Money Moral Dilemma: How much should we charge our daughter for living with us?

What are her plans for the money that she's now saving since she moved home?

If the plan is to save for a deposit so she can buy somewhere, then charge her market rate and save that money for her in a bank account that she can't have access to. Get a decent savings rate or a regular saver account and put the money in there every month so that it builds up for her. Or invest it in a LISA so that the savings are tax free and she can get the government bonus when she comes to buy somewhere. If things are tight for her, then give a 10-15% discount on the rent or make it so that she's not just saving and can have a life as well - on £20k I'd charge around £90 a week.

If the plan is that she has no plan, no idea what to do with the money, isn't saving for anything then charge her market rate or close to it. Put the money into your bank account and save for yourself. If she can't afford market rate (which would be surprising - she has to pay to live somewhere) then charge her £105 a week.

Someone has to pay for her living expenses, and I don't see why it should be the parent when the child earns £20k

When my children started work, over 30 years ago, we negotiated that whatever they earned, gross per year, we should divide by 100, and that was the amount they should pay each month.


So when my children earned, say, £3000 a year, they paid £30 a month. As the salary equated to about £60 a week, and they had to pay tax, NI and fares, we felt that about £7.50 a week was more than fair. This amount covered meals, packed lunches, laundry etc, plus providing meals, and accommodation, for their frequent friends!


When they had an increase, the amount they paid increased accordingly. So if someone is earning today £20000 a year, then £200 a month would be the amount they paid.


Incidentally, once my children had their own homes they realised what a bargain they'd had, but the idea of charging them for their keep was not to make a profit (some chance!), but to teach responsibility.

When I moved back with my mum after Uni, once I was earning we figured out our total household income, and then what percentage of that income came from me. I paid that percentage of the shared costs. I don't remember exactly how much it was, but now I'm living with my girlfriend we do the same, her income is 25% of our total income, so she pays 25% on every shared cost.

Works out for me as it's a nice sliding scale based on who's earning what. If I earn more, I pay more, she pays less. When she's fully qualified and earning, we'll be paying almost 50/50. In future if she gets promoted and earns more than me, she'll be paying more.

Also, all the people being all "how can you act like a landlord to your child!". Eurgh. It's only fair now she's earning that she pays towards the costs of keeping her fed and warm. If you try and protect your child from everything out of "love" (including bills) they won't become very independent. Living on her own paying her own way will be a massive shock and she'll probably end up in debt at first, not knowing how to handle her money.

Of course she's not keen! I wouldn't be keen either


I used to pay £40 a month then made a massive fuss and it was reduced to £25. (this was years ago though).


When I think about it now I was taking the mick!!!


My mum was the best!!!!

I don't think a percentage of her income is reasonable. You don't pay rent, utilities or other bills as a percentage of income. The fairest way is to work out the extra costs incurred and to charge a fair rate for the room(s) she uses for herself.