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My home is a mess

edited 3 May 2011 at 7:27PM in Old Style MoneySaving
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  • Emm-in-a-pickleEmm-in-a-pickle Forumite
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    Mothernerd, no wonder you feel down even though you know your mums rantings are unjustified, all the more reason to feel hurt. It is so unfair, but that doesn`t make it easier to deal with, does it?
    While you`re waiting for the GP appointment, take a look at what you have achieved, do a sort of `positives` stock-take. Have a smile at your laminate floors and enjoy the thought that they`ll be so much easier to keep clean.

    Re this thread stalling - I suppose it`s only natural, as Messy folks stall too. I certainly have! Every time I think I`m getting on top of something home & gardenwise, some other part is creeping back into chaos again. I no longer beat myself up about it, just every now and again think I`m winning and enjoy that when it happens.
    My DD`s situation helps put things into perspective, there are more important things in life than a tidy house!
  • edited 31 July 2016 at 8:33PM
    mothernerdmothernerd Forumite
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    edited 31 July 2016 at 8:33PM
    Absolutely agree with you Emm although that may be part of the problem. Living alone with three boys for so long certainly made me drop my standards but as DS2 once pointed out (he was about 10 at the time) 'It's our house/ home too'.

    My ex once said that I was the best mother he had ever met and also the worst housekeeper and that he didn't know anyone who had managed so successfully to separate the two roles. Don't think he meant it as a compliment but it's actually the nicest thing he ever said to me. I once read a book about a single parent who cleaned for a number of clients. She had names for each client including a teacher who's initial instructions were to keep the house "just above dysentery level" which is a philosophy I have some sympathy with. If the house is clean enough that no one gets sick, that's good enough. Overheard the nurses in A & e once complaining about children with no immune system as their mothers killed any hint of a germ and the poor kids had never been exposed to 'normal levels of dirt'. As Dara O'Braian always says, 'If you find some dirt in your kitchen the best thing you can do for your toddler is to wipe their face in it".

    Have had a lovely restful day today. I did so much walking yesterday that my ankles and knees were still wobbly at noon + dizziness has escalated. Got the 'duty' visit to mum over with so now have the whole week free.

    Think I have decided to have the skip. Paid double Council tax last time (I was unsure if there would be a delay or stoppage to my WTC - they have changed the rules for self-employed people) so I have enough in this month's budget without to cover the cost without reducing my planned savings. Committed myself by finding the relevant page in Yellow pages.

    Some of the things to go in the skip are over 20 years and most are around 12/13 years so a skip so probably the equivalent of a small load once a year for 15 years. Will feel so much better when it is gone. For many years I needed to keep things like this in case something needed repairing. Now I don't. I have a small emergency fund and if I have a clear space to work and think, I should be able to rebuild my business and bring in a modest income.

    Without the added clutter I can focus on what I need to tackle next.
    My mission in life is not only to survive,but to thrive and to do so with some Passion, some Compassion, some Humour and some Style.
    NST Feb No 6 No Debt No mortgage
  • pollypennypollypenny Forumite
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    No clearing out for me at the moment: I'm in the USA, where not a cup dare be out of place with DIL!

    DS has an operation tomorrow, a stray screw after three ACL ops. We are on duty as DIL has to travel.
    Member #14 of SKI-ers club

    Words, words, they're all we have to go by!.

    (Pity they are mangled by this autocorrect!)
  • Emm-in-a-pickleEmm-in-a-pickle Forumite
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    Hi Messies!

    Pol, you do get about! Hope your DS is doing well, and you`re enjoying the Granny-time.

    Mothernerd, I totally agree with you that there is danger in over-sanitising everything (not here, btw!). That, as well as the over-use of antibiotics, is why the so-called `superbugs` have evolved.

    My DD`s extended family are doing fine, the newcomers are enjoying their food, as she cooks from scratch and believes in breakfast, 2 things they haven`t been used to before - and they`re loving it! Also, like her own they are mucking in with chores and enjoying `helping`. (To varying degrees)

    I had a Stardrops` day today. Started with the cooker hob, and have wiped down/scrubbed everything else in the kitchen, my white-goods are white again! This was long overdue, and while I was at it I have done 3 WM loads, mostly towels and bedding (now I don`t have a big stash of spares it seemed like a good idea.)
    Last load just went on the line, the first 2 have dried nicely outside. I was going to do a bit of jungle clearing, but ended up just trampling down enough to access washing line. OH says not to worry, it`ll all die back in the autumn anyway.
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