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    Former MSE Penelope
    Real life MMD: Too late to claim for wedding cheque?
    • #1
    • 10th Jan 11, 11:42 AM
    Real life MMD: Too late to claim for wedding cheque? 10th Jan 11 at 11:42 AM
    Please give this MoneySaver the benefit of your advice...

    Too late to claim for wedding cheque?

    I got married 3 years ago, and a friend of mine gave me 200 for a wedding present. When we came back from honeymoon we had 200 missing from our wedding money which we couldn't find, so we wrote it off as 'lost'. Yesterday I flicked through my Pay-In book and found my friend's cheque. Obviously it's no longer valid and my friend never said anything at the time. Should I ask for another cheque?

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    Last edited by Former MSE Penelope; 11-01-2011 at 4:08 PM.
Page 1
  • mayling03
    • #2
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:48 PM
    • #2
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:48 PM
    This is a tricky one, how 'close' are you to this friend? And do you know of her financial situation? 200 is a lot of money! If you can forgo the embarrassment then go ahead.
  • Dragon Mummy
    • #3
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:53 PM
    • #3
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:53 PM
    Wow, 200 is a lot of money, this must be quite a good friend. Its a tricky one. I would probably leave it to be honest after all this time. Your friends circumstances may not be the same and they may not be able to afford that now. Its up to you but it could make your friendship a bit awkward if you ask for it.
  • flush_the_hamster
    • #4
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:54 PM
    • #4
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:54 PM
    you were able to write it off for 3 years, so I'd tear up the cheque. Their personal circumstances may have changed by now - Personally I'd just let it go (& no, i'm not minted).

    I wouldn't even contemplate inviting them round to an event and casually leave the cheque around where it could be found & therefore becomes a way to approach the subject- would be very cheeky - and could damage your relationship with them, all for the sake of money.
    Don't tell them your name, Pike!
    • whitewing
    • By whitewing 11th Jan 11, 8:57 PM
    • 11,541 Posts
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    • #5
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:57 PM
    • #5
    • 11th Jan 11, 8:57 PM
    No, tear it up and remember your friend's generosity anyway.
    When you find people who not only tolerate your quirks but celebrate them with glad cries of "Me too!" be sure to cherish them. Because these weirdos are your true family.
    • scotsbob
    • By scotsbob 11th Jan 11, 9:04 PM
    • 4,462 Posts
    • 6,958 Thanks
    • #6
    • 11th Jan 11, 9:04 PM
    • #6
    • 11th Jan 11, 9:04 PM
    For 3 years the money has stayed in their account rather than yours and they will have gained interest on it.

    Remind them of the wonderful time they had at your wedding then ask them for the 200 plus interest.
    • Star
    • By Star 11th Jan 11, 9:09 PM
    • 560 Posts
    • 239 Thanks
    • #7
    • 11th Jan 11, 9:09 PM
    • #7
    • 11th Jan 11, 9:09 PM
    No I wouldn't ask for another cheque, it's your fault for not taking care of it in the first place and paying it in a timely manner. They might not even be aware it wasn't cashed, as not everybody keeps that close an eye on their bank accounts.
    • Petlamb
    • By Petlamb 11th Jan 11, 10:25 PM
    • 872 Posts
    • 2,876 Thanks
    • #8
    • 11th Jan 11, 10:25 PM
    • #8
    • 11th Jan 11, 10:25 PM
    I don't think I would ask for it, but provided you're still close, I might share the tale of daftness with them (they gave it, so I'd want them to know why it wasn't cashed - rather than read anything into it?)... but make sure they understood I wasn't hinting!
    On the up
    Our wedding day! 13/06/15
  • faerie_girl
    • #9
    • 11th Jan 11, 10:39 PM
    • #9
    • 11th Jan 11, 10:39 PM
    I wouldn't ask direct but next time you see them you've found the check. Have a bit of a laugh about it. You never know they may write you another one out.
  • bogwart
    A gap of three years is far too long, in my opinion. Did you write and thank people for their gifts at the time? You should have realised then. I can't see any good coming from a request from you to provide a fresh cheque, and as for asking for the 200 plus interest I wouldn't consider for a second going there.
  • purplegaily
    Ouch - what a lot to lose, but way too late to ask for another cheque.

    I think it'd be time for a joke over a beer sometime down the line - but strictly along the lines that you don't expect the money.

    The economy was in such a different place then to where it is now, so unless said friend has won the lotto in the interim, not going there would be your best bet.
    Last edited by purplegaily; 11-01-2011 at 10:51 PM. Reason: spelling
    Always on the look out for a bargain. Thanks if you've helped me bag one.
  • reformedEffortmaker
    IMO, it's way too late to ask for it back. Sorry :-(
  • nickinoo
    I don't even think you should mention it, you could put your friend in an awkward position. Had you realised your error at the time then it would have been acceptable to ask for another cheque but not after 3 years.
    • MrsWassire
    • By MrsWassire 11th Jan 11, 11:17 PM
    • 200 Posts
    • 1,516 Thanks
    I'd send it back with a nice thank you card, telling them the story and that you greatly appreciate their generosity and thought they should have it back so they could shred it etc. That way, if they still want to give you the money it opens the door but without a hint of you asking for it.
    *Insert interesting words here*
    • Cade Foster
    • By Cade Foster 11th Jan 11, 11:25 PM
    • 162 Posts
    • 100 Thanks
    Cade Foster
    For 3 years the money has stayed in their account rather than yours and they will have gained interest on it.

    Remind them of the wonderful time they had at your wedding then ask them for the 200 plus interest.
    Originally posted by scotsbob
    Asking for money plus interest, I would tell you where to go, The Orignal questioner should just write if off as i they forgot about it that easy they can afford to write it off
  • FelinePrincess
    No, you should not ask for another one, or even mention it in my opinion. They probably thought you chose against cashing the cheque as you thought it was too much or something. They might no longer have 200 to spare.
    • annie-c
    • By annie-c 11th Jan 11, 11:28 PM
    • 2,517 Posts
    • 3,130 Thanks
    After 3 years? Let it go! It was a gift, not a right. You didn't cash it then, the financial situation is completely different now.

    Let it go, friendship is worth far more than money!
    • VT82
    • By VT82 11th Jan 11, 11:37 PM
    • 1,011 Posts
    • 854 Thanks
    Forget about it. You've managed without it for this long.
  • elliep
    Let it go, 3 years is a long time and the gift giver will have forgotten about it long ago.
    If the money would make a big difference to you and you think they can still afford it then maybe try mentioning that you found the uncashed cheque recently and that you can't believe you managed to misplace it at the time. Then see what your friend says, if they offer another cheque then graciously accept but if they don't just thank them for the kind intentions at the time, assure them you didn't mean any offence by not paying it in, and forget about it.
    Cross Stitch UFO club member 18.
    • Talent
    • By Talent 12th Jan 11, 1:01 AM
    • 244 Posts
    • 219 Thanks
    No, let it go. I presume you wrote and thanked them at the time? And, you don't need it do you.... really? Keep it as a souvenier, well out of sight!
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