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  • FIRST POST
    • kezlou
    • By kezlou 8th Oct 10, 9:01 AM
    • 3,280Posts
    • 43,067Thanks
    kezlou
    Its tough, it will get better and guess what its freezing brrrrr!
    • #1
    • 8th Oct 10, 9:01 AM
    Its tough, it will get better and guess what its freezing brrrrr! 8th Oct 10 at 9:01 AM
    I know this is naughty as the previous thread has been closed due to issues etc.

    But please could we still have a thread open, i'm not sure about other people, but for me it really helped me out. When feeling really down due to personal / financial problems being able to speak to other people who were in the same situation as myself really helped me to carry on and get through everything.

    The amount of assistance i personally received was amazing from cheap food bargain, clothes, growing veg and just general support etc

    So if it would be possible could the thread be either reopened or just another one started. I don't really like the arms as it can be quite nasty. I'd rather stay on the old style, as i feel i've gotten to know various posters, would hate to lose that.

    If not well please could one of the moderators please delete the thread.

    Thanks

    kezlou x
    sorry all the phone went and peeps turned up so i'll add the info now.

    This is a follow-on thread to Kittie's "It's tough NOW - so how are we coping?" thread.

    Kittie started up that "installment" of her thread in November 2008 - because the original one had had 235,000 views and she felt the need for a change of emphasis.


    That thread has now been running for some time - and has had over half a million views and BigMummaF suggested (and has been seconded) that perhaps it's time to start up the next "installment" of this popular thread.


    As Kittie is the "founder" of this thread - I have sent her a P.M. yesterday asking for her views on starting up a new installment. I know she has been on MSE since then - so will have seen the PM - but does not tend to frequent the Old Style Board now. The need for this thread is greater than ever now - as it looks like the Hard Times are "bedding in" for a while yet...


    So - kittie - if I may take the liberty of starting this new installment of your popular thread up on your behalf - as I know you feel we are much in accord in our way of thinking about the situation?


    So - kittie - if I may take silence as assent to my suggestion that I start up the Mark 3 Version of the "It is tough Now" thread on your behalf??


    - then here it is folks.


    So - perhaps folks would like to now start putting up their "Its tough now" posts on this new thread.


    EDIT: I've now put a post up on the previous thread to re-direct people over here.


    FURTHER EDIT (as per suggestion) - link to old thread here:
    cheers cat!!!
    Kitties earlier one from 2006
    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/...gs+get+tougher
    Kitties one from 2008
    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/....php?t=1295539


    Ceridwen from earlier in the year
    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=2597781

    Another edit i know but i had to do this:-

    Just to say EVERYONE is welcome to the join / visit the thread including OLD and new viewers!!!!!!!!




    This Forum Tip was included in MoneySavingExpert's weekly email

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    Last edited by kezlou; 22-10-2010 at 11:18 AM.
Page 223
  • ceridwen
    Wow, I am super-impressed! You'd better knit yourself up a superhero cape in your spare time too.

    I am feeling a bit better now, sitting here sniffling and smiling too thanks to you lot.

    I have rung Citizens Information (same as CAB I think) and they will help me fill the form. Just need to wait for a day I'm well enough to get out to them. And I have asked for advice from the ME groups. So far what I have heard is that it is not unusual to turn it down initially - it seems to be a sort of trial by fire.


    It has made me realise that I've been kind of pretending to be ok - not sure if I was just in denial - and this had made me realise I'm really not and I need to get better at asking for help. Just talked to my sister who was actually sweet and wonderful - I had been scared she would judge me.

    .
    Originally posted by NualaBuala
    Glad you had that pleasant surprise as to how your sister would react - just goes to show....

    One can never quite know how other people will react and its sometimes not as we "predicted" to ourselves. I know I spent MANY years thinking"...and one of the reasons I have to be very careful not to have any accidental pregnancies is my parents will kill me first/ask questions later". Well - I never did have any pregnancies of any description ( in my case) - but I realised in latter years that their reaction would have been the total opposite of what I had thought. They would have headed for any child first and been so busy being pleased at being grandparents that "killing me" would have come low down the list.. I also misjudged them generally in thinking they didnt care about me - because they are just SO reserved/stiff upper lip in many ways - but I've come to realise that just because they dont do "gushy and fluffy" that doesnt mean they dont care.

    People often surprise us - for good or bad - in their reactions.

