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  • FIRST POST
    • Indie Kid
    • By Indie Kid 6th Jan 14, 12:31 PM
    • 21,629Posts
    • 29,326Thanks
    Indie Kid
    Things that made you smile
    • #1
    • 6th Jan 14, 12:31 PM
    Things that made you smile 6th Jan 14 at 12:31 PM
    We have a what's irritating you thread, and I think we need a thread for things that have made us smile, etc.

    Me - well, we have a puppy who is now 8 months. I let her out this morning and was hoping to keep the door open for her to come in. But it was too windy. I was stood by the door waiting for her, expecting to see her come down the steps.

    I then heard a tap at the door. She'd come down the steps, which I hadn't seen and tapped to be let in. She also taps to go out.
    Sealed pot challenge #232. Gold stars from Sue-UU - 75.29 banked
    50p saver #40 20 banked
    Virtual sealed pot #178 80.25
Page 201
    • Opalfruity
    • By Opalfruity 6th Aug 19, 6:24 AM
    • 7 Posts
    • 15 Thanks
    Opalfruity
    Being allowed to join this forum today and start posting straight away, without any hassle!

    I've had several attempts at joining the Digital Spy forum, where I receive a message telling me I should get an activation email within 48 hours - but the activation email never arrives!
    • duncanthedog
    • By duncanthedog 7th Aug 19, 6:21 AM
    • 617 Posts
    • 1,412 Thanks
    duncanthedog
    Doesn't take much to get Dad smiling, finding 4 pennies on the ground outside the papershop this morning was enough to turn his frown upside down
    • duncanthedog
    • By duncanthedog 9th Aug 19, 7:18 AM
    • 617 Posts
    • 1,412 Thanks
    duncanthedog


    Smile at the thought of a Morris Minor fitted with a Tesla electric motor

    Where do I sign up?
    • Sleazy
    • By Sleazy 10th Aug 19, 6:56 PM
    • 18,084 Posts
    • 38,723 Thanks
    Sleazy
    The name of the new leader of UKIP

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-49307101

    I wonder what newscasters will shorten his name to?
    Weekly Distance Walked 30km / Total For Year 1046 km
    • tealady
    • By tealady 11th Aug 19, 8:27 AM
    • 3,122 Posts
    • 4,044 Thanks
    tealady
    The name of the new leader of UKIP

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-49307101

    I wonder what newscasters will shorten his name to?
    Originally posted by Sleazy
    I think that's a no brainer!
    Proud to be an MSE nerd
    Judge people by their achievements, not by their mistakes
    • MissPickle
    • By MissPickle 11th Aug 19, 10:32 PM
    • 1,679 Posts
    • 2,091 Thanks
    MissPickle
    Cardi gave me flowers

    Night everyone. Sweet dreams x
    Smile... It'll confuse em.
    • joansgirl
    • By joansgirl 12th Aug 19, 6:51 AM
    • 15,373 Posts
    • 58,789 Thanks
    joansgirl
    I moved the garden furniture round yesterday, gone back to how it was pre flood (2007). It's so much better, I now have a nice comfortable place in the garden to sit and have breakfast/lunch or a nice cuppa
    Some people only exist as examples of what to avoid...
    .
    • DigForVictory
    • By DigForVictory 12th Aug 19, 7:15 AM
    • 9,937 Posts
    • 34,144 Thanks
    DigForVictory
    Son tried the home made strawberry jam & pronounced it "ace!".
    I could have lived without the surprise in his voice, but I did make it for them to enjoy.
    • Pierre the Llittlebarski
    • By Pierre the Llittlebarski 13th Aug 19, 8:15 AM
    • 26 Posts
    • 43 Thanks
    Pierre the Llittlebarski
    Glasgow Rangers FC, kicking butt.


    England Rugby, kicking more butt.
    I don't know when I, when I'll be content,
    I do know that I need, a brand new friend.
    • DigForVictory
    • By DigForVictory 13th Aug 19, 9:36 PM
    • 9,937 Posts
    • 34,144 Thanks
    DigForVictory
    Son who has left home was told of the amazing stuff his brothers were devouring & has taken a jar back to his flat, swaddled in bubble wrap and laundry lest it take harm in transit!
    • duncanthedog
    • By duncanthedog 14th Aug 19, 2:38 PM
    • 617 Posts
    • 1,412 Thanks
    duncanthedog
    Overheard this said last night

    "Time may be a great healer but it is no beautician"
    • DigForVictory
    • By DigForVictory 15th Aug 19, 8:33 AM
    • 9,937 Posts
    • 34,144 Thanks
    DigForVictory
    Son has done well in his BTEC & though less well in his A levels, will be going off to start his apprenticeship as planned in another 3 weeks,

    All health, strength, courage, & clear phone lines for all parents who are not as happy with the results day outcomes.
    • Sleazy
    • By Sleazy 16th Aug 19, 7:27 PM
    • 18,084 Posts
    • 38,723 Thanks
    Sleazy
    https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/9738152/danes-mock-donald-trump-suggestion-buying-greenland/
    Weekly Distance Walked 30km / Total For Year 1046 km
    • pollypenny
    • By pollypenny 17th Aug 19, 7:42 AM
    • 26,482 Posts
    • 69,871 Thanks
    pollypenny
    The colour of the sky last night when I came out of our quiz.

