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Advice needed with separating

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DeclanA94DeclanA94 Forumite
8 posts
First Post
MoneySaving Newbie
Hi there, just hoping someone can give me some advice with the situation I am in with my now ex partner.

Unfortunately the relationship has came to an end and the issue I have is the house is in both our names and I don’t want to sell it as I don’t want to disrupt our son even more. I could afford to buy her out but she is against that as she would rather I pay half the mortgage and move out as our son will be with her more often due to my shifts at work, and as she can’t afford to buy me out I’m really lost as what to do. I don’t want to uproot my sons whole life but I will have to move into my parents house as I won’t be able to buy anywhere else for sometime. My heads all over the place with the whole situation and I don’t know what to do.
any help is appreciated 


  • Comms69Comms69 Forumite
    12.9K posts
    10,000 Posts Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    There's a couple of ways to look at this.
    1. Ok you pay half the mortgage, but what happens to the property down the line? Technically she's getting full use for half the cost. So will that be covered when it sells, IE you get 65%, she gets 35%?
    2. What about new partners? Would you be paying if she had a second household income? Or would they then rent your share from you?
    3. Does anyone actually need to move out? Is there room for both of you to have a bedroom?

    Selling now is the simplest option. It's a clean break. 
  • DeclanA94DeclanA94 Forumite
    8 posts
    First Post
    MoneySaving Newbie
    Thanks for the help, I didn’t ask myself some of those questions so that’s given me some food for thought.
  • FireflyawayFireflyaway Forumite
    2.7K posts
    Fifth Anniversary 1,000 Posts
    Sorry to hear you are facing this. Could you move into a cheap flat or room in a shared house? Is your ex willing to pay the mortgage? I'd say it might be sensible to seek legal advice because if she stays there alone and pays the mortgage she might have more of a claim on the property later on? Could you afford to continue to pay half the mortgage and rent a small place for yourself?  You don't need to buy immediately. Things will change eventually once your son is an adult etc. At that point you could sell up and use the equity to buy. It might be a way off but chances are you will get more equity than you would now. 
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