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Embracing the new family dynamics and looking forward to the future with optimism

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
1K replies 237.1K views
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  • Savvy_sewingSavvy_sewing Forumite
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    Soft tissue damage to Dgds foot, a walking boot, and approximately 6 weeks to heal. We have been there before, but DGD has surprised me when two of her friends have come to call she has actually gone out with them with her crutches. Big relief from last time when she wouldn't venture out at all.

    DS and his GF have gone out for the day, they have plans for some virtual reality games somewhere in MK this evening.
    We are waiting for the other family to come to collect the boys but they are running late again.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Savvy_sewingSavvy_sewing Forumite
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    Collection just been, and a £5 extra so that's going in the 100 day challenge.
    I am not going to have much respite today as children are still with me. They are not impressed that the other nanny is late. Very late. 12-3 it was supposed to be. Then she changed 2-5
    And now it's 3.15pm so it's hardly going to be worth going at this rate.
    I was planning on doing a supermarket shop, but I think I will just make do now with what ever I have in the cupboards and do random meals for today and tomorrow and other than buying milk in the morning I will hang on until Monday. I want to relax not dash about a shop against the clock.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • supermezzosupermezzo Forumite
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    I really hope that you just took the boys shopping and let her stew if she turned up. As one who learnt this from a woefully inept 'Father', failing to turn up/be late/leave kids waiting teaches them that waiting and being disappointed is 'the norm'.

    That plus, eventually, they learn to resent both the party being late and the party sending them to see them.
    It aint over til I've done singing....
  • Savvy_sewingSavvy_sewing Forumite
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    supermezzo wrote: »
    I really hope that you just took the boys shopping and let her stew if she turned up. As one who learnt this from a woefully inept 'Father', failing to turn up/be late/leave kids waiting teaches them that waiting and being disappointed is 'the norm'.

    That plus, eventually, they learn to resent both the party being late and the party sending them to see them.

    I didn't this time, I waited etc but I will be discussing it in the next meeting. Before we go to court at the end of the month.
    I did at least get some down time.
    Eventually it was 3.30 and 7.30 before they were home

    I don't want to fall out with them but I am not impressed
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • pollyanna_26pollyanna_26 Forumite
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    Quick hello and wishig all here a good year ahead. My beloved Dell finally gave up the fight early in December. I've been pretty unbearable but refused to go into debt.


    Yesterday my youngest and her boyfriend handed me a laptop, it's not new but as an expert in all things IT he's sorted it out. They've been secretly searching for the perfect solution and refuse to take a penny calling it a late christmas present. I am so grateful to them both for a gift from the heart.


    I have a lot to catch up on but am glad dgd is able to go out with her friends this time. I hope you are logging the times you are being messed about re contact Ss. One thing I've wondered about is if dgs2 seems thirsty or hungry when he wakes for the bottle during the night. It reminds me of my son who did the same thing. It was a long time ago but it was usual back then to add baby cereal to one bottle if hunger was the reason. Health visitor advice. From your posts it seems little one does eat solids during the day so would a drink near his bed replace the bottle?


    Good to hear mum is steadily improving. Now keep your focus on your wellbeing. I hope things are resolved soon as and you are able to plan knowing exactly how things will be.
    Take care of you
    pollyx
    It is better to light a single candle than to curse the darkness.
  • pollyanna_26pollyanna_26 Forumite
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    I didn't this time, I waited etc but I will be discussing it in the next meeting. Before we go to court at the end of the month.
    I did at least get some down time.
    Eventually it was 3.30 and 7.30 before they were home

    I don't want to fall out with them but I am not impressed


    I missed your latest post while typing. No need to fall out with anyone. Just report these incidents stressing your time is given in many directions on a daily basis and it's wrong to be left sitting until contact turns up. Not just from your point of view but for the 2 little ones too. You can't establish a routine while it's disrupted by others. You're trying to give the little ones stability and that's not possible if they have to wait to see if they're going out or not. They can do without anxiety having known that in the past. Firm plans are needed by those in SS to enable contact to work properly.
    pollyx
    It is better to light a single candle than to curse the darkness.
  • Savvy_sewingSavvy_sewing Forumite
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    We are having a lazy day today.
    Usual early morning, but then Dgs2 has been back down for a sleep, so it's peaceful. Dgd had the play dough out with the boys while I had a customer come to collect the waistcoat I made her husband. She was very pleased with it, I hope he will be too.
    DS came in long enough to grab his gear and head for work, don't think dgs1 even blinked at him.
    I am concentrating on moving the washing on, and the drying ready for school etc tomorrow.
    I will have to work out how to get Dgd to and from school and dgs1 in the opposite direction before my car goes to the garage to try and sort out why it makes a noise in reverse.
    DS's car is waiting for his appointment to get it fixed on Tuesday.

    Possibly I will sort out some recycling this afternoon.

    Re contact I will be double checking with social when I get a chance. We still have not been allocated a new one since the other left before Christmas.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • Savvy_sewingSavvy_sewing Forumite
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    Time to move, dgs2 woke his usual multiple times, he's been in my room for about an hour now, flicking through cartoons on YouTube. As his speech is improving Google is less random and he is less frustrated!
    He can say hey google open YouTube quite clearly now, and of course props pig, and paw patrol are clear now, although the babble in between can be a bit hit and miss.
    My current account is teatering close to the overdraft, I shall really have to reign in my extra spending as I don't want to take anymore from the savings pot. Time to get the others up for school. I will have to drive Dgd to school.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
  • hb2hb2 Forumite
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    Polly, it's great to see you again, you have been missed!

    Ss, I hope you managed to solve the riddle of getting children to different parts of town at the same time!
  • edited 13 January at 8:15PM
    Savvy_sewingSavvy_sewing Forumite
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    edited 13 January at 8:15PM
    I have been on the go one way or another all day.
    Luckily dgs1 had breakfast club at 7.45 so he was sorted first, then back to take Dgd to school, drop the car at the garage. Walk back via the bank, forgot the Hill, I used to walk it every day. My thighs hurt by the time I got home.
    Into the cabin to replace complete pockets in a pair of trousers, a zip in some jeans and then make a dogs coat for our dotty designer. Just finished it in time to get the car.
    DS borrowed his gfs car, dropped me off and he collected dgs1, and I paid for my car and managed to get Dgd before meeting at home, putting the boys in my car off to see their Mum. While they were there Dgd and I did the Aldi shop, dropped my Mums stuff off and back with 4 minutes to spare to collect the boys. Home, shopping away and dinner is in the oven.
    Dgd wanted a McD, but I said nope we're cooking our own nuggets and chips.
    I realised that I missed dinner today.
    I have a headache and feel the tension in my shoulders at the moment.
    I look forward to my electric blanket to ease the stress away later.
    When I die I will know that I have lived, loved, mattered and made a difference, even if in a small way.
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