13,983 Posts
    • 47,484 Thanks
    savingwannabe
    • #2
    • 11th Nov 18, 5:40 PM
    • #2
    • 11th Nov 18, 5:40 PM
    Hello jules, welcome to the forum. We would be happy for you to post. Here's to happy savings
    Christmas Fund £148
    Reminder: June Spending on fleabay £6.99
    • jules81
    • By jules81 11th Nov 18, 10:31 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    • #3
    • 11th Nov 18, 10:31 PM
    • #3
    • 11th Nov 18, 10:31 PM
    Thank you lovely. I've used this site before. I was posting on a mh forum-but found it wasn't helping me-with my mind set ( it's been great support and i have met some lovely people) but i think my spending issues need to be addressed and i am hoping to follow people around here lead-to savings. So I figured this would help.

    I haven't saved any money for CHRISTMAS. ( i know-i buy all year in sales-so hoping to add and EDIT I can once I've posted ) -I am gping to put rough money I spent beside it-to know how much to save for next year-BUT o am still going to buy when I see in the sales as i have a big set of shelves which hold 6 40 liter boxes FULL of pressies. This also helps when D'S come home with a party invite for following weekend. I can't just go out and buy something at the shop as i cant go out alone-i suffer with panic attacks and dissociate at times so my pressie help me in long run plus the stress i would have having to have one by next week AND save money in the long run.

    Christmas 2018

    Son -6
    Next Dino bedding -sale £12
    Dino mat-£11
    Dino lamp £5 ( off gumtree)
    Uno jurrasic cards £12
    Lego set £25
    Dino cushion sale £5
    Jurrasic world figure £4 ( ordered from China hope it comes in time)
    Jurrasic world pencil case £1 Sale
    Jurrasic world bath egg £3
    2 Jurrasic world thshirts £8
    That's all stuff in my room need to check boxes tomorrow know we have bought
    2 h&m jurrasic world top and hoddie

    Hubby
    Southern comfort £22
    Jean next £14 sale
    Hulk daddy craft figure D'S choose at craft fayre £6
    T shirt sale £6 new look
    Plus card from DS

    Mum
    Jacket £20 in sale
    Perfume lancom mirace sale £32
    Pandora F bead ( my son's initials-for nanny ) sale£10
    Plus card from D'S

    Dad
    ?????

    Auntie and uncle
    Amazon stick-waiting till black fri sale

    Best friend
    Pandora charm sale £22

    Best find child 6 years old
    ????

    Friend 1 and her husband
    Gin£12 20% off in M&S
    Voucher????

    God child 1 7 years old
    Lego £16.66 ( sale)

    God children twins-4 years
    Lego £12
    ????? Clothes

    Friend little girl-6 years old
    Clothes and????

    Friend in Scotland
    ????

    Friend H children 1 6 years old
    Friend H child 2 2 years old
    Friend H child 3 1 year

    Nieces x 2 ( 18 and 14)
    Money

    My carer
    Crabtree and evelynn hand cream set x3 £6 sale

    Friend k little girl-4 year old

    I KNOW I buy for a lot but my friend honestly have seen me through during my mh at least 2 of them above have sat with me in hospital before I've been inpatient. We don't actual buy for each other jyst for each others children. Hubby gets his sister, his parents plus step parents and nicece and own friends and family-although i did buy 3 grandad pint glasses afyer fathers day for £3 each for his family
    Last edited by jules81; 11-11-2018 at 10:57 PM.
    • jules81
    • By jules81 11th Nov 18, 11:31 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    • #4
    • 11th Nov 18, 11:31 PM
    • #4
    • 11th Nov 18, 11:31 PM
    Now camping out on my 6 year olds floor because he's poorly-ear ache and temp xxxx
    • jules81
    • By jules81 12th Nov 18, 7:39 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    • #5
    • 12th Nov 18, 7:39 PM
    • #5
    • 12th Nov 18, 7:39 PM
    My poor son has had a temp and ear ache-but it did mean No spend day for me. Plus I sold some of his old clothes only for £4 but better than nothing. Going to add to Disney fund i already have going-i think there's between £200-300 ish it's not going to get us far but it's a start.