    REET - now as regards "trial by fire" - one thing I have learnt over the years is that the powers-that-be in Britain/and yep Southern Ireland too simply don't respond most of the time to an initial simple request/complaint. It still annoys me intensely that they dont - but this is how things work in this country I've realised. There is an unspoken "rule of thumb" that one request/moan is a whim or rant. They don't start taking requests/statements/complaints seriously and acting on them until they have been made at least twice.

    I think it must be some sort of unwritten rule in Britain - akin to the one that in some other countries you have to refuse something you are offered 3 (?) times before they believe that it really IS a refusal and accept it. The British rule is clearly "Ask or complain at least twice - or nothing will be done". Its an absolute PITA - but I've learnt that they dont understand that I personally work differently and only expect to ask/complain the once - so I grit teeth and ask/complain again and often "come up with the goods" the second time. I just keep at it if a second Ask still doesnt do the trick. Thats how things work in this country it seems - so best get on and put in that second Ask as soon as possible Nuala my lass.

    Take care.
  • katholicos
    howdi folks!

    Been without internet access all week but it is in the process of getting sorted now, so while it's working at the moment i thought i'd pop on here and catch up with you all. Hugs to all who have/are having a tough time of things right now (((hugs)))
    Grocery Challenge for October: 135/200


    NSD Challenge: October 0/14
  • ceridwen
    Feisty ladies (and warrior-goddesses) indeed! I am so lucky to have you all. Ceridwen ... have you considered hiring yourself out as a professional lifter-of-spirits? Could be a nice little side-line.



    What has started off as a nightmare has ended with me counting my blessings and overflowing with gratitude because of how kind everyone is.
    Originally posted by NualaBuala
    Professional lifter-of-spirits????? Moi..... Hm....more of a "I know when a bit of !!! needs kicking and I'm quite prepared to kick it if I have to" sorta person..... I'm a fighter my lass - and thats what I was hoping you would do - and I see you have decided to
    • catznine
    • By catznine 10th Dec 10, 6:20 PM
    • 3,187 Posts
    • 24,544 Thanks
    catznine
    Catz, [/B]that is one of the loveliest things anyone has ever said about me ... major boost, thank you!!! You poor love, hope your chest is better soon. Take good care and enjoy those yummy muffins.
    by NualaBuala;39251416

    [B
    All true my dear! Often when I post I feel invisible and not part of things iykwim but you always notice and are lovely! You deserve a much better lot in life and I hope with all my heart that it comes right for you!

    Indeed the muffins were very yummy especially while still warm! Mmmmmm! In fact I will put the recipe up just in case anyone wants to try it. Can't remember where I got it (could be here) but am so grateful as they are lovely and freeze very well!

    Fool proof muffins

    Pre-heat the oven to 200C
    Dry ingredients:
    275g plain flour
    2 teaspoons baking powder
    100g sugar

    Wet ingredients:
    240ml milk
    90ml vegetable oil
    1 egg, beaten

    It doesn't really matter what sugar you use. You may wish to substitute some orange juice for the milk if it seems to suit the recipe (this makes lighter muffins but they don't seem to keep so long). You could use melted butter instead of the oil.

    Muffins are made by mixing the dry ingredients in one bowl, the wet in another (or a jug) and then adding the wet to the dry - mix until there is no dry flour left, but that is all.

    But before we mix - we need some flavour!

    For Double Chocolate muffins, substitute 30g of the flour for 30g cocoa powder. Then add 100g chopped chocolate to the Dry ingredients - or for Chocolate Cherry muffins add 50g of chopped cherries.

    For Apple muffins add a teaspoon of cinnamon to the Dry ingredients, and 2 chopped apples (skin on is fine) to the Wet, and a handful of sultanas if you like. Top with brown sugar for extra sweet crunch.

    For Banana and Chocolate add 100g chopped chocolate to the Dry, and 3 small bananas, mashed, to the Wet. (The most heavenly smell ever when they are cooking!)

    Add a good handful of fresh berries like blueberries to the wet ingredients, along with a splash of vanilla, for summery berry muffins.

    For healthy breakfast muffins (healthier, anyway!) add 50g oatbran to the Dry bowl, and a couple of tablespoons of honey to the Wet. When the muffins are still warm, drizzle more honey on top.

    Once you've decided on a flavour - combine the 2 bowlfuls as directed above. Only gentle but firm mixing is required. A lumpy-ish batter is produced, which you then scrape into 12 paper cases in a muffin tray, and bake for approx 20 minutes at 200C. (Until golden on top and a sharp knife stuck into a muffin comes out clean.) Allow to cool on a wire rack - if you can bear to!

    Easy to make, cheaper than many shop bought alternatives (depending on the choice of ingredients) and not full of yucky additives.

