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Would you say something?

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
45 replies 5.7K views
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  • LadyDeeLadyDee Forumite
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    Who is she going to turn on? It's none of your business, stay out of it. If she was your sister I'd say confront him and tell him to 'fess up, otherwise keep quiet.
  • oystercatcheroystercatcher Forumite
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    +1 for keeping quiet.

    She will find out, or work it out in the end when the time is right. No point in interfering. Let the relationships run their natural course.
  • PollycatPollycat Forumite
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    Yes, I definitely would.

    This woman is quite impulsive, explosive though...

    She previously only heard rumours about this woman apparently having an affair with her boyfriend, confronted her and slapped her!

    I’m cautious in case she thinks I am stirring the pot... what if she doesn’t believe me? Should I dismiss this fear and tell her the truth so I at least know I’ve done my part in being honest?
    She's actually directing her anger at the wrong person.

    It's her boyfriend she should be angry with.
    It's he who is in a relationship with her.

    Although she shouldn't really be acting on rumours and she should definitely not be slapping anyone.
    If it was me she'd slapped she'd have bigger worries than her boyfriend possibly sleeping around.
    hazyjo wrote: »
    Wouldn't say anything.

    You say 'witnessed this' on Monday. Unless you caught them mid-shag, it does sound a bit gossipy to run straight to her or anyone. What actually did you see? Could it have been a kiss goodnight? Or an email? Or holding hands? Might not be an affair. I have been gossiped about for over 10 years as am close to a bloke at work - and we're certainly not having an affair.
    Have to say - I love this comment. :T
  • SystemSystem
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    Can you prove it...can you be sure she'll listen to you AND believe you? What will happen if she doesn't...


    It's cut and dry, you say nothing as it does not concern you. Sooner or later it'll be out in the open.
  • DigForVictoryDigForVictory Forumite
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    If he's fool enough to play around with a strong minded lass on company territory, he'll be toast shortly enough.

    Unless gossip isn't the company sport at yours as it is at ours?

    Besides, what you saw and didn't mention on Monday may well have been sighted & reported already and your decisive pal may have Bank Holiday Weekend plans the bloke knows nothing of. Yet. I'd stay quiet.
  • cheskychesky Forumite
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    But don't forget to practice your 'surprised and shocked' face when she tells you. Never let on you knew before.
  • PollycatPollycat Forumite
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    If he's fool enough to play around with a strong minded lass on company territory, he'll be toast shortly enough.

    Unless gossip isn't the company sport at yours as it is at ours?

    Besides, what you saw and didn't mention on Monday may well have been sighted & reported already and your decisive pal may have Bank Holiday Weekend plans the bloke knows nothing of. Yet. I'd stay quiet.
    Oh! :eek:

    Now you've gone and done it.

    I have a vision of boiling oil, lots of knives and maybe some vintage nutcrackers...;)
  • PrimrosePrimrose Forumite
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    how much is this playing on your conscience?
    Does the boyfriend know what you witnessed? If he does, you could tell him that you feel uncomfortable about it and whilst it,s none of your business, if he IS Playing a double game, you're asking him to sort out where his loyalties lit and do the right thing.

    You could point out to him that inadvertently causing potential embarrassment to uninvolved work colleagues by exposing them to decisions about disloyalty to another employee is not playing the game.

    However if he's innocent, then you risk the same degree of embarrassment and discomfort as if you'd spilled the beans to his girlfriend.
  • ska_loverska_lover Forumite
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    Lets get this straight - you witnessed him cheating on her

    YOU WITNESSED him cheating, what exactly did you see? Did you see kissing, hand holding, penetration? WHAT?

    If I was very VERY sure, yes I would always tell a person that they were being cheated on...but I have to again repeat, I would have to be very certain of what I knew, not what I thought I saw

    I do not understand people who keep quiet about this kind of stuff, it is someone elses LIFE not a plot on coronation street

    If you know he is cheating, do the right thing. It is the right thing to alert her and not stand by observing her waste her life on this fool - do not add to her humiliation by being one of those who stand back and watch, all the time knowing about it

    I would want to know if it was me
    The opposite of what you know...is also true
  • PasturesNewPasturesNew Forumite
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    Everybody shoots the messenger... so only do it for a BEST friend.
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