    Because I was up all night with D'S i haven't check people pressies. Hubby took morning of work to help me look after D'S and so o slept-on/off then my carer came in. I am using stuff up from freezer my goal is to keep shopping for the 3 of us under £50 a week. We have an almost full freezer. So shouldn't need much on aldi weds shop.

    I've also added 10 items of 26-24 size clothes I've grown out off ( YAY)on Facebook sites. Fx they will sell-I've put them for £1-5 i just want them gone.

    Xxxc
    • jules81
    • By jules81 13th Nov 18, 7:50 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    • #6
    • 13th Nov 18, 7:50 PM
    • #6
    • 13th Nov 18, 7:50 PM
    I've slept so much of today ready for tea out tonight. I spent £16 on my main and sons starter main and pudding and drinks and pudding for my friend little girl as her mum who gave us a lift. My legs and arms feel bruised i am scarred it's a ME flare up I've got vol for 2 hours tomorrow. Plus weigh in at weight watchers tomorrow night. I know I've gained this week.

    I got my licence back 3 months ago afyer it being vol surrendered for 6 years. I've got it for a year. But I am so scared of driving. I've driven 4 x with hubby and twice on my own.

    I went to aldi today sent £42 for a weeks worth of shopping for the 3 of us. Xxx
    • jules81
    • By jules81 14th Nov 18, 1:49 AM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    • #7
    • 14th Nov 18, 1:49 AM
    • #7
    • 14th Nov 18, 1:49 AM
    Can't sleep never can before volunteers I am thinking of doing Avon to get extra pennies. I don't know if it would work xxxx
    • pinknsparkly
    • By pinknsparkly 14th Nov 18, 10:14 AM
    • 352 Posts
    • 826 Thanks
    pinknsparkly
    • #8
    • 14th Nov 18, 10:14 AM
    • #8
    • 14th Nov 18, 10:14 AM
    Hi Jules, and welcome! I find this website super motivating. This particular sub-section of the MSE forum isn't as busy as other parts so I like to read through, and contribute, to other sections too (particularly debt free wannabe and mortgage free wannabe - I don't have debts or a mortgage but view our attempts to save to buy a house, and get a mortgage, as not too different to paying down debt!). I find it helpful in terms of motivation, which I can never have enough of!!!

    Hope your son is on the mend? £42 for food for the week is fab, congrats!

    A friend of mine passed his driving test about a decade ago and never drove again until last year. One of his neighbours is a driving instructor and offered to take him out a couple of times to give him refresher lessons. I don't know if that's something you can scrape together enough money for but if you can, it might help massively with your confidence! Also (this may not be practical) when I learnt to drive, my mum actually sat in the back of the car for the lessons as we lived in the middle of nowhere and the instructor wouldn't come to us. This meant that she then had a good idea of what things to point out/remind me/think about. Depending entirely on what your husband is like, you could consider this? My baby sister also used to have to come along to most of them in her carseat
    MFW 2019 challenge #99: £6,325.45 / £6,000
    MFiT-T5 (Jan 2019 - Jan 2022) challenge #99: £6,325.45 / £30,000
    Save £12k in 2019 challenge #99: £10,325.45 / £30,000
    2019 keep moving challenge: 232 / 1000 miles
    Last updated: 06/06/2019
    Initial MF date (18th Dec 2018): Jan 2054 Current MF date: Oct 2052
    • jules81
    • By jules81 25th Jan 19, 10:33 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    • #9
    • 25th Jan 19, 10:33 PM
    • #9
    • 25th Jan 19, 10:33 PM
    So alot has changed since i last wrote ive been back in a psychiatric unit. Very unwell. Still there. On leave at my parents house.

    Hubsband wants a divorce-i am devestated-i love him with all my heary. I felt my love was over. I am slowly picking up the picces.

    T
    Hes moving out once money is soryed snd with my patents help we are buyimg him out. Its all super scary and i feel overwhelmed at times.

    I am going to be paying my patents back forever. But i want something to leave DS when i die. I love him so much-it hurts so much i csnt be a proper mummy. I do sometimes think it would be better if he didnt have me in his life.

    I am going to TRY and save as much as i csn while keeping busy for my mh.

    For the next few days i am going to keep track on what i spend.

    My life has flipped. I dont know if i am ready to be out of hospital. Tomorrow i am going with a friend to a children farm. I am goung to find it hard without ds. But sat is a daddy day. So better i try and keep busy.

