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Anyway to calm nerves in an interview?

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Anyway to calm nerves in an interview?

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Employment, Jobseeking & Training
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Housebuy12345Housebuy12345 Forumite
211 posts
edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Employment, Jobseeking & Training
I’ve started job hunting and had an interview today. I was a bag of nerves and I didn’t interview well. Although I would love to bring in bullet points to answer the usual questions, my social anxiety takes over and I become unable to speak properly, answer questions fully and walk away feeling bad.

I’ve had jobs so I may be internalizing the above, and I may not come across as bad as I think, but I’m also unable to keep my social anxiety at bay.

Feeling very sad today! I know I can do the job, it’s the actual getting of the job :(
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  • keepcalmandstayoutofdebtkeepcalmandstayoutofdebt Forumite
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    I wouldn't worry - a lot depends on the person/people doing the interview as well. Years ago I remember an interviewer playing the are you nervous card (like you get helpful people at the dentist commenting if you appear a nervy patient) and thought then it didn't serve to help anyone.

    Myself, personally I interview well and confidently, then I start the job and fall into this trap. (which is worse by the way) I prefer doing a half day trial after the interview and actually the time it happened it be offered, it made me think twice about the supposed dream role on offer, incredibly insightful.

    My Mum had interviews last week after a year break, she said her first was nervous and then her next was better.


  • jonnygee2jonnygee2 Forumite
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    my social anxiety takes over and I become unable to speak properly, answer questions fully and walk away feeling bad.

    Everyone gets nervous in interviews but this sounds a bit worse and actually inhibiting.

    Try looking up some basic CBT techniques, but I'd possibly also consider speaking to your GP about short term medication to help with performance anxiety of it continues to affect your chances of getting a job.
  • ^yes I have a beta blocker that lowers my heart rate and I should have taken it. I just didn’t realize how bad I would get. Surely other people get nervous?
  • Also the NHS is useless. It took me a year to get referred to my current psychologist and now I will start treatment in 18 months. Before that I was told I wasn’t eligible for treatment (I moved house).
  • Kentish_DaveKentish_Dave
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    Well, this won’t work for everyone, but...

    Many years ago when I was applying for graduate jobs I was aware of how critical it was to get offers. Getting on a good graduate course would probably be life changing, and the pressure made me come across quite badly.

    So, in the absence back then of mindfulness training, relaxation apps and the like I would call in the venue ahead of time to make sure that I had the right place, then find a local pub and have a single vodka and orange.

    For me a single did not make me drunk, but it did just calm me down enough that I could come across well.

    Nowadays it would not occur tomme to be nervous in an interview, I’ve a strong track record, a great reputation, and know that I will do fine, but I do wonder if I’d have made it here without that little helper all those years ago.
  • elsienelsien Forumite
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    ^yes I have a beta blocker that lowers my heart rate and I should have taken it. I just didn’t realize how bad I would get. Surely other people get nervous?

    Practice and more practice. I used to do my spiel out loud in front of friends and family which was horribly embarrassing but did mean that it was more likely to come rolling out when needed.
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
  • _shel_shel Forumite
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    Beta blockers as someone else mentioned or calms that you can buy in the chemist. They're herbal but relax you.

    Good luck,I'm exactly the same. Brill at applications but never get through the interview because I'm a quivering wreck and forget everything except my panic.
    Don't Buy The S*n
  • Gavin83Gavin83 Forumite
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    Personally (although I respect this won't work for most!) I have a red bull before any interviews. I find it helps make my mind a little more alert and sharp, which does help with the confidence and ironically helps me relax a bit. I've had comments before that I come across as extremely confident so it clearly works!

    I'd suggest making sure you're well prepared for an interview. You should be spending at least 10 hours preparing for an interview where you actually want the job. Walking in there confident you can answer the questions will help you relax.
  • Hi! Don't give up, you must have made a good application to get through to interview. Employers will expect everyone to be nervous at interview, but I appreciate it is harder when you have social anxiety.
    I'd also suggest trying to prepare for the next interview by looking at the company/organisation's website beforehand as it shows you are interested. Good luck and best wishes for the future!
  • jobbingmusicianjobbingmusician Forumite, Board Guide
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    I really really wouldn't recommend alcohol. Interviewers are not generally nose blind!

    Deep breathing does help - in fact even remembering to breathe helps!
    I'm the Board Guide on the Matched Betting; Referrers and Jobseeking & Training boards. I'm a volunteer to help the boards run smoothly, and I can move and merge posts there. Board guides are not moderators and don't read every post. If you spot an illegal or inappropriate post then please report it to [email protected] (it's not part of my role to deal with this). Any views are mine and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.com.

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