    If not all gobbled in the first few minutes, muffins keep well for several days in an airtight container. They can also be frozen, and if put in a lunchbox in the morning, they will be defrosted in time for lunch

    Catz x
    Last edited by catznine; 11-12-2010 at 8:18 AM.
    Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our heart rather than a piece of our mind.

    Jan grocery challenge 35.77/120
  • Dee5565
    NualaBuala;
    I am so pleased you have decided to appeal, will keep my fingers crossed for you.
    Take Care Dee
    DEALING WITH MY DEBTS ONE AT A TIME
    10 a day challenge for Aug 48.35 / 310
    NSD August 6/14

    • bluebag
    • By bluebag 10th Dec 10, 6:37 PM
    • 2,402 Posts
    • 23,311 Thanks
    bluebag
    Nuala Buala,

    so sorry to hear of your difficulties, keep your chin up. It's probably going to be a bit of a slog as these things go.

    It's awful to have to deal with it as well as having to cope with being ill.
    • Lindy - Loo
    • By Lindy - Loo 10th Dec 10, 6:43 PM
    • 800 Posts
    • 8,403 Thanks
    Lindy - Loo
    What a lovely gesture - if they don't actually need anything physical, is there an activity they may like - cinema trip and pizza/bowling/wet and wild/theatre/pantomime etc. that way they get something from their godparents that they can thank them for, and you haven't added any clutter!
    Originally posted by ubamother
    Thats a great idea, will have a chat with OH when hes down from putting the boys asleep - thanks x
    Mum, wife and dinnerlady!
    • Nargleblast
    • By Nargleblast 10th Dec 10, 6:53 PM
    • 9,421 Posts
    • 61,139 Thanks
    Nargleblast
    Just thought I would de-lurk and add another message of support for Nuala - yesterday you were upset and demoralised. Today you are angry and determined - good! And it's great that your sister is on side in this - as nice as people on here can be, it still helps to have support from people in your other life!

    I would suggest you start researching ME if you haven't done so already. You need to arm yourself with evidence that this condition does exist, evidence from your GP that you have got it, and evidence that it does impact on a person's ability to function (sister can probably help dig up info on those days you haven't got the energy). Then when the jobsworths start trying to knock back your claim you can bombard them with proper documented facts and figures. You get nowt in this world without asking, and sometimes you have to keep on and on and on asking, bit like water wearing away a stone.

    You are in the right, they are in the wrong. You have paid taxes into the system, now you have rights to help under the same system. Go for it!
    One life - your life - live it!
    • Dippypud
    • By Dippypud 10th Dec 10, 7:51 PM
    • 1,815 Posts
    • 16,917 Thanks
    Dippypud
    NualaBuala, try this site for guidance and info, you don't have to join, but I did and it really helped to get the info together for my DS1s DLA claim.

    I know yours is not DLA, but they have advice on medicals and appeals for all Disability related claims, (ESA, IB).

    http://www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/employment-and-support-allowance

    Hope this helps
    C.R.A.P.R.O.L.L.Z # 40 spanner supervisor.
    No problem can withstand the assault of sustained thought.
    Only after the last tree has been cut down. Only after the last fish has been caught. Only after the last river has been poisoned. Only then will you realize that money cannot be eaten.
    "l! ily yant ranya nar vanw"
    • charlies-aunt
    • By charlies-aunt 10th Dec 10, 9:26 PM
    • 1,581 Posts
    • 13,511 Thanks
    charlies-aunt
    ....and now for something completely different...


    After months of worrying about whether or not I'd be kept on after November for a few more months in my present fixed term appointment .....worrying what we'd do when my time was up....worrying about how we'd pay the bills ..


    I have a new job! . . . and a new employer! . . . and its full time! . . . and its permanent!


    Whoooo! Thank You God Thats my Chistmas present sorted !
    The best things in life aren't things


    2017 Grocery challenge 110.00 per week/ 5720 a year






    • kidcat
    • By kidcat 10th Dec 10, 10:00 PM
    • 6,042 Posts
    • 73,181 Thanks
    kidcat
    Well done charlies aunt, its so good to hear the good news


  • Kitcaboodle

    I have a new job! . . . and a new employer! . . . and its full time! . . . and its permanent!
    Originally posted by charlies-aunt
    Congratulations!!!! That's excellent news!
    • muffin man 7
    • By muffin man 7 10th Dec 10, 11:52 PM
    • 742 Posts
    • 7,753 Thanks
    muffin man 7
    great news charlies aunt a good way to end the old year and start fresh for 2011 hope your good luck continues
    2nd purse challenge no0400 Sealed pot challenge ???? 2 trolley find not counting small coins till end year
  • youngmummy
    ....and now for something completely different...