    My aims for tomorrow;
    Take PRN if needed
    Take a cold drink to not buy one.
    Go with a mug of coffe-to not buy one straight away
    Walk 6000 step
    Try and help my friend with her 3 children, 2 under 2.
    Take fiber one bar rather thsn buy desert at £6

    Ive got £25 to spend tomorrow.

    Xxxx
    • Skint yet Again
    • By Skint yet Again 26th Jan 19, 7:49 AM
    • 3,590 Posts
    • 19,241 Thanks
    Skint yet Again
    So sorry to hear about the awful time you've had jules. I am glad you are getting help and have support from your family, be kind to yourself and don't for a minute think your DS would be better without you. He will remember the love you give him despite the problems you face.
    Balance 0% credit card to pay £1360 £848
    Emergency fund 100/500
    • savingwannabe
    • By savingwannabe 26th Jan 19, 8:14 AM
    • 13,983 Posts
    • 47,484 Thanks
    savingwannabe
    Jules omg what a dreadful time you have had. Hopefully you can get used to being back at home slowly and spend time with your parents who will be there for you. Take it easy. Bless you.
    Christmas Fund £148
    Reminder: June Spending on fleabay £6.99
    • jules81
    • By jules81 26th Jan 19, 9:15 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    Thank you both so much.

    Unfortunately i struggled so much in night i phoned ward who phoned crisis team. Crisis team came out to see me ( and should be coming back with meds) i dont know if i need longer in hospital? My parents ate in there 70s and are struggling to cope with me.

    So didnt go out with my friends.

    Just went to sainsburys with my dad. Got
    Mum flowers-£4
    Mum 70th birthday card-£3
    Tub of sweets when we see my cousions children in April£4
    3x fiber one bars ( on offer) £4.50
    Toy for DS for birthday £4.50 instead on £9
    Deodrant £1.50
    Hot choc £1

    I remembered to use my nectar card. Ive got £30 in vouchers to use with ds over half term-if i am well enough.

    I am now in bath.

    I put a post on another part of forum as i am worried about money. When i do move 'home' not sure if it will really be home without ds? But my cat is there.

    Fob is taking tv so i know i need to buy one of them. I am keeping sofa and table and my bed and paying him off £400.

    Its so much to take in-my head is a mess xxx
    • jules81
    • By jules81 27th Jan 19, 4:13 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    So ive come 'home'

    My savings look like this-

    Holidays-caravan feb, aug cottage, oct butlins( all paid for caravan 1/2 by friend sun deal. Cottage paid in full when booked. Butlins pressie from grandparents for Christmas) so just need spending momey. All self catering.
    Feb£50
    Cottage-£300 ( some for petrol)
    Butlins-£300 ( again some for petrol)
    So meed £650 by oct
    Hoping to save £50 each month-£800 by oct but can maybe book sun caravan for next year out of this xxx

    Cat ( vet bills-have insurance-so for annual injections -dec 2019 (, food ( science plan) and flea/worming
    Savings£50
    Save -£15 a month

    Home insurance-due dec 2019
    £60
    Saved
    £10 per month

    I will add to this

    Savings-for things going wrong
    £300
    Hope to save £50 a month

    Xxxx
    • jules81
    • By jules81 27th Jan 19, 4:20 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    I Spent £7 on food for ds. Ds is living with fob-divorce is STILL really early days. He says he dosent want maintenance. I will have him 4 x 3 hours after school and 1 x 9.45-6 pm on weekend.

    I bought ds, crisps, brownie, ribena, apple juice and fish he likes. I have no idea on child maintance. I think bevause fob looks afyer his dad 2 x a week and works 3 other days ds will be intitled to school meals. I will feed him tea. But obviously Fob WILL do wadhing, heating, lighting etc. I feel it maybe beyter to dd money each week-however i LIKE to feel i am doing somethinh-so like buying ds bits.

    Right now i get pip and contributed esa-i am still paying half on all bills. If i am in hospital longer than 28 days my pip will stop. I go back tomorrow and see what consultant says.

