Oh no its another what would you do thread

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Marriage, Relationships & Families
52 replies 4.7K views
1356

Replies

  • suki1964suki1964 Forumite
    14.3K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    A school secretary should NOT be touching your childs head!
    A school secretary should not be touching your child full stop.
    Polite word............if it were me..........Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
    How dare she!

    I would be having more than words.....I would be making an official complaint to social services, education board and let the principle know your doing this!

    Teachers are not allowed to comfort a child....seriously, they could lose their job over the head of it......why should a secretary be allowed to touch your child
    Teachers are not allowed to even tell you they think your child has nits/lice.....they are only allowed to send out a recommendation from the school nurse advising parents to check their childs hair!!

    why was your DD singled out and embarassed in front of her friends???


    Grrrrrrrrrrr

    Slight over reaction wouldnt you say?

    Crikey when I was at school the dinner lady would be the one who pulled our loose teeth and Im sure we didnt worry too much who it was parting out hair having a look through, neighbours would do the same if we were in their houses playing and they suspected nits

    Singled out and embarrassed - the child is five years old, Im sure the friends wont even remember the event 5 mins after it happening

    What a sad state of affairs where parents jump up and down so much over every slight thing that teachers arent even allowed to comfort a child nowdays
  • suki1964 wrote: »
    Slight over reaction wouldnt you say? Maybe but the OP asked what forum posters would do.......

    Crikey when I was at school the dinner lady would be the one who pulled our loose teeth and Im sure we didnt worry too much who it was parting out hair having a look through, neighbours would do the same if we were in their houses playing and they suspected nits Nice!!!!!

    Singled out and embarrassed - the child is five years old, Im sure the friends wont even remember the event 5 mins after it happening maybe not but OP said the child was miffed......Im sure that OP even said her DD remembered what coloured paper was used on her xmas presents 3 years ago.....Kids remember the funniest things!

    What a sad state of affairs where parents jump up and down so much over every slight thing that teachers arent even allowed to comfort a child nowdays Agreed, but I didnt make up this rule....I think it was made up to protect teachers and pupils

    As parents we have to protect our children and at 5 years old if my child told me that incident had happened I would have been straight down to the school asking questions. Teachers have been trained in child protection issues, as have school nurses........what I was most vexed about was a school secretary checking the OPs daughters head for nits/lice.......Teachers train for years on how to educate our children, they are vetted before they take up any post, Nurses train for years and are also vetted before taking a post.......The school secretary is probably vetted but has she had child protection training? Does she attend teacher training days? No probably not, so why therefore is she touching a pupils head?

    There have been many tragedys/abuse cases all over the country, and it happens by people kids know and trust Ie Ian Huntley....some members of the clergy, even nursery nurses (not for one min am i suggesting that anything happened other than what the OP has told us!)

    My thoughts are if an adult in a trusted position is able to make a 5 year old child feel miffed and clearly uncomfortable...well enough to tell mum....without doing anything naughty then questions need to be asked!

    As I said before.....when it comes to our children they only have us to back them up, and at 5 being made to feel miffed can lead on to other problems ie self confidence ect...... As a parent of a child who has had major confidence issues due to some insensitive things being said to her/or done with her I can assure you its no joke!!
    :jIm going to be frugal:j
    :DIm going to be frugal:D
    ;)Im going to be frugal;)
    Beetlejuice Beetlejuice...................:rotfl:
  • kegg_2kegg_2 Forumite
    522 Posts
    Geez are we raising our little darlings to be so delicate that they cant handle a 5 minute check on their heads by a school secretary!!!

    The op asks what others would do.

    Well i would sit my child down and just explain that the school was just checking to see if she had picked up some unwelcome visitors so that i could evict them before they turned her head into their new home.
  • edited 1 December 2009 at 2:10AM
    mumoffour77mumoffour77 Forumite
    1.9K Posts
    edited 1 December 2009 at 2:10AM
    Kegg, honestly i would have done that too had it been a teacher.....and the other kids were checked so as to not make any one child feel uncomfortable!
    :jIm going to be frugal:j
    :DIm going to be frugal:D
    ;)Im going to be frugal;)
    Beetlejuice Beetlejuice...................:rotfl:
  • kegg_2kegg_2 Forumite
    522 Posts
    but the hair checking didn't worry the child as the op states

    it miffed as 1 of her pals had ribbed her about 2being sent to see the Head for a telling off"

    so her pals get the person she went to see and the reason wrong which upsets the child. It could have happened had she been asked to go the office for any other reason.

