Separated, how much should I provide?

edited 31 August 2016 at 12:26PM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
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JackRSJackRS Forumite
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edited 31 August 2016 at 12:26PM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
I’ve been separated from my wife and 2 children for 6 months now. My children are 17 and 19 and both in full time education. My wife and Children don’t have jobs so my income is the only one. I’m lodging with a friend but need to find my own place now, obviously funding the family and myself is difficult on one income. The family home has no mortgage on it now so all paid for just the bills. Obviously they need to get jobs and are trying to but I’m looking for guidelines advice on how much I should provide them each month as I’m having to survive on little so I want to set some sort of reasonable budget.

What would be an appropriate proportion of my income should I give them?
How is it typically calculated?
I’ve looked on line at lots of sites but nothing gives an indication.


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JackRS started this discussion back in 2013 to ask for help and guidance. Three years on our amazing community continues to help him and his family. Read the full thread or skip to the last page to see how things are going now.



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Regards

JackRS
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Replies

  • neneromanovaneneromanova Forumite
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    Normally, according to CSA, you give 20% of your income for both the children until they end Education. You don't need to pay any bills as you're not living there.

    Once the kids leave full time education you don't pay anything.
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  • RASRAS Forumite
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    It depends on whether the children are in secondary education that permits their mother to claim Child Benefit for them.

    If the older one is at unviersity, your income will have been used to assess their loan and grant, with the expectation that you would make the expected contribution but you would not pay their mother for their keep.

    Your ex-wife needs to sign on for contributions based JSA and claim CTB and CTC to cover the cost of the younger child.

    In addtion you will pay 15% (for one) or 20% (for 2) children as required by the CSA.

    If your wife has not worked for a long time it may be appropriate to pay short-term spousal support, so she can fund re-training for example.
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  • duchyduchy Forumite
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    Why on earth do your children "obviously" need jobs ? They are in fulltime education.....Do you expect them to give that up simply because you've chosen to move out ?

    You need to seperate your marital finances. If your wife is job seeking she should be claiming JSA and tax credits for the children should be claimed by her as a single parent not as a joint claim as is possibly still happening at the moment. In addition as mentioned you should be paying child support of 20% of your income either as a private arrangement or via the CSA
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  • OrkneyStarOrkneyStar Forumite
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    duchy wrote: »
    Why on earth do your children "obviously" need jobs ? They are in fulltime education.....Do you expect them to give that up simply because you've chosen to move out ?

    You need to seperate your marital finances. If your wife is job seeking she should be claiming JSA and tax credits for the children should be claimed by her as a single parent not as a joint claim as is possibly still happening at the moment. In addition as mentioned you should be paying child support of 20% of your income either as a private arrangement or via the CSA

    I would expect any child from about 16 onward to look for some sort of job, ideally full time if they are not in education, and part-time if they are. I don't think the OP is expecting too much at that age.
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  • JackRSJackRS Forumite
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    They are not at uni but 6th form and college. At the moment because they have no other income they've been carrying on using the joint account to fund everything. My wife has a car which I pay for (lease scheme through work) the monthly standing order/direct debit bills are £650 so I thought I'd cover that and give them £1000 a month to live on. On top of that I'm paying for both children’s driving lessons at the moment. Does that sound reasonable until they have some of their own income? Out of what's left I need to clear £8K on interest free credit card by next Feb and pay rent and living costs so it is a stretch.

    I didn't think my wife (not divorced yet) was eligible for JSA as she's not been in work for more than 5 years?
    Regards

    JackRS
  • heartbreak_starheartbreak_star Forumite
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    I think that's far too much personally!!

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  • bodmilbodmil Forumite
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    OrkneyStar wrote: »
    I would expect any child from about 16 onward to look for some sort of job, ideally full time if they are not in education, and part-time if they are. I don't think the OP is expecting too much at that age.

    Yes and no, I agree with the sentiment but if it hasn't been expected or encouraged when the father was living there, I don't see why it is relevant only because he has left them.
  • JackRSJackRS Forumite
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    I think that's far too much personally!!

    HBS x

    So what is reasonable? I don't want to suggest something that will count against me in the divorce etc...
    Regards

    JackRS
  • LisaLou1982LisaLou1982 Forumite
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    Agree with the above that you are paying far too much!!

    The bills are for your wife to cover. You do not live in the house so you do not need to pay them.

    The tax credits and JSA she should claim will make things tighter than she is used to but she will need to budget accordingly.

    Re maintanence for your children, 20% of your income for 2 children whilst they are in FTE and then its obviously up to you if you want to carry on paying for their driving lessons etc
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  • JackRSJackRS Forumite
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    bodmil wrote: »
    Yes and no, I agree with the sentiment but if it hasn't been expected or encouraged when the father was living there, I don't see why it is relevant only because he has left them.

    The children earning is a separate issue for their own independence and value of money and experience. They have had jobs in the past just not currently. I pay them both £50 a month currently. I have encouraged them to find work to fund they're own passions in life not for the household.
    Regards

    JackRS
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