    Xxxx
    • Skint yet Again
    • By Skint yet Again 28th Jan 19, 5:59 AM
    • 3,590 Posts
    • 19,241 Thanks
    Skint yet Again
    Good luck with everything Jules. It's hard enough going through a divorce without the mh and disability issues you face everyday too. It's good to have some nice holidays to save for and gives you something positive to focus on and to look forward to.
    Balance 0% credit card to pay £1360 £848
    Emergency fund 100/500
    • jules81
    • By jules81 28th Jan 19, 4:44 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    Yep it is hunny. I am looking forward to my hols espically ones with ds.

    Had a NSD

    At home with ds after school watching the good dinosaur

    Dad is sorting out house price with fib tonight-so we will roughly find out what i will owe my parents back.

    I was discharged from hospital-so at least i fong need to worry about pip stopping so 1 good thing.

    Ive got to go collect my meds at 7pm as they wernt ready. My dad is driving me. But psychatrist said i can drive not that i have car. But dads goung to add me on insurance come march.

    Ive been thinking about saving up to paint my room. Once i move back in. But that coukd be 6 months.

    Xxxx
    • savingwannabe
    • By savingwannabe 28th Jan 19, 5:03 PM
    • 13,983 Posts
    • 47,484 Thanks
    savingwannabe
    OMG. I am amazed you are still posting well done. It is great that you are staying with your parents and spending time with DS. Just take it a day at a time. Bless you. Sending hugs,
    Christmas Fund £148
    Reminder: June Spending on fleabay £6.99
    • jules81
    • By jules81 31st Jan 19, 11:15 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    The divorce has really hit me. Ive max out on PRN meds. I was nearly taken back into hospital yesterday when i saw crisis. I NEED to stay strong for DS.

    I went to mataland they had LOADS in sale-i bought NOTHING. But we went to morrision i bought DS tea for next week ( mostly reduced meat) spent £21. But £7 was on cardi i might take back. Plus 2 pot PB2 which was £8. Ds he ate chicken breast new pot and peas. Had a brownie a cut up apple and toast and peanut butter-i think he maybe going through growth spurt! He went to carer group tonight. He likes it there.

    Saw DS rang and updated tax creduts with actual income-not esteimate. That was a LONG phone call. We will owe it back once fob and ds move out i will stop claim.

    I am not sure how i will cope for money i get ESA contribution based and PIP

    While FOB is in the house. I am just paying mortgage AND some water-not sure on amount. We need to figure it out. I do all my washing up there ( mums in her 70 she cant do it) and cook ds tea there 5 x a week. And heat up my soup ( i cant swallow-they think its anxiety-so living off soup right now.

    It was mums 70th birthday we hope to go to hotel 40 mins away tomorrow and sat night. Because FOB hasnt told me about bills i am unsure of money. Ds is coming down sat for meal ( dad has said he will pay-dont think he should pay for fob but bet he ends up doing so) so i only need money for tea ( soup tomorrow) and will buy my parents a drink-mum will be white wine spritz dad may even have coke and coffee after meal-maybe treat mum to bailey one. So £25. We get breakfast-hoping they may do scrambled egg and tom? I might eat that. Bought cuppa soup for lunch then enterance to playcentre for us all £10. Hope fob will get coffees. Then play on 2p machines-ive got £4 ish in 2ps. Then meal. Fob and ds are leaving at 6pm ish.Sun breakfast. Ds is having breakfast with us at 10am Then will probably take ds to park ( bought loaf of bread to feed ducks today) maybe buy him ice cream ( i know there is snow-BUT he 6 ) so hoping the £50 in bank will be enough. Ive had 1 drink out this week a cogfee with my auntie at a farm shop. I am trying to STOP unnecessarily spending.

    Next month i need to work money coming in/going out when i have house on my own. Eek. I hope i can survive.

    Thank you for reading xxxx
    • jules81
    • By jules81 1st Feb 19, 12:25 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 295 Thanks
    jules81
    I bought a shrug, some trousers for ds and teosers for me £13 online from m & s

    My heads REALLY strugglying today. Fob sent a txt and i bite back-i wish i hadnt. I could just cry. My emotions are so raw.

    Xxxx
    • savingwannabe
    • By savingwannabe 1st Feb 19, 4:25 PM
    • 13,983 Posts
    • 47,484 Thanks
    savingwannabe
    I hope you are feeling better. Can your hospital recommend someone to help you with the finances?
    Christmas Fund £148
    Reminder: June Spending on fleabay £6.99
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