    After months of worrying about whether or not I'd be kept on after November for a few more months in my present fixed term appointment .....worrying what we'd do when my time was up....worrying about how we'd pay the bills ..


    I have a new job! . . . and a new employer! . . . and its full time! . . . and its permanent!


    Whoooo! Thank You God Thats my Chistmas present sorted !
    Originally posted by charlies-aunt
    congrats .... and well done ... good luck xxx
    (#80 save 12k in 2015) aim 10,000
    make 10 a day in 2015 261/4000
    emergency fund aim 100/1000
    1 a day for xmas 2015 0/365
    NSD feb 0/16
    feb GC 0/120
  • Hardup Hester
    Great news Charlies Aunt.

    Never let success go to your head, never let failure go to your heart.
    • jamanda
    • By jamanda 11th Dec 10, 6:15 AM
    • 787 Posts
    • 8,096 Thanks
    jamanda
    ....and now for something completely different...


    After months of worrying about whether or not I'd be kept on after November for a few more months in my present fixed term appointment .....worrying what we'd do when my time was up....worrying about how we'd pay the bills ..


    I have a new job! . . . and a new employer! . . . and its full time! . . . and its permanent!


    Whoooo! Thank You God Thats my Chistmas present sorted !
    Originally posted by charlies-aunt

    Congratulations and well done. I've been in my new job for 7 weeks now and still can't believe it has happened.

    Good luck
  • ceridwen
    NualaBuala, try this site for guidance and info, you don't have to join, but I did and it really helped to get the info together for my DS1s DLA claim.

    I know yours is not DLA, but they have advice on medicals and appeals for all Disability related claims, (ESA, IB).

    http://www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/employment-and-support-allowance

    Hope this helps
    Originally posted by Dippypud
    That sounds like a good site to investigate. It is easy for the unwary to "fall into traps" - and I've avoided doing that myself wayback because I'd read the info/knew the ropes.
  • ceridwen
    ....and now for something completely different...


    After months of worrying about whether or not I'd be kept on after November for a few more months in my present fixed term appointment .....worrying what we'd do when my time was up....worrying about how we'd pay the bills ..


    I have a new job! . . . and a new employer! . . . and its full time! . . . and its permanent!


    Whoooo! Thank You God Thats my Chistmas present sorted !
    Originally posted by charlies-aunt
    Congratulations Thats a relief for you.
    • Mrs Veg Plot
    • By Mrs Veg Plot 11th Dec 10, 7:26 AM
    • 894 Posts
    • 11,501 Thanks
    Mrs Veg Plot
    Morning all

    Have not had chance to get on here since the beginning of the month so have lots of catching up to do. All of the snow has now gone and no ice either today. Did not get snowed in but felt really pleased that the freezer and cupboards were stocked up and I had alternative cooking methods should we loose power/gas. Just need to sort out another torch.

    Will try to catch up with everyones news today but will be dipping in and out as I am planning on getting the christmas shopping finished.
    • redlady_1
    • By redlady_1 11th Dec 10, 7:52 AM
    • 1,553 Posts
    • 13,774 Thanks
    redlady_1
    Catz - thanks for the muffin recipe. I may try those as they look quite plain and I am not a big sweet lover.

    Contrats to Charlies Aunt.

    I also have some news...as you know I have been renovating the whole house and yesterday the blokey came to quote for the cellar. He has done work for me before so I know I am not going to get another "carpenter!" The thing is he is really hard to pin down (I waited 3 months for him to plaster a wall) and he has said he can do the cellar next week!!! This means I need to find a significant amount of cash within 7 day and just before christmas, cash I dont have right now. Now one of my friends works abroad and has more money than you can shake a stick at, and has offered to lend me the money. He knows without a shadow of doubt I will pay it back asap. But I am torn. I have never borrowed from a friend before and it doesnt seem to be sitting too well (which is why I would throw every spare bit of cash at him) and am in two minds what to do. Do I finally have all the major works finished on the house? Or do I wait for another year or so for the builder to get his act together (at least a year) and I have saved up all the pennies?? I can borrow the money from a bank but he said why do that when you can pay me back interest free? There are also no strings attached (one thing I definitely checked out and we have been friends too long) to the loan of the money and I can repay it comfortably. I need to extra room and it would also mean I could then remortgage and get off this dreadful fixed rate of interest!

    Any advice would be appreciated.
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