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    • MSE Steve
    • By MSE Steve 12th Mar 19, 6:03 PM
    • 77Posts
    • 29Thanks
    MSE Steve
    Money Moral Dilemma: Should I tell my friend he's underpaid me?
    • #1
    • 12th Mar 19, 6:03 PM
    Money Moral Dilemma: Should I tell my friend he's underpaid me? 12th Mar 19 at 6:03 PM
    This week's MoneySaver who wants advice asks...

    I often buy gig tickets for my friend and he pays me back, but not always the full amount. Eg, he gave me £25 for a £28 ticket. I wouldn't mind if it was a one-off, but it's happened a few times now. Should I say something?

    Unfortunately the MSE team can't always answer Money Moral Dilemma questions as contributions are often emailed in or suggested in person. They are intended to be enjoyed as a point of debate and discussed at face value.

    If you havenít already, join the forum to reply.

    Got a money moral dilemma of your own? Suggest an MMD.
    This Forum tip was included in MoneySavingExpert.com's weekly email!
Page 1
    • Skibunny40
    • By Skibunny40 12th Mar 19, 6:19 PM
    • 197 Posts
    • 218 Thanks
    Skibunny40
    • #2
    • 12th Mar 19, 6:19 PM
    • #2
    • 12th Mar 19, 6:19 PM
    Umm, yes.... he gives you £25 & you say, "actually it's £28, see where it says £28 on the ticket"...really not a dilemma
    • Minky
    • By Minky 12th Mar 19, 8:14 PM
    • 70 Posts
    • 31 Thanks
    Minky
    • #3
    • 12th Mar 19, 8:14 PM
    • #3
    • 12th Mar 19, 8:14 PM
    This happened to me alot of the time as i organise most of the events out. I now use the Splitwise app and my friends all have it too now so there is always a running...and correct...total of what they owe me. If they only pay £25 it will still show the £3 as outstanding and the app reminds them rather than me being uncomfortable having to chase it.
    • marich
    • By marich 12th Mar 19, 10:06 PM
    • 121 Posts
    • 149 Thanks
    marich
    • #4
    • 12th Mar 19, 10:06 PM
    Doh !
    • #4
    • 12th Mar 19, 10:06 PM
    So why are you asking the question ?


    Perhaps your friend has seen your lack of self-confidence and inability to assert yourself - is it really that he wants cheap tickets ?


    Get real . Either tell him he owes or carry on resenting him - what kind of a 'friend' is that - and what kind of relationship do you really have with him ?


    Ask yourself - where is the balance of power between you ?
    • REJP
    • By REJP 12th Mar 19, 10:10 PM
    • 88 Posts
    • 94 Thanks
    REJP
    • #5
    • 12th Mar 19, 10:10 PM
    • #5
    • 12th Mar 19, 10:10 PM
    I agree with those who say this is not a dilemma.
    Show him the price on the ticket or receipt and ask for the right money.
    If that breaks your friendship he was not a real friend anyway.
    Who really dreamed up this question ?
    • gloriouslyhappy
    • By gloriouslyhappy 12th Mar 19, 10:48 PM
    • 414 Posts
    • 851 Thanks
    gloriouslyhappy
    • #6
    • 12th Mar 19, 10:48 PM
    • #6
    • 12th Mar 19, 10:48 PM
    This happened to me alot of the time as i organise most of the events out. I now use the Splitwise app and my friends all have it too now so there is always a running...and correct...total of what they owe me. If they only pay £25 it will still show the £3 as outstanding and the app reminds them rather than me being uncomfortable having to chase it.
    Originally posted by Minky
    Thanks, I didn't know about Splitwise, I'm about to do some group bookings so will look into this.
    • lemonreptile
    • By lemonreptile 13th Mar 19, 5:30 AM
    • 36 Posts
    • 30 Thanks
    lemonreptile
    • #7
    • 13th Mar 19, 5:30 AM
    No-Brainer
    • #7
    • 13th Mar 19, 5:30 AM
    Just tell him straight. Your friend is taking the pi$$
    • VoucherMan
    • By VoucherMan 13th Mar 19, 5:30 AM
    • 2,588 Posts
    • 5,099 Thanks
    VoucherMan
    • #8
    • 13th Mar 19, 5:30 AM
    • #8
    • 13th Mar 19, 5:30 AM
    And if the guy doen't like messing with small change, no problem, just tell him that you'll happily accept a round £30 for the ticket.


