Separated, how much should I provide?

edited 31 August 2016 at 12:26PM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
3.3K replies 590.7K views
178101213331

Replies

  • Emmylou_2Emmylou_2 Forumite
    1K Posts
    JackRS wrote: »
    <snip>

    She has requested child tax credit pack but can take 2 weeks? She has also inquired about child benefit for youngest (17)?

    <snip>

    Surely you/she already got child benefit for the youngest (ie before you split)?
    We may not have it all together, but together we have it all :beer:
    B&SC Member No 324

    Living with ME, fibromyalgia and (newly diagnosed but been there a long time) EDS Type 3 (Hypermobility). Woo hoo :rotfl:
  • JackRSJackRS Forumite
    1.1K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    ✭✭✭
    Emmylou wrote: »
    Surely you/she already got child benefit for the youngest (ie before you split)?


    No due to my salary we were not eligible, can’t remember what the threshold was but basically it’s designed for lower income families ,as it should be. However now she should be eligible?
    Regards

    JackRS
  • RASRAS Forumite
    29.9K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    JackRS wrote: »
    RAS wrote: »
    No she says as it's JSA you have to go and apply for jobs etc which is as it should be but because she is moving south in 3 months she doesn't think she'll be able to get benefit or a job for that length of time so basically doesn't think it's avialbale to her?

    Well she is a nightmare isn't she.

    Tell her to sign on urgently and apply for jobs where she lives now. Nothing to say she will get a job there (it usually take 6 months anyway) but she can always flunk the interviews. At this stage it is about 3 jobs a week that she would need to evidence.

    Gives her time to sort out her CV and get in some interview experience.

    And if she is moving south, can you not move back into the property instead of paying rent?
    The person who has not made a mistake, has made nothing
  • JackRSJackRS Forumite
    1.1K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    ✭✭✭
    RAS wrote: »
    How much child tax credit will she get (you can model this on the www.turn2us.org.uk web-site.

    So if the Council Tax is included in the Direct Debits, remove the sum in excess of the unemployed contribution immediately.

    I completed that online tool and got this result:

    Tax Credits = £115/wk
    Income support = £72/wk
    Council tax support = £32/wk
    Child Benefit = £32/wk
    Total £252/wk
    ~ £1000 a month potentially.

    However I can't seem to get her to progress these as she thinks no point for 3 months. I've previously sent her the links to this tool.
    Regards

    JackRS
  • RASRAS Forumite
    29.9K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    Is child benefit that high????

    So tell her that is what she is entitled to and that she has 2 weeks before you start to reduce the family income accordingly.
    The person who has not made a mistake, has made nothing
  • gizmo111gizmo111 Forumite
    2.6K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    ✭✭✭✭
    JackRS wrote: »
    I completed that online tool and got this result:

    Tax Credits = £115/wk
    Income support = £72/wk
    Council tax support = £32/wk
    Child Benefit = £32/wk
    Total £252/wk
    ~ £1000 a month potentially.

    However I can't seem to get her to progress these as she thinks no point for 3 months. I've previously sent her the links to this tool.

    And all this

    Household Direct debits £457
    2 Living allowance £543
    3 lease car £161
    4 children allowance £100
    5 Driving lessons £200

    Don't pay the living allowance - pay the kids direct £50 per month and pay the driving instructor less. How many lessons are they having for that amount of money.

    Sort out the bank account - stop the DD's and put them from a different account, expalin to the bank that you have split and they will freeze the account to stop her running an overdraft.
    Mama read so much about the dangers of drinking alcohol and eating chocolate that she immediately gave up reading.
  • JackRSJackRS Forumite
    1.1K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    ✭✭✭
    RAS wrote: »
    JackRS wrote: »

    Well she is a nightmare isn't she.

    Tell her to sign on urgently and apply for jobs where she lives now. Nothing to say she will get a job there (it usually take 6 months anyway) but she can always flunk the interviews. At this stage it is about 3 jobs a week that she would need to evidence.

    Gives her time to sort out her CV and get in some interview experience.

    And if she is moving south, can you not move back into the property instead of paying rent?

    She won't contemplate that as obviously she's done nothing wrong it's mychoices that has changed her circumstances but yeah basically that is what I'm suggesting she does. I think maybe she's been advised to stick it out as muggins here is too soft. I want to review the options together and decide best action I am trying to be reasonable under the circumstances but feel whatever I do I'll be considered nasty.

    We're planning to sell the property as she'll need capital for new places which she suggests she should have more than 50% becasue earning capacity is less so we've got that joy to come! Yes I will move back in if she moves out and not sold.
    Regards

    JackRS
  • gizmo111gizmo111 Forumite
    2.6K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    ✭✭✭✭
    JackRS wrote: »
    RAS wrote: »

    She won't contemplate that as obviously she's done nothing wrong it's mychoices that has changed her circumstances but yeah basically that is what I'm suggesting she does. I think maybe she's been advised to stick it out as muggins here is too soft. I want to review the options together and decide best action I am trying to be reasonable under the circumstances but feel whatever I do I'll be considered nasty.

    We're planning to sell the property as she'll need capital for new places which she suggests she should have more than 50% becasue earning capacity is less so we've got that joy to come! Yes I will move back in if she moves out and not sold.

    its not about blame its about taking responsibility.
    You are being far too generous and that's why she won't budge, you're giving a choice to carry on like this.
    Mama read so much about the dangers of drinking alcohol and eating chocolate that she immediately gave up reading.
  • JackRSJackRS Forumite
    1.1K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    ✭✭✭
    gizmo111 wrote: »
    And all this

    Household Direct debits £457
    2 Living allowance £543
    3 lease car £161
    4 children allowance £100
    5 Driving lessons £200

    Don't pay the living allowance - pay the kids direct £50 per month and pay the driving instructor less. How many lessons are they having for that amount of money.

    Sort out the bank account - stop the DD's and put them from a different account, expalin to the bank that you have split and they will freeze the account to stop her running an overdraft.

    Yeah paying kids direct. Driving lessons are £25/hour. So one has an hour a week the other 1.5 hours but has text end of month. I was thinking of just transfering joint account into her name.
    What's complicating it is because she’s moving south etc she thinks we shouldn’t change anything.
    Regards

    JackRS
  • zzzLazyDaisyzzzLazyDaisy Forumite
    12.5K Posts
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    If the marriage is definitely over, I suggest that you go and see a decent divorce solicitor as soon as possible. The solicitor will be able to consider all the facts with you and give you detailed advice, tailored to your circumstances.
    I'm a retired employment solicitor. Hopefully some of my comments might be useful, but they are only my opinion and not intended as legal advice.
This discussion has been closed.
Latest News and Guides