    As i see it the other children had no idea why she went to the office and so made up their own reason which they then ribbed her about.
  • kegg wrote: »
    but the hair checking didn't worry the child as the op states

    it miffed as 1 of her pals had ribbed her about 2being sent to see the Head for a telling off"

    so her pals get the person she went to see and the reason wrong which upsets the child. It could have happened had she been asked to go the office for any other reason.

    As i see it the other children had no idea why she went to the office and so made up their own reason which they then ribbed her about.

    Ok im sure op will be on to let us know what action if any she took:)
    :jIm going to be frugal:j
    :DIm going to be frugal:D
    ;)Im going to be frugal;)
    Beetlejuice Beetlejuice...................:rotfl:
  • suki1964suki1964 Forumite
    14.3K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    Crikey when I was at school the dinner lady would be the one who pulled our loose teeth and Im sure we didnt worry too much who it was parting out hair having a look through, neighbours would do the same if we were in their houses playing and they suspected nits Nice!!!!!

    Yes it was NICE, it was a neighbour keeping an eye out, it was called being part of a community where everyone looked out for each other and kids were in and out of everyone's houses and if we were out playing on the street mothers up and down were keeping an eye - if we were their kids or not
    What a sad state of affairs where parents jump up and down so much over every slight thing that teachers arent even allowed to comfort a child nowdays Agreed, but I didnt make up this rule....I think it was made up to protect teachers and pupils

    Perhaps because of knee jerk reactions like this?
    Singled out and embarrassed - the child is five years old, Im sure the friends wont even remember the event 5 mins after it happening maybe not but OP said the child was miffed......Im sure that OP even said her DD remembered what coloured paper was used on her xmas presents 3 years ago.....Kids remember the funniest things!

    Yes and I hvae cringing memories of school dinners which I hated and me being the one who held the table back from play time, But am I in need of counselling because of it? Nope. Have I made bad choices in my life because of the horror that for me was school dinners? NO
    Slight over reaction wouldnt you say? Maybe but the OP asked what forum posters would do.......

    I would say" So you were being checked for nits. Isnt it better it was done in the office and not the classroom? Sure it happens to everyone - dont you worry about it"

    Now if my child came home and said the school secretary had been in the toilet with her and no sickness or accidents had been the cause - then Id create
  • Firstly I would say that until you know the whole story I would try and hold back. Children do get the wrong end of the stick (not lying) especially if other children are saying things to upset her (which I think is the thing that bothered you most.)

    Also, I wonder if OP has taken this incident rather personally. I'm wondering if OP thinks the secretary was questioning her role as a parent (though I don't believe she was for a minute) Hope that makes sense OP.

    With regard to a secretary touching a childs head. Seriously...who would want to work in a school today?
  • WASHERWASHER Forumite
    1.3K Posts
    Could it be possible that the school secretary who would have been CRB checked btw, is the school first aider also and that's why she checked the hair.

    I'm a midday assistant at a school and I also work in the first aid room (qualified first aider), I would hate to think a parent would be unhappy with me because they saw me just as a dinner lady and I helped out their child on the school field because he/she was unwell or fallen over.
  • mumslavemumslave Forumite
    7.5K Posts
    We signed a form allowing the school to check for nits so would have had no problem with it at all. Your dd may just need reassuring that its just a check nothing else. Perhaps have a word with the teacher just explain how your dd says she felt.
    :starmod:Sealed Pot Challenge Member 1189:starmod:
This discussion has been closed.
Latest MSE News and Guides

Virgin Media & O2 launch Volt

Aims to boost mobile data & broadband speeds

MSE News

Cheap pet insurance

Top comparisons & hot deals

MSE Guides