    It was the most amazing teal blue.
    Member #14 of SKI-ers club

    Words, words, they're all we have to go by!.

    (Pity they are mangled by this autocorrect!)
    • DigForVictory
    • By DigForVictory 19th Aug 19, 3:39 PM
    • 9,937 Posts
    • 34,144 Thanks
    DigForVictory
    Awww! Big fans of Totoro in this household so anecdote claimed that Mana Ashida, who played the young version of Mako Mori, was unable to pronounce Del Toro's name, so he allowed her to call him "Totoro-san."
    • DigForVictory
    • By DigForVictory 20th Aug 19, 7:13 AM
    • 9,937 Posts
    • 34,144 Thanks
    DigForVictory
    Son, contemplating the Viking longboat model he made for school, is considering it’s future & now plans to sell it in enay as a Viking funeral kit for a (small) family pet. Accelerant & any slave animals not included.
    He asked what heading to put it under....
    • DigForVictory
    • By DigForVictory 21st Aug 19, 3:41 PM
    • 9,937 Posts
    • 34,144 Thanks
    DigForVictory
    Just sat down with a pile of statements & Resolver.

    Blimey, it is easy to use!
    • quoia
    • By quoia 21st Aug 19, 6:15 PM
    • 13,285 Posts
    • 141,749 Thanks
    quoia
    Just sat down with a pile of statements & Resolver.

    Blimey, it is easy to use!
    Originally posted by DigForVictory
    Had to do a double-take there ....

    "Just sat down with a pile of statements" (BANK I'm thinking)

    and a REVOLVER GULP !!!

    Glad it's not that bad
    There are 10 types of people in the world. ()
    () Those that understand binary and those that do not!


    Veni, Vidi, VISA ! ................. I came, I saw, I PURCHASED
    (11)A104.28S94.98O112.46N86.73D101.02(12)J130.63F126.76M134.38A200.98M156.30J95.56J102.85A175.93
    S LOWER CASE OMEGA;6.59 so far ..
    • duncanthedog
    • By duncanthedog 23rd Aug 19, 8:21 AM
    • 617 Posts
    • 1,412 Thanks
    duncanthedog
    How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?

    These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

    ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
    WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
    ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
    WITNESS: My name is Susan!
    _______________________________
    ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
    WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
    ____________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
    WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
    ____________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
    WITNESS: July 18th.
    ATTORNEY: What year?
    WITNESS: Every year.
    _____________________________________
    ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
    WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
    ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
    WITNESS: Forty-five years.
    _________________________________
    ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
    WITNESS: Yes.
    ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
    WITNESS: I forget..
    ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
    ___________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
    WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
    ____________________________________

    ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
    WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ.
    ___________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
    WITNESS: Are you kidding me?
    _________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
    WITNESS: Yes.
    ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
    WITNESS: Getting laid
    ____________________________________________

    ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
    WITNESS: Yes.
    ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
    WITNESS: None.
    ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
    WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
    ____________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
    WITNESS: By death..
    ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
    WITNESS: Take a guess.
    ___________________________________________

    ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
    WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
    ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
    WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
    _____________________________________
    ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
    WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
    ______________________________________
    ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
    WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
    _________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
    WITNESS: Oral...
    _________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
    WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
    ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
    WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
    ____________________________________________
    ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
    WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
    ______________________________________
    And last:
    ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
    WITNESS: No.
    ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
    WITNESS: No.
    ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
    WITNESS: No..
    ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
    WITNESS: No.
    ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
    WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
    ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
    WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
    ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
    WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.#
    • quoia
    • By quoia 25th Aug 19, 3:42 PM
    • 13,285 Posts
    • 141,749 Thanks
    quoia
    Stokes and Leach - 76 partnership ...

    ...with Leach scoring just 1 in an hour off 17 balls ....


    ... together giving England the win ...

    ... making history in the process by succeeding with the highest English run chase of all time
    There are 10 types of people in the world. ()
    () Those that understand binary and those that do not!


    Veni, Vidi, VISA ! ................. I came, I saw, I PURCHASED
    (11)A104.28S94.98O112.46N86.73D101.02(12)J130.63F126.76M134.38A200.98M156.30J95.56J102.85A175.93
    S LOWER CASE OMEGA;6.59 so far ..
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