    Better still, ask him to pay in advance.
    • Dean000000
    • By Dean000000 13th Mar 19, 5:46 AM
    • 600 Posts
    • 603 Thanks
    Dean000000
    • #9
    • 13th Mar 19, 5:46 AM
    • #9
    • 13th Mar 19, 5:46 AM
    Or just tell him....it’s £28 quid you scheister....so the first pint is on you....

    With a smile...

    Don’t get why everyone gets so irate about £3 here if there with friends....

    Balence it off with other stuff in jest...

    Kebabs on you tonight Steve....
    • John Gray
    • By John Gray 13th Mar 19, 6:23 AM
    • 5,430 Posts
    • 3,222 Thanks
    John Gray
    Just tell him straight. Your friend is taking the pi$$
    Originally posted by lemonreptile
    Surely he is taking the pi££ ?
    • pollypenny
    • By pollypenny 13th Mar 19, 7:36 AM
    • 26,055 Posts
    • 68,938 Thanks
    pollypenny
    Was the extra £3 a booking fee that's not printed on ticket so easily overlooked?

    Just remind him.
    Member #14 of SKI-ers club

    Words, words, they're all we have to go by!.

    (Pity they are mangled by this autocorrect!)
    • happyinflorida
    • By happyinflorida 13th Mar 19, 8:30 AM
    • 766 Posts
    • 657 Thanks
    happyinflorida
    Why are you buying the tickets repeatedly when your friend isn't paying you back?!

    I wouldn't have done it again after the first time, tell him to pay up immediately and stop underpaying as you're fed up with it and don't consider that a thing a real friend would do!
    • tallgirld
    • By tallgirld 13th Mar 19, 9:13 AM
    • 481 Posts
    • 321 Thanks
    tallgirld
    Yep! Just say
    "Thanks for the £25 but not sure if you realise it was actually £28 and this isn't the first time you have short changed me"

    Alternatively say nothing and never buy tickets for them again. Simple
    • BethP
    • By BethP 13th Mar 19, 10:02 AM
    • 11 Posts
    • 7 Thanks
    BethP
    Cheeky git!
    So your ďfriendĒ has underpaid you by £3.00?
    Was there a P&P charge as well?
    If so, split the P&P between you and next time you buy gig tickets for him/her, add the underpaid £3.00!

    Btw I like the app mentioned elsewhere on this thread where the app reminds pals of the amount they owe the organiser
    • Hoveactually
    • By Hoveactually 13th Mar 19, 10:32 AM
    • 2 Posts
    • 3 Thanks
    Hoveactually
    He knows!

    Cut him loose, he is not your friend.
    • Paul_DNAP
    • By Paul_DNAP 13th Mar 19, 11:14 AM
    • 509 Posts
    • 630 Thanks
    Paul_DNAP
    He knows!

    Cut him loose, he is not your friend.
    Originally posted by Hoveactually

    Bit harsh. I'd go for politely reminding him of the actual price whenever he makes a payment. If he kicks up a fuss, then yeah, but him loose.
    (Although I could be wrong, I often am.)
    • Ageing hippy
    • By Ageing hippy 13th Mar 19, 1:49 PM
    • 7 Posts
    • 5 Thanks
    Ageing hippy
    I suspect as someone else said, itís probably booking fee and postage and heís just giving you ticket face value. I think you need to tell him but ideally at the time.
    • rumblestiltskin
    • By rumblestiltskin 13th Mar 19, 1:56 PM
    • 4 Posts
    • 0 Thanks
    rumblestiltskin
    Actually, it isn't £, that is L.
    It IS $, which stands for Spain or Spanish.
    • shortcrust
    • By shortcrust 13th Mar 19, 5:04 PM
    • 2,319 Posts
    • 3,638 Thanks
    shortcrust
    Some folk just can’t help themselves. I know people who’d do this and would make you feel really rubbish if you asked for the remaining 3 quid. They’d probably bring it up quite often - “Oh make sure you give Shortcrust the right amount! Be a tragedy if it was three pounds short. Only kidding! You take things so seriously...!”

    Hmmm. I minimise my contact with them. Primarily for their safety and my liberty.
    • crmism
    • By crmism 14th Mar 19, 3:37 PM
    • 153 Posts
    • 85 Thanks
    crmism
    Tickets
    There's no reason why you should be left out of pocket, so as your friend is clearly sponging on you, don't say anything - do something instead, such as paying only for your tickets, leaving your friend to get his own.

    Another option is available if you don't like the thought of that. Simply ask your friend for the right money plus, say, 20% to allow for last-minute changes to the price, and make sure you get it before you order his or her ticket.

    That way, you should recover the shortfalls.
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